


drawing new lines

by holtzmanns



Category: RuPaul's Drag Race RPF
Genre: F/F, Fake Dating, Fluff, Hilarity, Lesbian AU, Office AU, get ready fellas, what if we fake dated....and we were both girls
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-28
Updated: 2020-04-11
Packaged: 2021-02-27 08:14:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 43,967
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22443907
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/holtzmanns/pseuds/holtzmanns
Summary: “Okay, last rule.” Vanessa shoves the notebook in between them, intent on distracting Brooke from her nightmare of an Instagram account. “Five seems like a good place to end. Any ideas?”“I got one.” Brooke leans forward in her seat slightly. “Promise not to fall in love with me by the end of this.”Vanessa lets out a laugh, an actual laugh, because Brooke is awful presumptuous. “I’m only in this for free food and bragging rights against A’keria. That won’t be a problem at all, don’t you worry your little blonde head.” She pauses, looking back over at Brooke, who still has a shit eating grin on her face. “And you can’t fall in love with me, either. I know I’m irresistible and all that, but-”Brooke raises an eyebrow. “Please. I’m just doing this to get my friends off my back. You’ll be just fine.”
Relationships: Brooke Lynn Hytes/Vanessa Vanjie Mateo
Comments: 208
Kudos: 218





	1. chapter one

**Author's Note:**

> Hello, new multichap! This one has been an extremely fun one to write so far, and I can't wait to keep going. Hope you enjoy it as much as I do. Special thanks for Writ for being a wonderful beta, for listening to me throw ideas left write and centre and encouraging even the most headass of plots. Also shoutout to Barbie for coming up with Brooke's career in this fic, aka wanting an architect Brooke. Title of the fic from Flying by Wrabel. Enjoy!

There’s no part of Vanessa’s day better than lunchtime. 

The damn good lunch she’s packed if she’s meal prepped for the week. The myriad of cafeteria options if she hasn’t. The break from the politics and ridiculousness of working in the HR department. The top up of caffeine after her morning coffee begins to wear off. 

But the best part of it all? Having forty five minutes to talk smack with Silky and A’keria, gossiping about their love lives and their coworkers and being noisy enough to annoy everyone else in the cafeteria. 

Today, Vanessa’s the one partly responsible for inciting their shenanigans. She just can’t help it, not when Aquaria from marketing apparently has a new boyfriend and Vanessa knows for a fact that her new man ain’t gonna make her come as many times as Vanessa had when they were dating. 

“I’m telling you, she ain’t never gonna have as good as when she had me.” Vanessa takes a sip of her coke as she watches Aquaria by the vending machine, arm in arm with her man. 

“You don’t sound jealous at all, boo.” A’keria’s smile is all too knowing, and Vanessa has to stick her tongue out at her. 

“I ain’t jealous.” She _isn’t._ “Aquaria was a total pillow princess in bed. You think I want that situation again? Nooo, thank you.”

Silky snickers. “We were almost convinced for a second there.” 

“Please. I feel bad for her _,_ if anything. She probably ain’t gonna get what she needs from him.” Vanessa tries to picture what the clean cut guy beside Aquaria does in bed. Somehow, with the side part and tucked in shirt and loafers, she finds that she can’t. 

“And what is it that she needs? Your tongue? Your fingers?” A’keria wiggles her eyebrows. “Your strap?” 

“Y’all hateful.” Vanessa scowls as Silky starts smacking the table from laughing so hard. 

“All I’m saying is that Aquaria can do better. Though honestly, so can I. And she wasn’t even my last girlfriend. I can get me the ladies.” Vanessa scoffs as she says it. She totally can. She’s a ladykiller. 

She is _._

Ish. 

“Is that so, Vanj? Tell us, who are the last few girls you got?” A’keria cocks her head, wiggles in her seat like she’s excited for Vanessa’s answer. 

Hmph. 

“Well. There was Aquaria, obviously. Who was _all_ over me when we were dating. There was Kameron. Ariel. There was Scarlet for a short time, too.”

Silky wrinkles her nose. “Y’know, I always forget you dated Scarlet. That concept’s fucking weird.”

“It was fucking weird. That’s why we broke up so fast.” Vanessa shudders. “All I’m saying, though, is that I can get me a lady. I’m a catch, I really am. Hey, stop laughing!”

A’keria and Silky are too busy guffawing to hear her, and Vanessa can’t take this attack on her reputation, she really can’t. She’s got game, and she knows she can prove it.

“Fine. Name a lady. Any lady that works here, even if she straight. I bet I can get her to go out with me.” She wiggles her eyebrows. “It’s the Vanjie charm.”

“Ooh bitch, you’re asking for it. This gonna be good. We gotta think.” Silky drums her fingers on the table, leans back in her chair as A’keria takes a sip of her drink.

Vanessa takes a bite of her sandwich, tries not to be bothered as Silky and A’keria let out _hmmms_ and _I wonders_. That is, until Silky slams her fist on the table.

“Brooke Lynn motherfucking Hytes.”

“What-”

“Not _her-”_

“I said what I said.” Silky gestures to Brooke, one of the firm’s top architecture project managers, currently waiting in line for her coffee across the cafeteria. 

A specimen so fine that even Vanessa feels a tingle running down her spine. Or maybe that’s because she needs to pee. 

Regardless. 

“You land her? I’ll buy your lunch for a month.” Silky leans back in her seat, crosses her arms. 

“Shit, really?” Vanessa raises an eyebrow at her. “An entire month?”

“You’re acting like you have a chance of success in the first place.” Silky looks a little too amused for Vanessa’s liking, and she feels herself bristle just a bit. 

“I sure as hell do.” Sure, maybe Vanessa’s talking out of her ass, but she’s not gonna show it. Not to Silky and A’keria who are regarding her with smug smiles. 

So what if Brooke, in her six inch stilettos and pencil skirt that hugs her ass perfectly, is sure as fuck out of Vanessa’s league? So what if Brooke’s known for turning down men and women alike that try to ask her out without so much as a second glance?

Brooke doesn’t wear a ring, which means that she’s fair game. And Vanessa’s going to make it happen. 

“Just you wait. Imma make Miss Hytes fall head over heels for me, fuckers.”

Sure, the drama of Vanessa’s statement is slightly ruined by Silky letting out a snort, but the effect is strong enough. 

Vanessa’s not going to have to meal prep for an entire month, if she can play her cards just right. 

* * *

Brooke Lynn Hytes is a creature of habit. 

Waking up, then going on a thirty minute run. Breakfast of kale and egg whites. Reaching work ten minutes early. Touching base with all the leads on her current project, making sure that it’s going smoothly. Getting the work done that she needs to before lunch rolls around, a lunch that she spends on her phone catching up with even more work emails. Working until precisely 4:30 pm, when she can roll out the door in time to make her spin class at 5:15 up in midtown. 

There isn’t much that disrupts the routine if she has anything to say about it. That is, until she’s packing up at 4:32 and slipping her coat on and a woman knocks on her office door, entering before she can say anything. 

“Hytes, right?” The woman flashes her a smile bright enough to knock out the power in the city, and Brooke’s attention is definitely captured away from her things on her desk. 

The woman looks familiar. HR, maybe? Maybe the one who’d come around after John had said lewd things to Brooke’s secretary. Though Brooke’s not sure. “And you are…?”

“Oh! Right.” The woman pauses, sticking out a hand. “Vanessa.” 

Brooke shakes the woman’s hand, noting that her grip is firm, something she always likes. “To what do I owe the pleasure?”

“I’m here on…non work related business.” Vanessa’s smile is sheepish, and Brooke pauses, waiting for her to continue, because she has no idea what the business could possibly be. 

“So, here’s the thing. I have a bet to win that involves no meal prep for me for an entire month.” Vanessa drums her fingers on Brooke’s desk, almost nervously. 

Brooke raises an eyebrow. “What does that have to do with me?” 

She’s never really interacted with Vanessa before, so she’s not sure how-

“The bet involves you, too.” Vanessa’s fidgety now, and it almost makes Brooke want to laugh, how nervous she is. “Two coworkers bet that I couldn’t get you to go out with me.”

Really?

Brooke snorts, because really, she should have expected it. “Did they, now?”

“Listen, I know it sounds wack-”

“No thanks.” Brooke goes back to packing up her things, tucking confidential files into the drawers of her desk, pulling her coat over her shoulders. “Don’t think I can help you out with that.”

Vanessa, for her part, remains unperturbed. “There’s perks. You can split the free food with me.”

Brooke snorts. “While that’s a very generous offer, I’m still going to have to say no.” 

“Aw, why not?” Vanessa comes around the side of her desk, and Brooke gets a good look at her. She’s looking up at Brooke with a defiant expression in her eyes, one that doesn’t want to take no for an answer, and Brooke almost respects it.

But she also has a spin class to get to, which means that ‘almost’ isn’t really enough to make her want to be late. 

“Okay, look.” Vanessa continues when Brooke doesn’t answer, instead focused on zipping up her coat. “This ain’t all just for my benefit. It could help you too.”

“Oh yeah? How so?” Brooke lets her keep talking for the sole fact that she wants to see where Vanessa’s reasoning will go. Vanessa’s incredibly entertaining, as much as Brooke doesn’t want to admit it. 

“Ain’t there lots of people who try and snatch you up? You’re like _The Bachelorette_ of this office building.” 

Brooke has to hold back a laugh. “There are people that have tried to ask me out, yes. But I wouldn’t necessarily call myself that.” 

“Chris Harrison must be lurking around here somewhere to host a season for you.” Vanessa’s grinning, and Brooke can’t help but notice how cute it is. “I’d wanna be on that season.”

“Would you now?”

“Yeah, but that’s not the point. The _point_ is, you got lotsa people bothering you, right? This way you can pretend to date me and just say you’re taken.” Vanessa’s looking at her like she’s just solved the world’s biggest math problem. 

“I don’t know if that would necessarily work. We’d have to convince people that we were actually together, first of all.”

Vanessa waves a hand. “It ain’t gonna take Oscar-worthy acting to fool these buffoons. We could do it. Plus, ain’t you got people who bother you about finding someone? Friends and shit?”

Brooke thinks back to her last get together with Nina, when they’d gotten drinks and Nina kept waving her engagement ring around like it was a prized possession, like having a ring on her finger had magically solved all of her problems. Which it hadn’t, obviously, because despite the engagement ring Nina still has to deal with her car transmission needing repairs and her boyfriend (fiancé) coming home from work too late. So what’s the point, really?

Though it never stops Nina and Courtney and Steve from trying to set Brooke up with their friends ( _‘wanna go out with her, she kissed me in college which means she’s definitely still a lesbian, right?),_ from them lamenting on and on that Brooke will eventually find the right person, she will, despite the fact that Brooke doesn’t really care.

Or want to find anyone, really.

Brooke’s got her job and her vibrator. The only two things she needs in life, really, for fulfillment. 

But Vanessa’s still standing there in her too tall heels that don’t do much to increase her height, really, an expectant look on her face as she waits for Brooke’s answer, Brooke can tell that Vanessa’s already gotten her figured out.

“Maybe.”

“This can get them off your back. All we gotta do is show up at some social engagements and work events and shit and, bam. Fake couple. We both get a payout.” Vanessa grins, really grins, rubbing her hands together like a scheming cartoon villain, and Brooke can’t help how entertaining she finds her.

“You’re still offering half of your free lunches?” Brooke holds back a snort.

“We can cross that bridge when we get to it.” Vanessa waves a hand, before reaching across Brooke’s desk to grab the stack of post-it notes that sits next to her coffee mug. 

Vanessa scrawls ten digits in messy handwriting, sliding them across the desk towards Brooke. “In the meantime? Think about it. Get back to me. You can be part of the greatest finesse ever pulled at this godforsaken office. All you gotta do is say yes.” 

With that, Vanessa turns on her heel and leaves, but not before shooting a wink in Brooke’s direction. Brooke finds herself stuck in place for longer than she wants to admit, replaying the sway in Vanessa’s hips as she lets the door close behind her. 

She snaps out of it when she looks down at the numbers scrawled on the post-it note, followed by a short, almost indecipherable message in messy handwriting. 

_U know how to reach me. Xoxoxo, V._

* * *

The text comes through a couple of days later when Vanessa’s going over some policy that her supervisor wants to review again for the millionth time, and she nearly drops her phone in excitement when the unknown number pops up, because _finally._

**_Fine. We can try to do this._ **

“Yesssss!” Vanessa can’t help the little fist pump that escapes her, because Brooke’s agreed and she gets free food but most importantly, the chance to rub it in the faces of Silky and A’keria. 

Vanessa saves the number as quick as she can before replying. 

_VVM: knew u would see the light sooner or later._

**_BLH: awful presumptuous._ **

_VVM: it’s just smart business!_

**_BLH: how is any of this a business deal?_ **

_VVM: I dunno but I sure as hell am feeling as smug as the suits in our office building._

**_BLH: regardless, we gotta lay down some ground rules. For this to even work._ **

_VVM: I’m snoozing already_

_VVM: let’s do this over lunch_

**_BLH: are you food motivated for everything in your life?_ **

_VVM: maybe_

_VVM: Benny’s at 12:30?_

**_BLH: unbelievable_ **

**_BLH: see you then_ **

* * *

Benny’s Sandwich Shop is a hole in the wall across the street from their office building that, in Vanessa’s eyes, has the best damn paninis in the city. She rubs her hands together in excitement before digging into her veggie grilled sandwich, wanting to make it last as long as possible.

Brooke's sitting across the table, and looking at her with a slightly raised eyebrow. “That excited for your sandwich?”

Vanessa scoffs at the sad looking bowl in front of Brooke. “Better than coming to a sandwich shop and ordering a damn salad. What are you, a rabbit?”

“A rabbit who knows what she likes.” Brooke raises her fork towards Vanessa before taking a bite. “So. Rules.”

“Right, rules.” Vanessa rummages in her bag before pulling out a notebook and pen. She’s not going to be unprepared, not when she can get free lunch from A’keria out of it. “Number one, no dating anyone else while we faking it. Obviously.”

“You’re acting as if that’s a rule I would break.” Brooke has a smile playing on her lips and Vanessa scoffs. 

“Just being thorough. I won’t either, so.”

“Or I’d be _so_ heartbroken if you did.”

Vanessa sticks her tongue out at Brooke, who seems to be enjoying their situation way too much. “Not even an hour into fake dating and you already pulling on my pigtails.”

“Sorry.” Brooke winks and Vanessa’s breath absolutely does _not_ hitch in her throat at the sight, no ma’am. “Rule two?”

“We gotta show up at some events together. To sell it and all that, otherwise A’keria ain’t gonna buy it.” Vanessa can already see A’keria’s piercing gaze, can already hear the soft _mmmhm_ that she always lets out whenever she gets suspicious. 

“Doable.” Brooke writes it down in the notebook. “Events like what?”

“Like some group dinners or evenings out, or holiday or New Years parties coming up, shit like that. To make it look like we cuffed for the season.” Vanessa pictures going to holiday parties with Brooke hanging off of her arm, maybe in a tight dress that hugs her-

She needs to focus.

“Okay. Rule three?” Brooke’s pen is poised to write and Vanessa kinda likes it, how in sync they are already.

Vanessa almost doesn’t want to bring up the next one, but since it’ll be a big component of faking a relationship, she grits her teeth and leans forward on the table to ask the question. “PDA. Thoughts?”

Brooke wrinkles her nose. “Not too big on overdoing it, but I can take some pecks here and there. Holding hands, being arm in arm.”

Vanessa nearly _awws,_ because Brooke’s description is akin to the time in seventh grade when she'd ‘dated’ a boy in her class for three weeks before he broke up with her by the baseball diamond.

Not her finest moment, dating wise.

“I can do that.” The more she thinks about it, the more Vanessa is open to the idea. Participating in all of the innocent, early parts of a relationship, the ones viewed by everyone. 

A small part of Vanessa wonders how Brooke’s hand will fit in hers, if it’ll be warm or cold. If she’ll fit against Brooke’s side like she belongs there. She's excited to find out.

Brooke leans forward in her seat. “Not a rule but - how are we going to tell people we started seeing each other? What will the story be?”

Vanessa pauses and thinks, really thinks. She wants it to be elaborate but not so elaborate that it’s unbelievable, but just enough detail to convince others that their story is authentic. 

“Easy. We ran into each other in the hall and you spilled coffee on my shirt and helped me clean it up in the bathroom, and the rest is history.” Vanessa’s proud of her imagination, really, until Brooke snorts.

“So we started dating because you took your shirt off?”

Vanessa huffs. “Got any better ideas?”

“Sticking with the coffee theme, here’s one. We started talking in the line for Starbucks and coincidentally ordered the same drink, then sat and talked about it, before talking about other things. Then you left your number on my cup before you left.” Brooke looks entirely too pleased with herself, the smile lighting her features as she takes a bite of her salad.

Vanessa’s not sold, though. “Why am I the one who writes the number?”

“Why, never had the balls to leave a lady your number before?”

“Hey.” Vanessa swats at Brooke’s arm, ignores the way she’s snickering. She knows that Brooke’s trying to bait her, she is, that somehow she’s already figured out the way that Vanessa ticks.

Doesn’t mean she’s going to try something different this time, though.

“Fine. I write the number. Let’s go with yours.” Vanessa lets out a huff before grabbing the pen from Brooke’s hand, writing their origin story on a corner of the page.

But they need to get back to the task at hand, something that Vanessa realizes when she puts the lid back on her pen. She uncaps it once more. “Rule number four. Social media. We gotta add each other on Instagram and post with each other here and there.”

“All I post on Instagram are my two cats.” Brooke’s smile is sheepish and Vanessa can’t help but let out a snort.

“Shit, you sure you ain’t a crazy cat lady?” Vanessa winks at her before reaching out, grabbing her hand, something that feels more right than it should. “We’ll sprinkle in some actual humans in between the cats.”

Brooke squeezes her hand back, something that doesn’t escape her notice. “Fine. Gimme your phone so I can add myself.”

Vanessa files a note to herself to stalk through Brooke’s instagram later after Brooke accepts her follow request, to look past the cats and for some more information about her, maybe about her past exes-

Nah. Just to be thorough, make sure she knows just enough. 

Brooke holds up her own phone, the screen on a boomerang of Vanessa on holiday with Silky, facing away from the camera and pulling her bikini bottoms down for just a second. “Seems like your vacations are fun.” 

“Bitch- _hey._ ” Vanessa tries to reach for Brooke’s phone but Brooke’s arms are longer, easily holding the phone out of Vanessa’s way.

“I feel like I’m going to have a _great_ time scrolling through your instagram, I really do.” Brooke’s looking smug, too smug, and Vanessa huffs.

“Don’t think I won’t find your weird ass posts, too.”

Brooke’s eyes are sparkling. “I know you will. Though I’m not as defensive as you are."

“Okay, last rule.” Vanessa shoves the notebook in between them, intent on distracting Brooke from her nightmare of an Instagram account. “Five seems like a good place to end. Any ideas?”

“I got one.” Brooke leans forward in her seat slightly. “Promise not to fall in love with me by the end of this.”

Vanessa lets out a laugh, an actual laugh, because Brooke is _awful_ presumptuous. “I’m only in this for free food and bragging rights against A’keria. That won’t be a problem at all, don’t you worry your little blonde head.” She pauses, looking back over at Brooke, who still has a shit eating grin on her face. “And you can’t fall in love with me, either. I know I’m irresistible and all that, but-”

Brooke raises an eyebrow. “Please. I’m just doing this to get my friends off my back. You’ll be just fine.”

Vanessa wonders what it’ll be like meeting Brooke’s friends. What they’re like, what they’ll think of her. Not that it matters, really, since it’s all gonna be fake. But still.

“I think that about covers it all.” Vanessa looks at their list, pleased with how it’s all beginning to come together. “We’ll be able to fool these hoes, easy.”

“You think so?” Brooke trails her pen over the list, as if she’s trying to find something that they’ve missed.

“I know so. And hey, if we wanna add or take something out, we can always change it. This list open to edits.” 

Brooke looks satisfied. “Good. And like any good paper contract, we have to sign on the dotted line.” 

Her signature on the bottom of the page is fancy, all loops and flourishes and Vanessa can’t help but scoff. “What kinda extra-ass signature is that?” 

“A nice one. Yours is boring.” Brooke points to Vanessa’s, smaller and definitely one with less loops and Vanessa crosses her arms.

“You’re boring.”

“Ooh, great comeback.” Brooke’s smiling, though, and it keeps Vanessa from wanting to reach over the table and shove her. “So, are we good to go?”

Vanessa sticks out a hand and Brooke shakes it with a firm grip. “That we are, blondie. Time to pull the greatest trick that our office ever did see.” 

* * *

_Rules:_

  * _No dating anyone else._


  * _Show up at events together._


  * _Light PDA only._


  * _Interact on social media like a couple._


  * _No falling in love._



* * *

_Instagram story posted by @vanessavanjie. Location: @bennysdiner. Tagged: @bhytes. Description: A boomerang of Brooke Lynn Hytes sitting at a table, munching on what appears to be a salad. A gif of a rabbit eating a carrot is in the bottom left corner._


	2. chapter two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Why you ordering two?” Silky’s looking at her with narrowed eyes, and it’s all Vanessa can do to not yell in excitement as she tries to keep herself blasé. 
> 
> “Oh, no reason. Thought I’d drop by Brooke’s office, that’s all. We going on a date tonight.” She holds her fingers out in front of her, inspects her cuticles, as if it’s an everyday statement, a normal occurrence to go out with the office building’s most eligible bachelorette. 
> 
> Which it completely isn’t, by the way that A’keria slams her breakfast sandwich down on the counter.
> 
> “You’re what?” Silky’s yell makes other customers around them turn around, stare, and Vanessa doesn’t even care, because the looks on Silky and A’keria’s faces are enough to keep her laughing for days.
> 
> “Goddamn, Vanj. You really got that blonde skyscraper to agree to go on a date with you?” A’keria looks mildly impressed. “To be honest, I didn’t think you had it in you.”
> 
> “I told y’all, I’m a catch.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you SO so much for the lovely response to the first chapter. I'm so glad you guys are enjoying it so far as much as I am. This story is so, so fun to write and such a lovely refresher from the angst trains I usually end up on while writing. Hope you enjoy this chapter as well! Writ, as usual, is the most wonderful beta.

Vanessa is already bouncing in the Starbucks line before even getting her sweet, sweet hit of caffeine. But she’s two days into this fake dating business, and the real finesse is about to start. 

“Hi, welcome to Starbucks, what would you like?”

“Can I have a grande blonde roast, two creams, two sugars...and a grande dark roast, black with room for milk?” 

Vanessa’s own coffee needs to be chock-full of sugar in order for her to be able to drink it, but Brooke? Vanessa’s not quite sure what she likes, but a dark roast with cream and sugar brought on the side seems like a safe option.

Silky and A’keria look at her with questions on their faces as they wait for their drinks to finish, A’keria already munching on her breakfast sandwich.

“Why you ordering two?” Silky’s looking at her with narrowed eyes, and it’s all Vanessa can do to not yell in excitement as she tries to keep herself blasé. 

“Oh, no reason. Thought I’d drop by Brooke’s office, that’s all. We going on a date tonight.” She holds her fingers out in front of her, inspects her cuticles, as if it’s an everyday statement, a normal occurrence to go out with the office building’s most eligible bachelorette. 

Which it completely isn’t, by the way that A’keria slams her breakfast sandwich down on the counter.

“You’re _what?_ ” Silky’s yell makes other customers around them turn around, stare, and Vanessa doesn’t even care, because the looks on Silky and A’keria’s faces are enough to keep her laughing for days.

“Goddamn, Vanj. You really got that blonde skyscraper to agree to go on a date with you?” A’keria looks mildly impressed. “To be honest, I didn’t think you had it in you.”

“I _told_ y’all, I’m a catch.” Sure, Vanessa’s voice is a bit haughty for someone who is absolutely not going on a proper date with Brooke, rather a fake one, but regardless. She’s gonna milk it. 

“I’m surprised someone sees it.” A’keria shares a look with Silky, who is shaking her head in disbelief. “Even more surprised that it’s her.”

“No one can resist the Vanjie charm.” With that, Vanessa picks up both drinks, winking at her friends before heading to the elevators. “Deuces!”

Brooke is mildly amused when Vanessa swings by her office, placing the coffee in her empty hand. “How’d you know I like my coffee black?”

Vanessa raises an eyebrow at her. “You look like the kind of person who thinks that putting sugar and cream in coffee ruins the taste or something.”

“It does actually, it-” Brooke pauses when she sees Vanessa snickering. “Hmph, never mind.”

“You enjoy your boring coffee, and imma enjoy this sugary goodness.” Vanessa’s own drink smells like caffeinated heaven, and so what if she takes a big sniff of the cup? No one’s judging her. 

Okay, maybe Brooke is, from the way a single eyebrow of hers is raised, but Vanessa also doesn’t care. 

“You are absolutely going to have a sugar crash in an hour or two from that.” Brooke points at her cup as she takes another swig. 

“Bold of you to assume my body hasn’t built up an immunity to sugar because of how much of it I have on the daily.” 

“You’re ridiculous.” But Brooke laughs as she’s saying it, a real laugh, by the way her eyes are crinkling at the edges. 

“Count on it.” Vanessa plops into Brooke’s fancy desk chair, her office a stark contrast from Vanessa’s cubicle. “Damn, this is comfy. D’you have to buy this shit? Or did they just give it to you?”

“Amazon, actually. I have a bad back.” Brooke leans against her own desk, facing Vanessa. Her legs look like they go on forever in her heeled boots, though Vanessa is absolutely not focusing on them, no ma’am. 

“Send me the link, would you? I wanna pimp out my boring cubicle.”

Brooke snorts. “Now that’s a trashy reality show I would watch.”

“Speaking of which, we got our first fake date tonight.” Vanessa crosses one leg over the other in the office chair, leans back against it. “I’m thinking shitty TV show marathon.”

Brooke raises an eyebrow. “You wanna Netflix and chill on the first date?”

“What? We’re not actually-” Vanessa sputters on her words, because Brooke’s looking at her with a note of amusement in her eyes. “Damn, you making me sound like I got a one track mind, mama.” 

“I mean, it’s our first date, isn’t it? You gotta take me somewhere classy first, treat me real nice.” Brooke is fully enjoying the conversation at Vanessa’s expense, leaning forward as she winks at her. “If you wanna keep a lady around you have to make her feel like a queen, y’know.”

“Goddamn, not even real dating and we got demands here.” But it doesn’t deter Vanessa in the least - in fact, if Brooke wants to enjoy this scam that they’re pulling off, Vanessa’s gonna make sure she does by planning the best damn date ever. 

* * *

Vanessa discovers that she has incredible difficulty planning the _‘best damn date ever,’_ even when it’s fake. 

“Y’all, where do I take her? I ain’t planned shit! Just told her to dress up real nice, now she expecting something special and my dumbass was so excited for the date that I forgot to plan. Shit!”

To an outsider, it looks like Vanessa’s officially lost her marbles, talking to herself. While she certainly does feel that way, she’s got her good Judys on the open FaceTime screen, ready to help her in times of crisis such as these. 

Vanessa’s rifling through her closet, pulling out dress after dress because _none_ of them will work, not in the least. They’re too short or too nun-like or too thotty - she needs the perfect amount of classy, and it’s nowhere to be found. 

“Vanj. Vanj. That fancy restaurant uptown?” 

Silky’s suggestion is nice, sure, but absolutely no help. “That place has been booked up for months, Silk. Ain’t no way we gonna get a reservation for tonight.”

“Take her to a movie or some shit, then balance it with a mediocre restaurant. They’ll cancel each other out.” A’keria’s suggestion is smart, sensible, but-

“But that’s so _boring_ , that’s what everyone does on every first date to ever exist. I wanna wow her.”

Vanessa’s not even sure why it matters so much to her - the date is not even a real date, for crying out loud. But part of her still wants to impress Brooke, make her enjoy herself, because she’s still taking time out of her own evening to spend with Vanessa after all, real or not. 

“I ain’t got nothing left for you.” Silky shrugs, grabbing another handful of popcorn that she’s popped specifically to watch Vanessa’s dramatics. “You on your own. It’s now or never.” 

Vanessa looks out the window of her apartment, sees the glittering lights and sky scrapers that feel so far away and-

“Shit y’all, I’ve got it!”

* * *

“Planetarium, huh?” 

Brooke’s impressed - Vanessa can tell these types of things. It makes her more excited than she wants to admit. 

“Ah y’know, nice chill first date material.” As if Vanessa hasn’t already tried to pat herself on the back for coming up with it. “Anyone tell you that you look killer, by the way?”

Brooke does, in a black knee length dress that makes Vanessa’s eyes constantly trail to her-

She can control herself. She’s not a teenage boy. Or is trying not to be. 

Brooke gives her an appreciative once over in response, one that makes Vanessa squirm under her gaze even though she knows that there’s nothing behind it, that it’s platonic. Because there’s something about having Brooke’s full attention that still feels like a bit too much, like it’s taking her breath away. 

“Where do you want to sit?” Brooke’s looking at her with an eyebrow raised, as if she’s already asked the question more than once, as if the first time had flown over Vanessa’s head. If it has, Vanessa’s unaware of it. 

But she’s not going to make it a habit. Brooke’s just a person - a smoking hot one, sure, but still just a person. Someone who’s helping her win a bet against A’keria and Silky, and so Vanessa owes it to both of them to make sure they have fun in the process. 

So, she’s gonna make sure Brooke has the best fake first date in her damn life. 

“Let’s go to the back. My neck's gonna cramp up if we take the front.” Vanessa takes a step up the stairs, but not before interlocking fingers with Brooke - after all, if she’s gonna play the part, she’s gonna fully go for it. 

Brooke shrugs, but doesn’t pull her hand back. Instead, she tightens their grip. “Works for me. Lead the way.” 

The theatre darkens as they take their seats, and the announcer’s voice is hard to focus on, it is, when the ceiling above them is lit up with stars and galaxies not unlike those that would sparkle in Vanessa’s dreams when she was six and had wanted to be an astronaut. The twinkles that seem so in reach, so close by, not like the huge bundles of fire that they actually are, the ones that burn should anyone get too close. 

It’s mesmerizing. 

Vanessa feels the resurfacing of the niche outer space facts from her childhood, from the secondhand kid’s encyclopedias that her mom had gotten for her at garage sales. The ones that Vanessa would pour over, trying to absorb everything she could, back when her biggest problems in life could be solved by thumbing through the pages. 

“Did you know that any these stars coulda burned out ages ago and we wouldn’t know, ‘cause of how fucking far away they are? They’re hundreds of light years away so when we see them burn out, it’s actually happened centuries back. But we only find out now.” Vanessa whispers the words because the narrator is still droning on and she doesn’t want to disrupt anyone else. 

But it’s cool. 

Brooke looks over for a second, unspoken questions on her face that Vanessa can’t quite decipher. “How’d you know so much about space?” 

Brooke’s voice is a whisper too, not wanting to disturb the presentation either, and it strikes Vanessa how much the reflection of the stars in Brooke’s eyes is really making them shine. 

“Astronaut was my backup career after HR.” The statement has the intended outcome of making Brooke laugh, and it feels better than Vanessa wants to admit. “You ain’t had obsessions as a kid?” 

Brooke pauses, really thinks. “Mine was the Titanic, when I was eight. Not the movie, but the actual sinking of the ship itself. I was fascinated by it.”

Vanessa wrinkles her nose. “The ship? Why?”

“I dunno,” Brooke shrugs, “think it was the way it contradicted itself. Supposed to be the unsinkable ship, branded as such. Treated as such. Yet it went down on the first voyage.” 

“That’s what happens when you get overcocky. Can’t mouth off too much.” Vanessa tries to hold back a laugh when Brooke looks over at her, the scandalized furrow of her brow fitting perfectly from the way her mouth has slightly fallen open. “Am I wrong, though?” 

Brooke lets out a huff. “No. But still.” 

But Brooke’s face can’t hold its serious expression for long, though, something Vanessa is delighted to see. Vanessa grins when Brooke leans back in her seat, tugs on the bracelet on her wrist. “Tell me more outer space facts, space girl.”

“What kinda nickname is that?”

Brooke grins. “One that somehow fits you.”

* * *

_Instagram story posted by @bhytes. Location: @griffithobservatory. Tagged: @vanessavanjie. Description: A boomerang of Vanessa spinning in a circle, her skirt twirling around her, under a backdrop of stars._

* * *

“So, there we were in Target, my abuela _completely_ having lost control of the motorized scooter, about to crash into the display of paper towels, my mom running after her and screaming, a buncha other customers watching with their mouths open, and me and my aunt laughing so hard that we’re about to fall over.” Vanessa’s eyes are lit up as she sets the scene, and Brooke doesn’t think she’s ever laughed so much in her life.

“Stop, stop. I’m gonna pee.” Brooke has to wipe a tear from her eye, trying desperately to hold back the giggles that are threatening to bubble up again whenever she so much as makes eye contact with Vanessa.

“So then she crashes, right? But then one of the wheels is still going so she starts spinning. _Spinning._ Meanwhile my mom’s tryna turn off the dang thing, and you know what starts playing in the background?” Vanessa takes a bite of her pasta, and Brooke wants to take a sip of her own drink, she really does, but she’s afraid of doing a spit take at this point. 

“Oh, god. What?”

Vanessa giggles before she can get the words out. “‘You Spin Me Round’ by Dead or Alive. You know, _‘you spin me right round baby, right round like a record player…’”_

“Shut _up_.” Brooke has to clap a hand over her mouth because the other diners at the restaurant are looking over at the two of them, but she can’t help it, can’t help the laughter because Vanessa is hysterical. 

“I ain’t playing, it really did! Me and my aunt were absolutely hollering and no help whatsoever to my abuela. Some random pimply sixteen year old that worked there had to come and turn her scooter off.”

“She wasn’t hurt, was she?” Brooke pauses, realizing that the story could have more serious consequences on the way. She doesn’t want to be disrespectful towards Vanessa’s grandma, she really doesn’t-

But Vanessa waves her hand. “Nah, she was fine. In fact, when they got her up again, she started grumbling on about how the fastest setting on the scooter was still too slow. Adrenaline junkie.”

Brooke tries to picture what Vanessa’s grandma would look like, speeding a little too fast on her scooter. “Somehow, she sounds like you when you’ll be older.” 

Vanessa snorts. “I can’t even argue that. We basically the same.” 

“You’re ridiculous, and I love it.” Brooke rests her chin on her hands as she glances across the table over towards Vanessa, still shoveling down her pasta. “God, why haven’t we ever talked before?” 

“Maybe ‘cause we’re in completely different departments?” Vanessa raises an eyebrow, her lips curling up. “And tell me you’d still give me the time of day if I hadn’t barged into your office one day and roped you into this little scheme of mine.”

“Hey, I would have!” Brooke’s indignant, because she so would. She’s not that closed off. “I think.”

She thinks. 

“So me striking up conversation in the Starbucks line about my wheelie-loving abuela would have gone over well?” Vanessa lets out a laugh, and Brooke can’t help it either, at the mental image of Vanessa tapping her shoulder to do so. 

“To be fair, that’s not a scenario that’s ever really crossed my mind before. Do you often bother people about your grandma?” 

Vanessa doesn’t miss a beat. “Only the ones who get as delighted about it as you do.” She leans back in her seat, putting her fork down. “That being said? I’m glad we talking now, ‘cause you’re more fun than you seem.” 

Brooke scoffs. “I’m plenty fun, thank you very much.”

“Oh yeah? What’s your last Venmo transaction?”

Brooke wrinkles her nose. “What does that have to do with anything?” 

“Venmo transactions tell a shit ton about a person. Now c’mon, open up that shiny phone.” Vanessa’s fingertips tap on the table, and Brooke lets out a huff, but does so. 

Hopefully it’s something cool. Fun. Exciting. Not something boring like-

“A cat tree? Your last transaction was for a cat tree?” Vanessa’s trying not to laugh, Brooke can tell, and she has to hold back a groan. 

”It was a really cool cat tree! It had multiple levels and all these little hiding spots that Henry and Apollo will love and-” Brooke cuts herself off, dropping her head in her hands. “Ugh. Cat trees can be fun.”

Vanessa reaches out to pat Brooke’s shoulder, her eyes still sparkling. “I believe you, mama.” 

“No you don’t.” Brooke’s voice comes out muffled, and sure, she’s acting like a ten year old, but she can’t help it. 

“I sure don’t. So guess for our next fake date you gonna introduce me to those pussycats of yours, hmm? We gonna be spending some time together.” Vanessa pauses, her lips pursed together as to keep herself from cracking up. “Not your actual pussy, remember, we _fake_ dating, not real dating, jesus-”

“Oh, shut up.” Brooke reaches out to shove Vanessa’s shoulder, her hand nearly landing on the table when Vanessa dodges it. “Just for that, no meeting the cats for you.”

“Mean.” Vanessa sticks her tongue out at her and Brooke snorts. 

But now that Vanessa’s said it, she’s coming around to the idea. It would be kinda nice to hang out more with Vanessa, even if the purpose is to post things on social media to fool her friends into thinking that they’re dating. Because it _would_ be fun - her and Vanessa clearly get along great, and, well-

Having another friend wouldn’t be so bad. 

“Tell you what. You can come over and meet the cats, but I pick the show we watch.” 

Vanessa grins at her suggestion. “Tryna Netflix and chill me already?” 

Brooke rolls her eyes. “You’re relentless.”

“And yet, you enjoy it.” Vanessa wiggles her eyebrows as she takes a sip of her drink. “Fancy that.”

It's true. Vanessa is hysterical, fun to talk to. Sure, a little ridiculous at times, but it’s what Brooke needs - someone to balance her out a little. 

“Honestly? Somehow, I kinda do.” 

* * *

“You went on a date.”

“Yep.”

“You, Brooke Lynn Hytes, went on a date.”

“You bet.”

“ _You_ went on a _date?”_

“Is that really so hard to believe, Nina?”

Nina takes a big sip of her wine, as if she needs it to get through the conversation. Brooke can’t blame her for it.

“I’ve known you for seven years and not _once_ have you been on a date.” Nina’s pointing a finger at her, and she shrugs.

“What’s wrong with being picky?”

“It’s not being picky if you absolutely refuse _everyone_. Except, it seems, for this new girl.” Nina’s already leaning forward, resting her head on her hands with a grin on her face. “So, you need to tell me absolutely everything about her because this is the best day of my entire life.”

Brooke raises an eyebrow. “More than the day when Ben proposed to you?”

Nina pauses. “Well, maybe. Actually, I think those two would be on the same level.” She shrugs when she sees Brooke’s skeptical expression. “C’mon, this literally never happens. It’s exciting. Now tell me about her.”

“She’s in HR, we struck up a conversation and she asked me out on a date and I said yes?” So what if Brooke’s explanation ends in a question? 

“You said yes.”

“Yeah? How else would we have gone on a date?”

“But you _never_ say yes.” Nina’s brow is furrowed as if she’s trying to solve the world’s biggest math problem, and it almost makes Brooke laugh.

“I did this time.” Brooke shrugs, taking a sip of her wine to avoid eye contact with Nina. 

“But why? Why this time?”

Brooke pauses, because she can’t give Nina the _real_ answer. That they’re doing this for shits and giggles and so that Brooke won’t have to deal with people trying to set her up.

So, she goes another route. 

“I dunno. She’s funny, I like her. She made me laugh more in that first conversation with her than I’ve laughed with anyone else. So, maybe I just want a bit more laughter in my life.”

It’s true, when Brooke thinks about it. Fake dating or not, Vanessa is fun. Someone who is genuinely delightful, genuinely fun to spend time with. Their date hadn’t even been a real one but it’s probably the best one Brooke’s had, maybe ever, solely because of how much she’d enjoyed herself. How much fun Vanessa is to be around.

Brooke’s going to try and stay her friend, once they’re done this nonsense. To still hang out with Vanessa and be her friend ( _are_ they friends?) because she’s someone that doesn’t drain or tire Brooke out, despite her exuberance.

Nina’s eating it up, from the way that her eyes are wide, how her lips are forming a soft pout. “That’s so fucking _cute_ , you absolute sap.”

“That wasn’t sappy in the least and you know it.”

Nina waves a hand. “Whatever. From you, it’s practically a declaration of love. Anyway, can’t wait to be your maid of honour at the wedding.”

“Don’t you start.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> find me at @plastiquetiaras on tumblr!


	3. chapter three

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Okay, that’s some wholesome shit.” A’keria’s looking impressed as she makes her proclamation and Silky’s nodding, and a sliver of satisfaction blooms in Vanessa’s chest, because...they’re buying it. 
> 
> It’s working.
> 
> Maybe, just maybe, she’s smiling partly because she’s remembering the cheek kiss. But it’s not the only reason, definitely not, because the fact that they may actually be able to pull off this shit?
> 
> Exciting as hell.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for all the sweet reviews and comments on this fic! Each one of them makes my heart do a little dance and they make me so happy. I appreciate all the kind words more than you all know. Enjoy chapter 3! Thank you writ as always for being the best beta.

“You’re taking this really hard, Silk.”

“All I want. All I want on a day like this, a day with too many damn annoying clients, a day where my coffee machine didn’t work this morning, is a nice chocolate glazed donut. That’s all I want. Is that too much to ask for, Kiki? Huh?”

Vanessa’s sympathetically patting Silky’s shoulder because she gets it, she really does. A good donut can do wonders. “Maybe they’ll have ‘em tomorrow, Silk.”

“They better.” Silky lets out a sigh, a deep sigh, before taking a bite of her sandwich. “Or I ain’t gonna survive this time.” 

A’keria, for her part, lets out a scoff. “Why not buy a different kinda donut? Those jelly filled ones are good-”

“Noooo, Kiki, _no.”_ Silky drops her head down onto the table, her voice muffled by her arms around her face. “The chocolate glazed ones hit different. Jelly ain’t the same.”

“Tomorrow gonna be your day, Silk. You’ll get your donut.” 

“I better.” 

The cafeteria is loud around them the way it always is, as Vanessa scarfs down the stir fry she’d haphazardly thrown together last night. A’keria’s already done eating, texting her man on her phone as she absentmindedly pats Silky’s elbow, and Silky is still pouting into her sandwich.

“I’ve got just the thing to distract you from the pain of your donut.” Vanessa turns towards Silky with a grin. “You ain’t grilled me yet about my date two nights ago.” 

Sure, Vanessa may regret it later when Silky and A’keria really start pressing her, but for now, it’s the perfect remedy to her woes. Silky looks like she’s on the same page from the way her eyes light up, the way she drops her sandwich back onto the cafeteria table. Even A’keria puts her phone down.

“True that. We ain’t even find out much about that tall blonde tree.” Silky wiggles her eyebrows. “So? How was it? Was the pussy good? Do people even say that, ‘was the pussy good’? Either way, give us the nasty ass details.”

Vanessa wrinkles her nose. “You the truly nasty one. We ain’t get dirty on the first date.”

Silky immediately boos, while A’keria lets out a _hmph_.

“We real demure ladies.” Vanessa flips her hair over her shoulder, ignoring the eyerolls that both Silky and A’keria send her way.

“We all know that the farthest thing from the truth about you, Vanj.” A’keria lets out a snort. “So, if y’all ain’t get nasty, what else did you do?”

“The planetarium was nice! She thought my space facts were cute.” Vanessa can’t help but grin when remembering, because the way Brooke had asked her questions, had listened attentively was...sweet. Nice of her to do.

“What kinda kindergarten romance…”

“Shut up, Silk.” Vanessa reaches out to smack Silky’s arm as she cackles. “Then we went to a restaurant and were _way_ too loud, and she’s easy to get along with? She laughs at my jokes, she likes my stories-”

“Wait, someone actually laughs at your jokes?”

“Shut _up_ , Kiki.” Vanessa pouts but can’t help but join in Silky and A’keria’s laughter either. “Rude ass bitches.”

“You know we love you, we playing. Now, go on.”

“She kissed my cheek when I dropped her home. I woulda done it first, but she was too tall for me to reach her damn face in her heels.” It’s true, Vanessa had been thinking about it when Brooke had reached her door. Keeping up the act and all that, finding out if Brooke’s cheek really was as soft as it looked. 

But Brooke had beaten her to it, pressing her lips to Vanessa’s cheek and leaving a lipstick print that Vanessa hadn’t noticed until she’d gotten home.

It was kinda nice. 

“Okay, that’s some wholesome shit.” A’keria’s looking impressed as she makes her proclamation and Silky’s nodding, and a sliver of satisfaction blooms in Vanessa’s chest, because...they’re buying it. 

It’s working.

Maybe, just maybe, she’s smiling partly because she’s remembering the cheek kiss. But it’s not the only reason, definitely not, because the fact that they may actually be able to pull off this shit?

Exciting as hell.

* * *

“The hell is the point of a spin class? Y’all incapable of balancing on two wheels and riding a real bike?” 

Brooke looks over at Vanessa after tying her shoes, and can’t help but be amused at the sight. Vanessa’s already in her workout gear, tapping her feet on the floor. Her arms are crossed, her lips in a slight pout. 

It’s Brooke’s turn to pick their activity, and what better to bring Vanessa to than her spin class? It’s one of her favourite parts of the day, taking it out of her legs and helping her work up a sweat the same way that ballet used to, back in the day. 

Plus, she wants to see Vanessa in a spin class for the entertainment value alone. 

“Don’t knock it ‘till you try it.” Brooke tugs on one of Vanessa’s two french braids, her smile growing when Vanessa lets out a slight huff. “I have a feeling you’ll enjoy yourself.”

“Boring ass bikes, that don’t even move…wait.” Vanessa pauses in her tracks and Brooke nearly bumps into her, and she watches as Vanessa’s eyes widen at the sight of the spin studio in front of them. 

Vanessa’s mouth is open as she stares at the purple walls, the flashing lights that make it almost look like they’re in a club. A sight that would be believable to the eye were it not for the rows and rows of exercise bikes, with attendees suited up in athleisure, metal water bottles in hand and already starting to stretch. 

“What the hell kinda place is this?” Vanessa takes a tentative step inside, her face lighting up as she takes in the room around her, shoulders already bopping to the Lizzo song playing over the speakers. 

Brooke has to resist the smug grin that’s threatening to grow on her face. “Told you.” 

Truth be told, she’s a bit relieved that Vanessa’s open to the idea, even looking a bit excited. It’s not that she doesn’t do things with friends, or invite them places - it’s just different with Vanessa. Sure, they’re both playing a part, but Brooke wants to make sure that Vanessa’s having fun at the same time, that she doesn’t regret asking her of all people to pull off her ridiculous scheme. 

Brooke looks around for the last component that they need to complete the vibe of the spin class, the biggest entertainment during her workouts, who has to be somewhere nearby since the class is about to start- 

“ _Hello_ , America, no need the line up to greet me. Actually, please do, because this class is gonna be a production.” Monique, the class instructor, waltzes in, nearly tripping over her own bike at the front of the room. “You all gonna mount those noble steeds of yours or what?”

“I like her already.” Vanessa grins as she tries to climb on top of her bike, one beside Brooke’s in the third row. Brooke has to hold back a laugh as Vanessa lets out a small huff, trying and failing to get her leg over the seat. “Why’s this thing so damn high?”

“You can adjust the seat and lower it, y’know.” Brooke gets off her bike, crouching down so she can fiddle with Vanessa’s, adjusting the seat to be a good few inches lower. “Make it fun-sized.”

“ _Bitch-”_

“Fixed! Try sitting on it now.” Brooke giggles as Vanessa scowls, an expression that turns into a reluctant nod of approval when she’s able to climb onto the bike, wiggling around on the seat. 

The way Vanessa’s face lights up when she can finally reach the pedals nearly makes Brooke laugh. “You’re so tiny. It’s kinda cute.” 

It’s true. Brooke wonders what Vanessa would look like in one of her sweaters, her jackets. How much Vanessa would have to roll up the sleeves so that her hands could peek through. How she’d probably be able to pick Vanessa up with one arm if she wanted to or give her a piggyback ride.

Not that she’s even done that to anyone in ages. Not that it matters. 

“I’m _normal-_ sized, you giraffe.” But Vanessa’s grinning, and Brooke can tell that she doesn’t mind. 

Brooke’s about to ask Vanessa when the last time she’s ridden a bike is when a rap song starts blaring over the speakers, one that she hasn’t heard before but one that Vanessa clearly knows, from the way she’s already belting out the lyrics as they start to pedal. 

* * *

_Instagram story posted by @vanessavanjie. Tagged: @iammoniqueheart, @bhytes. Description: a spin studio with flashing purple lights, Brooke front and center and taking a sip from her water bottle. Caption: ‘this place crazy…’_

* * *

“These stairs are gonna kill me. I’m accepting my death now, you gotta go on without me ‘cause my legs are a hundred percent jello.” Vanessa’s gripping the railing as they climb down the stairs to leave the studio, and Brooke sticks out a hand to her, one that Vanessa gratefully reaches for. 

“You did a great job. I think you’re the first person in that class who’s made Monique laugh that hard while teaching.” 

Vanessa grins. “All the Vanjie charm. What can I say?”

“Irresistible.” Brooke snorts, wrapping an arm around Vanessa’s shoulders once they’ve reached the sidewalk. “You still good for making some food at my place?” 

“Are you kidding? That class has left me starving, and if I don’t get food soon imma explode, so _yes._ Feed me.” Vanessa tugs on her hand for good measure as they walk towards the subway, and the warmth that Brooke can feel growing in her chest overtakes any stresses that had been previously building up in her head about the evening ahead of them. 

She really has found a good friend. 

Vanessa’s eyes dart all over Brooke’s apartment as they enter, over the paintings on the wall and the big couch in her living room and the sleek surfaces in her kitchen. “So this is what an architect’s salary gets you, huh?”

Brooke shrugs. “Didn't always. The intern years and five or so after that had me in a tiny studio apartment, too small for one person. Except that I shared it with two roommates.” 

Vanessa whistles as she taps her fingers on the granite countertops of her kitchen. “What changed?”

“Time and experience, mostly. Keeping up good relationships and building up a client base who will refer others after being happy with what they receive.” Brooke pulls out two wine glasses from her cupboard, holding them out so Vanessa can see them. “Drink?”

“ _Yes_ please. White, if you got any.”

Brooke pours them each a glass, setting one down in front of Vanessa before coming to sit beside her on the bar stools by the counter. “What about you? Tell me more.”

“‘Bout what?” Vanessa raises an eyebrow as she takes a drink. 

“Why HR? What led you there?”

Vanessa shrugs. “I dunno. Just floated, I guess? First job outta school and I just stayed here and moved up a little. It wasn’t really the end goal, mostly because I didn’t know what the fuck to do after college.” 

“What happened to wanting to be an astronaut?” Brooke nudges Vanessa’s arm as she says it, and it has the intended outcome of making Vanessa let out a little laugh, nudge her back. 

“That got crushed after high school physics classes when my ass couldn’t have cared less about gravitational forces or Newton’s laws or whatever. I don’t wanna do math, even in space, no thank you. I got my sanity.”

Brooke snorts. “Fair.” 

“I dunno. I always feel like I should be doing something more, something else other than this, y’know? I just don’t know what that thing even _is_ , and it feels weird.” Vanessa looks down at her wine glass, swirls it a bit. “Like I shoulda figured it out by now.” 

Brooke’s heart tugs at seeing the rare vulnerability in Vanessa’s eyes, the way she’s looking up at her without the protection of her outgoing personality, of her sense of humour that she uses to mask over whatever she wants to hide. It’s interesting, this quieter side of Vanessa, and the fact that Vanessa’s letting her see it doesn’t escape Brooke’s notice. 

Brooke reaches a hand out, interlaces Vanessa’s fingers with her own. It’s nothing romantic, not really, but more comforting, grounding. She rubs her thumbs in little circles, noticing the way that Vanessa’s shoulders become a little less tense, her breath less stuck in her throat. “There’s no imaginary timeline, y’know. Not everything has to happen on the same day as it happens for others. There’s a reason everyone is different from each other, why we all have different lives and different jobs and are supposed to be doing different things.” 

“Yeah, I know.” Vanessa rests her face on her palm. “We all on our own paths and shit. I just wish mine was clearer.”

“Hey, Harrison Ford was a carpenter for his young adult life and didn’t have his big break until he was in his 30s. Van Gogh didn’t pick up a paint brush until his late 20s. Both of them were successful later on, but earlier? They had time to think, to grow, to figure out what they wanted.” Brooke squeezes Vanessa’s hand. “They didn’t get stuck in things that they didn’t like, because they allowed themselves the time to decide. And if they did it? So will you. And you’ll be so great at whatever it is that you decide to go into.”

Vanessa gives Brooke a reluctant smile, her lips pursing. “You buttering me up all nice, I see what you doing. It would be nice to just _know_ though, and get started on it. Like, your ass going into architecture, knowing that it’s what you wanted to do. Finishing school, getting a job in the field? Already high up in your career but still so young? You got it together.” 

Brooke thinks back to the late nights at the studio, the constant stressors while trying to keep her head afloat. “Can I tell you a secret?”

Vanessa’s eyes are curious, an eyebrow already as she looks at Brooke. “What?”

“I had no idea back then that I was on the right path for myself. Still don’t, really.” 

It’s something that bugs Brooke every now and then, in the back of her mind. She’s worked so hard, put in so many hours in her field to get where she is, to have a steady job where she’s doing well and is able to support herself. But is it really what she wants? What she’d strived for back in undergrad?

Brooke doesn’t know. But there’s no going back in time, no changing her path. 

Vanessa’s looking at her with a furrowed brow, questions in her eyes, so Brooke continues. “I question my past decisions all the time, thinking of different scenarios and things that _could have_ happened if I had chosen a different major or went to a different school or picked a different career path. But after investing so much time in this one, I feel like I have to stay in it, y’know? Like it’s too late to start over in anything, but at the same time I have no idea if I’d even _want_ to in the first place.” 

Vanessa whistles. “Damn. So we two lost bitches, huh?” 

Brooke snorts, clinking her glass of wine against Vanessa’s before taking a sip. “You’re right about that.” 

It’s kind of nice, though. Talking to Vanessa about thoughts that she tries to ignore during her daily life. Seeing that Vanessa doesn’t have her shit together, despite the way she’s always happy and laughing and looking like a million bucks. But also the fact that Brooke gets to show Vanessa that she doesn’t have it together, either. 

The two of them are more similar than Brooke had originally thought, and it feels comforting, somehow, the fact that Vanessa feels like she can share things with her. The fact that Brooke herself is okay with telling Vanessa things too, despite the fact that they’d never really spoken before a few weeks ago. 

Brooke’s ready to say something sappy, tell Vanessa how grateful she is for her friendship or something equally as cheesy, before Vanessa hops off her stool, leans her elbow on her shoulder. 

“So. We gonna cook some food, or what?”

* * *

“I’m losing brain cells watching this. I can physically feel the cells in my brain deteriorate the longer this show is on.”

“Pfft, stop being so dramatic. Now shush, the two beekeepers are gonna break up over Google Translate again.”

Brooke feels like she’s losing her mind, but for some reason, _90 Day Fiancé_ is a trainwreck that she can’t tear her eyes away from no matter how hard she tries. Vanessa is no help, shovelling popcorn into her mouth from their shared bowl on her lap with her eyes glued to the TV.

Brooke grabs a handful for herself, because she’s going to need it to survive any more of this show. “Do you watch this every week?”

Vanessa waves a hand. “Not every week. Sometimes it goes on hiatus for a week or two, and lemme tell you, that shit is rough. I need my fix.”

“Okay, but why is she going to Costa Rica for part of the 90 days? She’s just gonna leave him here?” Brooke can’t help herself, really, from paying attention because it’s on the screen, and there’s only so much she can do to tune it out. 

Vanessa, for her part, grins. “Knew you’d like this show.”

“I don’t _like_ it-”

“And yet we gonna watch again next week, ain’t we?” Vanessa’s eyebrow is cocked and Brooke hates that she’s probably right.

“Maybe.”

The arrival of yet another ad break is a blessing, because at least Brooke doesn’t feel obligated to focus during an Activia commercial. She just can’t get over the concept of the show, really. What the point of it all is. So much fuss, so much extra work to still end up miserable. 

“Why do you think they do it?” Brooke dips her hand into the bowl, grabs another handful of popcorn when the commercials end. 

“Romance. Duh.” Vanessa sticks her hand into the bottom of the bowl, pulls out some M&M’s from the depths. “ _Nice.”_

“Is it even romantic, though? Having to move to a different country and live with someone you probably don’t know very well at all, just so that you can get a green card?” It seems too much, too manufactured. Enough that Brooke can’t tear her eyes away from the trainwreck on the screen. 

Vanessa’s unfazed. “Isn’t true love supposed to make you wanna cross oceans for your boo?” 

Brooke snorts. “Who said that?”

“Einstein.”

“Liar.”

“I dunno, it’s kinda fun to watch the ones that _do_ make it. The ones who get through all the shit and somehow make it to the other side. Get married for real, have babies and kids. Defy all the odds.” Vanessa almost looks wistful as the logo for the show pops back up on screen, before fading to yet another couple arguing. “It does happen.”

“Seems like a big chance to take, moving across the world for someone.” Brooke’s not sure if she could ever do something like that, for another person. Something that’s so life changing. 

“Hey, if it pays off? Worth it.” Vanessa shrugs. “Now shush, I wanna watch Juliana learning about what a pre-nup is.”

The episode fades into another (because of course Vanessa’s found a marathon airing on TV, of course she has) as the evening hours grow in numbers and Brooke’s relieved that neither of them have work tomorrow. Vanessa’s pulled her feet up onto the couch, the giant hoodie that she had pulled on post spin class nearly big enough to dwarf her. Apollo and Henry are nestled into her side and her lap, respectively, something that makes Brooke’s heart want to melt because they rarely enjoy new people, but already seem to feel comfortable with Vanessa. She looks like she belongs there, a fact that Brooke likes more than she wants to admit. 

“So, what do you wanna do next? We’ve been on a few fake dates now. Gotta admit, you more fun than half the girls I go out with.” Vanessa wiggles her eyebrows. “Had no idea you were the same brand of headass as me.”

Brooke gasps. “I am _not-_ ”

“You so are, blondie.” Vanessa snickers, leaning up to kiss Brooke’s cheek when she pouts. And somehow, Brooke can’t even find it in herself to be mad. “You called that guy’s shorts _‘jorts’_ during the last 90 Day Fiancé episode. That’s headass.”

“They’re _jean shorts-_ ”

“And you came up with ‘jorts.’” 

“Shut up.” Except Brooke can’t hold back a giggle, not when Vanessa’s already cackling too. “You’re so dumb.”

“Alright, Miss Jorts.” 

“Hey!”

Vanessa pulls out her phone. “Gonna change your name in my phone to that.”

“You will _not-”_

Brooke reaches for the phone but Vanessa is quicker, holding it away from her. Brooke sees her chance though, as Vanessa’s hoodie rides up when her arm stretches above her head. Vanessa lets out a screech when Brooke tickles her, the phone falling and burying itself somewhere in the couch cushions - not that either of them notice, really. 

“Mercy, mercy! You play _dirty!”_ Vanessa nearly falls off the couch as she holds her hands up, saved by Brooke’s arm wrapping around her waist to catch her. 

Brooke pulls Vanessa back up, tucks the strands of hair that have escaped from her braids behind her ears. Vanessa’s eyes are so warm and bright - something that Brooke notices, sees sometimes. But Vanessa grinning, her full focus on her, is a lot, enough to make Brooke’s heart feel all warm too. Because Vanessa’s joy is contagious.

“Truce?”

“Absolutely truce. We already got our workout in for the day with Monique. Now we just gotta rest.” Vanessa scoots down on the couch for good measure, resting her head on Brooke’s shoulder. “You my pillow now.” 

Not that Brooke minds, really, because Vanessa is warm and nuzzles even more into her side when she puts an arm around her. It’s nice. Brooke knows that it’s not real, that it’s not romantic and they’re not in an actual relationship - and thank god for that, because she doesn’t do them, doesn’t want one. But Vanessa is comfortable, and not only while leaning against her on the couch. The way her face lights up when she’s talking, the way she’s hysterical without even knowing it and manages to cheer Brooke up without even trying to. 

Brooke’s glad for it, and almost doesn’t want it to have to ever end. From the way Vanessa’s already talking about more things to do while hanging out, more things to watch together, maybe Brooke doesn’t ever have to worry about that ever happening, even if their fake dating time period comes to a close in the future. 

Because Vanessa’s more than just an acting gig to her now, more than just a scene partner. And for some reason, the fact doesn’t scare her in the least. 


	4. chapter four

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I’m serious!”
> 
> “You sound like those boys in middle school who used to try to get girls to kiss them for practice.” Brooke raises an eyebrow, smirk on her face.
> 
> Vanessa huffs. “You really think we can pull this shit off in front of others without practicing? Looking all natural and shit?”
> 
> “You can say it, you just really want to kiss me, I get it.” Brooke ducks out of the way before Vanessa swats her menu in her direction, already anticipating the retaliation.
> 
> “Your white ass wishes.” Vanessa sticks her tongue out at her. “But you know I’m right. We gotta rehearse.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter four is here! Thank you SO much to everyone who's left a sweet review, please know that I love you and they make my heart grow every time. It's the most wonderful notification, so thank you. I appreciate you all so much. Enjoy this one! It's getting spicy. Thank you writ for always being the bestest beta.

They had talked about it earlier this morning, about how it would be a good idea for Brooke to casually walk by, meet Silky and A’keria in the cafeteria at lunch. To further sell their fantasy and make it a little bit more believable.

It doesn’t mean that Vanessa’s leg isn’t bouncing like mad as they start eating lunch, though.

“I told you, Silk, you gotta whittle down those Tinder photos. No man cares about the fact that you visited the southernmost point in the country or whatever. And you’re holding a bowl of fried chicken in this one! They both gotta go.” A’keria’s taken Silky’s phone hostage, ignoring the latter’s grumbles about how she can _‘grab herself a man on her own, thank you very much_.' 

Vanessa wants to peek over, roast some of Silky’s photos herself, she really does. Except that she can’t get her eyes to focus on one spot for too long, bouncing around the cafeteria looking for the familiar head of blonde hair because Brooke is bound to walk over at any time. 

And so it’s only logical that the light touch on Vanessa’s shoulder makes her nearly yell, jump out of her seat, amidst Silky and A’keria bursting into laughter. Except that their guffaws end as quickly as they start, because both of them are looking behind Vanessa up at-

“Didn’t mean to startle you, babe. Brought you a coffee.”

Vanessa nearly chokes on the bite of pad thai that’s in her mouth, turning around to see Brooke looking as cool as a cucumber, as if neither of them are about to act in front of the two biggest skeptics that Vanessa knows. 

Brooke places the coffee on the table before leaning down to press a kiss to the top of Vanessa’s head, one that makes her let out a small squeak, a blush rising to her cheeks that must be because of the current high stakes on the table. 

Brooke barely bats an eye, dropping into the empty seat beside her. Vanessa’s rational thinking isn’t back just yet, because she needs to say something, _anything_ , before A’keria and Silky even open their mouths in front of Brooke, but Brooke beats her to it.

“I’ve heard so much about you both. I’ve been looking forward to meeting Ness’s best friends.”

_Ness?_

“Ness?!” 

“Damn Vanj, you got your girl calling you Ness already? Y’all must be whipped as _hell_ -”

“And you ain’t even introduce us properly yet, when she already calling you Ness of all names-”

Vanessa’s brain decides to start working again and it’s about time, because the tomfoolery is already out of control despite Brooke only being at their table for thirty or so seconds. “Both of y’all. Shut up.”

“No chance of that, no ma’am.” Silky’s positively delighted, from the way her eyebrows are reaching higher and higher altitudes along her hairline and the way she’s nearly vibrating out of her seat in glee. “We heard about you too, Miss Brooke Lynn Hytes. What do people call you? Is it Brooke? Brooke Lynn? Miss Hytes, if you nasty?”

Brooke, to her credit, doesn’t look fazed in the least. In fact, she’s trying to hold a laugh back herself, hiding her grin behind her hand. “Brooke’s just fine.”

“Well, since you here, you may as well help us with Silky’s Tinder profile-”

“I ain’t _ask_ for your help, you ho-”

“-Help us in getting her to bring all the boys to her yard, yeah?”

Despite the imminent threat of gaining grey hair from Silky and A’keria’s routine lunchtime behaviour, Vanessa discovers that she’s enjoying Brooke being there. Brooke keeps up with them, throwing shade right back and enough to make A’keria nearly do a spit take. Vanessa can see the small hint of approval in both Silky and A’keria’s eyes, in the way A’keria passes over her phone to Brooke so that she can add her on Instagram, and how Silky actually lets Brooke fiddle with her dating profile. It’s almost disappointing when Brooke looks down at her watch and sighs, reaching out to squeeze Vanessa’s hand.

“Got a meeting in ten. I have to go.”

Silky and A’keria beat Vanessa to a response, twin protests leaving both of their mouths. 

“C’mon, we were having some fun-”

“We ain’t even finished crafting my Tinder bio-”

“I swear, y’all like her more than me now.” Vanessa snorts, looking up at Brooke, who doesn’t look like she wants to move either. 

Silky shrugs. “You really want us to answer that?”

Brooke winks at Silky and A’keria. “I like you both more than her, too.” 

The two of them screech with laughter, Silky fully slapping the table, and it’s all Vanessa can to do keep her mouth from dropping open. Introducing Brooke to Silky and A’keria has to be the biggest mistake she’s ever made, because of course they’ve gotten along famously, enough to gang up on her. But Vanessa kind of loves it - not that she’ll ever admit it, or resist the chance to play up her dramatics.

She crosses her arms, letting out a huff. “The absolute _nerve_ -”

“Sorry, babe.” Brooke stands up, pressing a kiss to Vanessa’s cheek before slinging her bag over her shoulder. “I’ll make it up to you later.”

Vanessa has to resist watching the extra sway in Brooke’s hips as she walks away, tries to keep her eyes up because she’s not going to objectify her fake girlfriend, no ma’am. Though it’s hard, especially when Brooke shoots one last look over at her before turning a corner and out of view, knowing exactly the effect that she’s having. 

Her friends are no better, Silky letting out a soft whistle while A’keria shoots her a look.

“Bitch.”

“I know!” 

A’keria puts her phone down on the counter, and that’s when Vanessa knows that she’s truly emphasizing her statement. “ _Bitch_.”

“I’m saying! Got me a damn dreamboat.” Vanessa’s absolutely going to pat herself on the back for her acting skills later - not that it’s hard, trying to fake being into Brooke. It’s pretty damn easy.

“That makes one of us.” Silky grumbles, swiping on her phone. “Some of us still be stranded on Tinder.” 

“Shut up about the Tinder for ten seconds, Silk.” A’keria holds up a hand when Silky protests, turning back towards Vanessa. “Now how she gonna make it up to you?” 

Vanessa shrugs, letting a smirk rise on her face. “A lady never kisses and tells.”

As if she’d have anything to tell. But still, it’s fun to make her friends think that she will.

It gets Vanessa thinking about it though, as the second half of the day passes. The two of them have kept the fake PDA to a minimum - but what happens when they’re in a situation where they have to kiss in front of other people? Like for a photo op, or to sell their acting even more? They can’t just go in and lock lips for the first time with an audience watching them. An audience that will be able to then _tell_ that they’ve been faking, because real couples don’t kiss as if they’re kissing a mere acquaintance.

Well, friend.

Brooke’s her friend now.

Though it doesn’t change the fact that they need to prepare, somehow, should the situation arise.

* * *

Brooke lets out a snort into her menu when Vanessa brings it up a week or so later, and Vanessa has to resist the urge to pout over the restaurant table.

“I’m serious!”

“You sound like those boys in middle school who used to try to get girls to kiss them _for practice._ ” Brooke raises an eyebrow, smirk on her face.

Vanessa huffs. “You really think we can pull this shit off in front of others without practicing? Looking all natural and shit?”

“You can say it, you just really want to kiss me, I get it.” Brooke ducks out of the way before Vanessa swats her menu in her direction, already anticipating the retaliation.

“Your white ass wishes.” Vanessa sticks her tongue out at her. “But you know I’m right. We gotta rehearse.”

Brooke knows that she is, because they end up on her couch the next evening, facing each other. 

Vanessa, for her part, is trying her best not to giggle. “I feel like we’re twelve.” 

Brooke raises an eyebrow. “This was your idea, you remember that, right?”

“Still! This feels like spin the bottle.” 

Vanessa’s never really noticed how pretty Brooke’s eyes are, how some of the layers in the front always escape from her ponytails or buns. How Brooke’s softened up more and more around her as the weeks have passed, sitting in a crewneck and leggings with her face free of makeup - something Vanessa would never have been able to picture back when she’d first made the bet with A’keria and Silky.

The fact that Brooke’s still somehow adorable, though? Vanessa definitely wouldn’t have predicted that back then, either.

Brooke shuffles a tiny bit closer to her, crossing her legs on the couch. Her grey eyes search Vanessa’s, her lips pursing while she’s trying to hold in a laugh. “Should we just go for it? Do you want mood music or something?”

“Shut up.” Vanessa swats at her arm, moving in a little bit closer and leaning up as much as she can. “Bring your tall ass closer to me.” 

“Can’t hear you down there-”

Closing the distance between them by going on her knees is the right idea, because Brooke’s closer than Vanessa’s realized and she lets out a little gasp into the kiss. Brooke’s lips are soft, her hands circling around her back and Vanessa feels like she’s boxed in, because everything around her is Brooke. The smell of her shampoo, the way her hair is soft and easy for Vanessa to run her fingers through. The way Brooke’s hand on the small of her back pulls Vanessa in flush up against her. The way Brooke lets her tongue slightly dart out as the kiss deepens, as if she doesn’t want it to end. And if the way Vanessa lets her own mouth open more, feels a small moan escape? She doesn’t either. 

Vanessa draws in a breath when they pull back, and it makes sense that the wideness of Brooke’s eyes matches her own, because damn.

She’s never had a first kiss like that.

“So.” Brooke’s voice comes out higher than usual, and Vanessa knows she would laugh if she wasn’t feeling exactly the same way. “I think we’ll be convincing enough, don’t you?”

“I think you’re right.” Vanessa can’t draw her eyes away from the slight flush on Brooke’s cheeks, the way Brooke’s eyes keep darting back down to her lips, as if she’s thinking of kissing her again. “We’ll fool ‘em, no problem.”

They’ll be able to act, make Silky and A’keria and everyone else believe it. Because Brooke’s a great actress, that’s for sure.

Is she?

Vanessa almost wants to kiss her for a second time and find out. Though she’s too much of a chicken to do so, because Brooke’s already pulling back, settling herself against the couch and grabbing for Vanessa’s television remote.

“So, another _90 Day Fiancé_ episode?”

* * *

_Brooke’s lips press kisses made of fire up Vanessa’s neck, leaving flames in their wake that feel like they’re going to burn her from the inside out. Her hand roughly tugs on Vanessa’s jeans, pushing them down before her fingers meet the dampness beginning to soak through the lace of Vanessa’s panties._

_“Gonna keep these on, ‘kay?” The rasp in Brooke’s voice makes Vanessa shiver, as does the slight nips that Brooke dots by her ear._

_Vanessa pushes her hips up, bumps them against Brooke’s because she wants more, she wants Brooke to take her there. “Please.”_

_“So polite now.” Brooke’s voice is a purr as her fingers trail along the outside of the lace, teasing at Vanessa’s folds through the fabric._

_Vanessa can tell that Brooke knows what she’s doing, that she already has an idea of how to undo her, leave her a mess on the already damp sheets. And right now? She’s not far off at all._

_Brooke lifts up her other hand to brush the sweaty strands of hair off of Vanessa’s face, and the look in Brooke’s eyes is commanding, yes, but also soft. Like she’s enjoying herself, like she loves seeing Vanessa like this. Like she wants to do this over and over again._

_But then Brooke brings her face back down, trails the kisses from Vanessa’s neck to her collarbone and to her tits, swirling her tongue around one nipple and pinching the other between her fingers. The little whimper that leaves Vanessa and the slight shudder that travels down her body appear to be exactly what Brooke wants, because her other hand stops the teasing along the lace, and instead roughly tugs the fabric to one side._

_“You want my fingers? I wanna see you beg all prettily, baby.”_

* * *

“I-”

Vanessa wakes with a start, her sheets damp and her hips twitching and she’s not sure why she’s feeling so warm, really, until-

Brooke’s hands. Brooke’s mouth on her. The way she’d been ready to make Vanessa beg for it, the way Vanessa had been reduced to a whimpering mess with just a few words and a cocked eyebrow. 

_Shit_. 

She’s just had a sex dream about her sex-on-legs fake girlfriend. The one who she’d kissed for the first time last night, and only for practice in case they ever have to kiss in front of friends, for crying out loud. 

Brooke Lynn Hytes, secret _90 Day Fiancé_ lover, who, according to Vanessa’s subconscious, is a damn sex god. 

Vanessa wants to push the thoughts away, forget they’ve ever happened because shit, how is she supposed to look Brooke in the eye now? Make small talk and pretend everything is fine and dandy except for the fact that now she can picture what Brooke would look like with her head in between her thighs? 

Vanessa squeezes her legs together, feels the wetness that is pooling and she has to resist a groan, because of course she’s still turned on. Of course she’s not going to be able to stop picturing Brooke fucking her practically into another dimension. 

Vanessa needs to get a grip. She’s not going to be having sex with Brooke anytime soon, because they’re not dating, nor is Brooke a one night stand that she’s going to fuck and then forget. She’s a project partner, one helping Vanessa pull off the most iconic finesse to ever exist. One who deserves better than to be objectified by Vanessa’s subconscious.

It’s hard to resist, though, the feeling of her own hand traveling lower and lower, until her fingers are circling her own clit. Vanessa squeezes her eyes shut as tight as she possibly can, trying to push away any and all thoughts of Brooke so that she can conjure an anonymous woman, one who won’t make her think of Brooke and the way she’d left Vanessa a mess in her dream. 

Vanessa’s successful, at least partially. Does it stop her from accidentally letting Brooke’s name slip from her lips as she comes, all shaking and trembling with her hands fisting in the sheets? 

Not exactly. 

She’s gonna need a lot of coffee to get through the morning. 

* * *

“Did you call this early morning meeting just to zone out the entire time?”

“Hmm?” Brooke looks up at Detox’s accusatory expression over her coffee, trying desperately to remember what she’d asked her earlier in the conversation so that she can keep it going. 

It doesn’t come to her, not when all she can think of is pulling Vanessa close and-

“You didn’t eat those cookies I gave you last week during breakfast, did you?” Detox’s face turns worried. “Because those weren’t regular cookies, they were special cookies, if you know what I mean, and if I’m accidentally an accomplice in having you show up at work high as a kite-”

“I didn’t eat the edibles this morning, Detox.” Brooke rolls her eyes and even Nina lets out a laugh at that. “I’m not that stupid.” 

Though Detox only shrugs. “I’m just checking. It’s just that you’re usually the one to keep us on track while Nina and I try and talk about more interesting things than work.”

Nina nods. “True. And today, we’ve been trying to rank the sandwiches served by the deli downstairs and you haven’t stopped us even once.” 

“I’m so glad that both of you are aware of just how distracted you get during morning meetings.” Brooke snorts when Detox and Nina high five each other. “Now focus. We need to finish the plan before the afternoon.”

“Nice try.” Detox leans forward in her seat before taking a loud sip of her drink. “You’re still thinking about the morning sex, huh?”

“What?” Brooke wrinkles her nose when Detox and Nina high five a second time. “What are you talking about?”

“The dazed yet dreamy look in your eyes? The complete lack of attention to anything around you?” Nina giggles, actually giggles. “Someone clearly had a good time last night. And this morning.”

“I did not- _hey._ ” Brooke huffs, and she can already feel a blush rising on her face even though their words aren’t true, not in the least. 

Because she knows what - or who - is responsible for her complete lack of attention. Not that she wants to focus on the fact too much. Even though she can still smell Vanessa’s shampoo, hear the way she’d gasped when they’d deepened the kiss-

“Are you even listening? See?” Detox lets out a laugh, nudging Nina’s side, the two of them looking equally entertained. “Your girl fucked you good last night, B.”

“You don’t even know the half of it.” The soft mutter under her breath is heard by Nina and Detox regardless, the two of them letting out whoops that make Brooke want to drop her head onto her desk.

“Can’t wait to meet her and see just how whipped you are in real life. It’s going to be hilarious.” Nina snickers, and it makes Brooke want to groan.

“Shut up.”

It’s a good thing that neither her or Vanessa are dating other people while faking a relationship, because Brooke truly doesn’t know how she’d be able to kiss another person after the kiss with Vanessa last night. Brooke’s not a big believer in cosmic entities or fate or karma or everything happening for a reason, but she can feel it. The weird way the kiss had worked, the way that Brooke had never wanted it to end.

An insane concept, god forbid. 

Except that she’s still thinking about it at work a whole day later, enough for her coworkers to notice. Brooke’s never the one to be hung up over someone, especially someone who she’s not actually dating. But it’s only because of the kiss being so good - it had caught her off guard at the time, that’s all. 

She’ll be better prepared for the next one. 

* * *

Brooke’s eyes keep flitting to her phone screen all day, because she’s sure that the vibe between her and Vanessa is going to feel strange, or slightly off after their practice kiss. That their hoax will be ruined because they’re both going to start thinking about the kiss too much, about how right it had felt, but-

It had just been a kiss. Just a kiss. 

Brooke doesn’t get hung up over people, and she’s not going to let herself get that way now. 

But then Vanessa sends her a meme over text and it makes Brooke crack up at her desk when she’s supposed to be working. It feels a little bit more normal, Vanessa texting her silly things like she always does, as if they don’t need to talk about their kiss, because they don’t. Because this is the way that they’re supposed to be. 

Vanessa pops into her office at lunchtime, the same way that she’s gotten used to doing so over the past few weeks. The grin on her face turns into a frown when she sees Brooke typing away at her computer. “You still working?” 

“Deadline at two. Gotta work through lunch today, sadly.” Brooke looks up from her screen and has to hold back a laugh at the pout on Vanessa’s face. “Why, would you rather help me get it done and work through lunch, too?”

Vanessa scrunches her face, steps back from the computer. “No, thanks. I don’t know shit about architecture.”

“This are more just preliminary blueprints for-”

“Gross. Zzzz.” Vanessa drops one of the takeout bags beside Brooke. “I’ll leave this for you in peace. Have fun, nerd.”

“You bought me lunch?” Brooke’s heart swells, and she can’t keep the smile off her face because of course she’d forgotten to pack one this morning, and hasn’t had time during her lunch break so far to go to the cafeteria, meaning that she hasn’t been planning on eating. 

Though Vanessa’s taken care of it without even knowing any of that and she seems to know it, judging by the way she preens. “Told you I’d be a good fake girlfriend.” 

“You’ve never said anything of the sort.” Brooke snorts. “And don’t think I missed the part where you called me a nerd.”

“Am I wrong, though?” 

“Which one of the two of us is more obsessed with Pokémon?” Brooke counters, leaning forward on her desk, and Vanessa splutters. 

“No idea what you’re talking about. On that note, have fun with your boring spreadsheets.” Vanessa turns on her heels, but pauses at the door. “Don’t overwork yourself too hard, or you may be too tired for the next date I got planned.”

Brooke raises an eyebrow. “What, are we going to another fitness class or something?”

“Nah. You’re gonna have to deal with my excitement level at a Christmas market this weekend. I’m tired for you already.” 

* * *

Vanessa’s warning is fitting, something Brooke quickly realizes a few days later once they enter the gates of the Christmas market. 

“The stalls. The stalls! And there’s mulled wine, we gotta get mulled wine because I wanna get lit on Christmas spirit.” Vanessa’s mitten clad hand tugs Brooke into the thick of the market, the lights sparking overhead illuminating the delighted look in Vanessa’s eyes. 

“Slow down, we gotta choose somewhere to start first.” Brooke catches her breath when Vanessa momentarily pauses, her gaze on a stall above them. 

“Fudge? Can we get fudge?” The wide eyes paired with the slight pout on Vanessa’s lips is adorable, Brooke has to admit. 

“Good place to start as any, I guess.”

Vanessa squeals before Brooke’s even finished her sentence, grabbing her hand and tugging her to the fudge display. She looks over at Brooke, her face morphing into a faux serious expression as they wait in line. 

“Alright, listen. This is how we strategize for fudge. We both get different flavours then split them so we can each have at least two. Got it?”

Brooke bumps her shoulder lightly. “Didn’t know you were so passionate about fudge.”

Vanessa, for her part, is shameless. “I got my priorities straight.”

“Straight, huh?”

“You know what I mean.”

Though the market is fun, the food and drinks and stalls and slight chill outside making their breath visible in the cool air. They share a giant bag of popcorn, sip on mulled wine until they’re giggling and their cheeks are all rosy. Brooke lets Vanessa tug on her hand, pull her around to wherever she wants to go - Brooke’s having enough fun watching Vanessa’s excitement to everything. 

Their last stop is the market’s giant Christmas tree, one that both of them have to crane their necks up to look at. Brooke can’t help the way she throws an arm around Vanessa, pulls her into her side. Vanessa leans her head on her shoulder, the wool of her beanie tickling Brooke’s neck, but she doesn’t mind. Because Vanessa is nice and warm and comfortable, and fits into her side perfectly, somehow. 

“It’s huge.” Brooke can’t keep the awe out of her voice. She’s come to the market before, with her parents as a kid and with friends and colleagues as she’s gotten older, but the massive tree that seems to go up to the sky twinkling in so many lights never fails to take her breath away. 

Vanessa lets out a giggle beside her. “That’s what she said.” 

Brooke pulls back for a second, shooting Vanessa a look. “Are you twelve?”

“Maybe.” Vanessa’s holding back another laugh and Brooke’s about to retort, maybe one up her with a joke of her own, when a woman taps her shoulder. 

“Hi, I was wondering if one of you would be able to take a picture of my husband and I in front of the tree?” The lady is barely done her sentence before Vanessa’s disentangling herself from Brooke’s grip, reaching out to grab the woman’s phone. 

“On it.” Vanessa holds up the phone, throws an encouraging smile towards the couple, already in a formal prom-like pose. “Say cheddar!”

“Isn’t it cheese?” Brooke can’t help but interject as Vanessa snaps the photos, grinning when Vanessa looks over and sticks her tongue out. 

“Cheese is boring.”

“You’re boring.”

“That’s a lie and you know it.” Vanessa snaps the final picture, handing the phone back to the woman. “Here you go.”

“Thank you, dear.” The woman pats Vanessa’s shoulder. “Would you like us to take one of you and your girlfriend, too?”

Vanessa blinks in surprise and Brooke feels herself freeze too, though the woman is unfazed, waiting for their answer. 

Vanessa is the first one to break the silence. “Sure, why not? C’mere, B.” 

“How do you wanna do it? Arms around each other? A prom pose?” Brooke sidles up to Vanessa, intent on wrapping her arm around her again, but Vanessa sidesteps her, grinning. 

“I got a better idea. Get your face down here.” Vanessa steps up on her tiptoes, wraps her arms around Brooke’s neck and pulls her in for another kiss. 

It’s not as startling as their first kiss, partly because Brooke’s been exposed to it before, and braces for it this time. But Vanessa’s lips are still soft, still make Brooke want to pull her closer, even after the camera flashes go off. Brooke tilts Vanessa back slightly, dipping her during the kiss and she can hear the lady let out an _aww._

“Alright, here you go, ladies.” The woman’s voice makes the two of them break apart, and Brooke still feels just as breathless, just as out of words to say as she did during their first kiss as the woman hands back the phone.”The two of you make an adorable couple. Don’t they, Rob?” 

The man beside her grunts but Brooke is barely paying attention to him, her gaze still focused on Vanessa and the way her cheeks are pink and her eyes are sparkling, and how she seems to look more and more beautiful the longer that Brooke knows her. 

“Thank you.” Vanessa’s voice is a squeak, and Brooke reaches down, grabs her hand. Squeezes it. 

Vanessa squeezes back, and it’s reassuring. 

“We’ll leave you two be. Enjoy your evening!” The lady and her husband are leaving with twin waves, and Brooke waves back absentmindedly, more focused on looking at the pictures on the phone screen between them. 

“Now there’s the winning shot. We’re killing this.” 

* * *

_Instagram photo by @vanessavanjie. Tagged: @bhytes. Description: Brooke tilting Vanessa back in a fairytale kiss, surrounded by a giant Christmas tree and twinkling lights amidst a crowd of other marketgoers. Caption: tis the season._


	5. chapter five

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A’keria raises an eyebrow. “You got a girl to impress now. You’re telling me you’re gonna show up in something subpar?”
> 
> Vanessa pauses. “You think she’s gonna care?” She knows that Brooke will pay attention to what she’s wearing, but they’re not actually dating, which takes a bit of the pressure off-
> 
> A’keria gives her a look. “You gotta impress her, Vanj. How else you gonna keep her?” 
> 
> “I’m keeping her because she loves my dazzling personality.” Vanessa barely finishes her sentence before Silky joins them, sliding over in her chair and letting out a snort. 
> 
> “Dazzling? Who said that?”
> 
> “Bitch-”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter five! Thank you SO much for all the kind words on this story, every review makes me so freaking happy. To the few of you who sent me tumblr messages, please know that those MADE MY DAY and I love you. If you're reading this story and supporting it, you're the best, so thank you. 💖 Sorry for being slightly late on uploading this week! Life is busy, also I got a cat and I spent the time that I COULD be writing by playing with her. Whoops? Thank you writ for being the most wonderful beta and friend, I love you binch.

The invitation pops up in Vanessa’s mailbox at the same time as everyone else’s in the office, the _dings_ of the email notifications echoing throughout the room. 

Silky’s the first one in their collection of cubicles to let out a screech. “Holiday party time, bitches!”

The entire office already RSVP’ed to the save-the-dates sent out by corporate weeks ago, because no one with at least half a brain misses the office holiday party, no ma’am. Not an event that’s considered to be one of legends, with at least two fights and four new couples emerging from the wreckage every year. Vanessa fondly remembers December 2016, when their CEO had been found in a utility closet with not only his secretary, but with his secretary’s assistant, too. And then there had been 2018, where Scarlet and Ariel had showed up in the same sparkly dress and had subsequent twin banshee-screech-worthy meltdowns. The open bar is known to lead to more than expected tomfoolery, and Vanessa always has a suspicion that the punch gets even more spiked than everyone realizes. 

All in all? She’s excited for this year’s party. 

A’keria rolls her chair over until she’s beside Vanessa. “So, what are you gonna wear?”

“Hell if I know.” Vanessa shrugs. “You know I don’t choose my outfits until the night before.”

A’keria raises an eyebrow. “You got a girl to impress now. You’re telling me you’re gonna show up in something subpar?”

Vanessa pauses. “You think she’s gonna care?” She knows that Brooke will pay attention to what she’s wearing, but they’re not _actually_ dating, which takes a bit of the pressure off-

A’keria gives her a look. “You gotta impress her, Vanj. How else you gonna keep her?” 

“I’m keeping her because she loves my dazzling personality.” Vanessa barely finishes her sentence before Silky joins them, sliding over in her chair and letting out a snort. 

“Dazzling? Who said that?”

“ _Bitch-”_

A’keria waves a hand in between them before Vanessa can get fired up. “You still need to knock her damn socks off. Make her wanna drag you back home before you even get to the party.”

“Why?”

“You really asking why? You don’t want your blondie to see you and wanna rail the shit outta you ‘cause of how good you look?” 

Vanessa wrinkles her nose at A’keria’s wording. “Crude.”

“You know I’m right. We going shopping after work tonight. Partially ‘cause I need to find a good dress ‘cause I’m inviting Ryland and I ain’t gonna look shitty in front of him.” A’keria grins and Vanessa rolls her eyes, letting out a snort. 

“I would’ve come anyway, you know.” 

A’keria shrugs. “Yeah, but where’s the fun in that?” 

“Hey, what about me, hoes?” Y’all ain’t gonna ask me to come along?” Silky’s pouting, looking between the two of them, and A’keria lets out a scoff. 

“We do everything together anyway, Silk. You already know the invitation includes your dumb ass.” 

Vanessa tunes out their bickering as she turns back to her computer monitor, checking the time and mentally calculating the hours until work is over. Maybe shopping will be good. Getting a nice dress, seeing Brooke’s reaction. Sure, they’re not together for real, but Vanessa still hasn’t forgotten the kiss - how can she? 

She remembers the way Brooke had pulled her closer, deepened the kiss. How it had felt so sharp, so tangible, how she’d somehow felt so much more kissing Brooke than she did even with her last ex-girlfriend. 

Even if there’s nothing between her and Brooke, even if they’re just fake dating, it’s still a nice feeling that she can make Brooke react that way. That she feels it too. 

And so what if Vanessa maybe wants to make it happen again? She’s not going to be one to stand in the way of the universe, that’s for sure.

* * *

_VVM: so we going together to the shindig tomorrow or what?_

_BLH: I’d sure hope so_

_BLH: unless you got another lady you’re trying to fake romance_

_VVM: BITCH_

_VVM: u know u the only one i wanna have as my fake gf_

_VVM: true fake gf material_

_BLH: wow. I’m honoured, truly_

_BLH: never have more romantic words been spoken_

_VVM: HEY I’m romantic af and you know it_

_BLH: that I do_

_BLH: haven’t forgotten the time where you bawled over that Nicholas Sparks movie_

_VVM: THEY WERE MEANT TO BE TOGETHER_

_BLH: incredible_

* * *

Brooke arrives at the holiday party at half past seven, the venue mostly empty save for a couple of people already taking up residence by the open bar. She doesn’t mind - she likes being early, likes being at a place with time to kill rather than having to rush to get there and feel out of control. It gives her an opportunity to catch her bearings, to acclimatize herself while sipping on some white wine to pass the time. 

Vanessa hasn’t told Brooke what she’s wearing yet, only texting her that she should be prepared to have her _‘socks knocked off.’_ Knowing Vanessa, Brooke won’t be surprised if she shows up wearing something like one of those inflatable dinosaur costumes, just to get a reaction out of Brooke and make her crack up. Either way, she’s excited to have Vanessa on her arm, to show her off. To confirm all the rumours swirling around the office that she’s finally dating someone. 

Even though technically, she’s not. 

Brooke’s on her second glass of white when Detox slides onto the barstool beside her, giving her an appreciative once over. “What kind of foxy look is this?”

“What, a girl can’t wear a jumpsuit once in awhile?” The high neck, sleeveless crimson outfit pairs perfectly with Brooke’s lipstick, and she knows that she looks damn good in it. 

“Oh, she can. You look great, albeit a bit milf-ish.” Detox presses her lips together to hold in a smile. “Like you’re gonna ask me to go for drinks after your kid’s soccer game.”

“In your dreams.” Brooke rolls her eyes, giving Detox a light shove, though she can’t help but smile either. “You look good, too.”

“Yeah? Not too slutty?” Detox peeks over her own shoulder, looking at the dip of her dress. 

Brooke leans back on her stool, giving Detox a once over. “I mean, it wouldn’t hurt for once to maybe wear something backless that doesn’t reach your asscrack.” 

Detox lets out a screech, reaching over to swat at Brooke’s arm, and she leans out of the way just in time, grinning. “Though you _do_ have the back for it.” 

“You’re damn right I do.” Detox pouts. She crosses her legs, and the slit in her dress inches ever so slightly higher, revealing more of her bare legs. 

Brooke reaches out to pat her shoulder. “Lemme get you a drink and make you feel better.” 

“It’s an open bar, you dolt-”

“Red? White? A Bloody Mary?”

Detox huffs. “Fine. A Bloody Mary.”

“I truly know you so well, huh?” Brooke winks at Detox before signalling to the bartender for more drinks. 

“We’ve known each other for years, dumbass.” Detox looks around the room before pausing, suddenly nudging Brooke’s side and nearly making her spill her wine. “Look who it is.”

Maybe it’s the fact that Brooke hasn’t had a sip of her wine in at least a few minutes, but she can feel her mouth run dry at who’s just walked in the door. 

Vanessa is a vision, the reflections from the sparkles on her fringe dress lighting up the floor around her. She flips her high ponytail over her shoulder as she looks around the room, her face breaking into a slow smile as she locks eyes with Brooke.

Brooke can’t help it - she winks at her, revelling in the look of surprise that takes over Vanessa’s face, the slight stutter in her step. But Vanessa gets over it quickly, sidling up to her and pressing into her side when Brooke wraps an arm around her waist. 

“Don’t you look beautiful?” Brooke murmurs the words soft enough that Vanessa hears them, shivers, but loud enough that Detox hears them too, her eyebrows raising as she takes a sip of her drink. 

“Pretty smoking yourself.” Vanessa’s eyes trail over Brooke’s form appreciatively, and Brooke doesn’t care if the attention is fake - it’s nice, feeling admired under Vanessa’s gaze. 

“Um, hello? Lesbians? Before the two of you start fucking at this bar?” Detox waves a hand between the two of them, but Brooke keeps her arm around Vanessa’s waist when they turn towards her. 

“Bi, actually-”

“Either way.” Detox slips off her bar stool, sticks a hand out towards Vanessa. “Hi. Detox. Best friend. Quick question - how the fuck did you get Brooke to actually go out with you? I’ve never seen this one actually date anyone and let me tell you, I didn’t believe that she snagged a boo until seeing this scene right now in front of me.” 

Vanessa laughs, actually laughs, and Brooke can tell she isn’t nervous meeting Detox. Because Detox’s ridiculousness is easy to warm up to, to get along with, and Brooke’s secretly glad for it. 

“I have my ways. Who can resist this?” 

Brooke snorts when Detox lets out a whistle, puts on a show of checking Vanessa out. “I mean, I can see why she was sold. Still is sold. She doesn’t shut up about you.”

“Really now?” Vanessa grins, turning towards Brooke, and she scoffs, because okay, an exaggeration on Detox’s part. 

“I do not-”

Detox nods. “Mhm! Waxes on and on-”

“Fuck off, you two.” Brooke scowls, and Vanessa pats her shoulder. The smile in Vanessa’s eyes is almost enough to make up for Brooke’s lost dignity. Almost.

“Gotta tell me later on all about what exactly you like to talk about. ‘Cause that’s news to me.” Vanessa looks smug and Brooke rolls her eyes, trails her fingers along Vanessa’s ribs. 

It’s enough to make Vanessa catch a breath, look at her while biting her lip, and helps Brooke build back her confidence. She’s still got this. 

“Anyways.” Detox sits back down on her stool, crossing her legs. “You’re HR, right? Were you one of the people who had to do that sex ed info session for the accounting department because they had an STD outbreak spread between them? Because that was fucking hilarious to hear about.”

Brooke wrinkles her nose. “Ew. What?”

“The dumb bitches all got syphilis, god bless them.” Vanessa rolls her eyes. “Let me tell you something. I worked at a sex-ed centre in college and didn’t think that I’d have to pull those pamphlets out again. But guess what, I did! For a bunch of employees reaching middle age who didn’t seem to know how to use condoms!” 

“Did you have to pull out a banana and everything?” Detox snickers. “Because that’s all I remember from high school.”

“You bet. And I did _not_ end up eating that banana at lunch that day.” Vanessa mimes throwing up, and Brooke lets out a groan. 

“You’re so ridiculous.”

“And yet you’re still tapping this.”

Detox lets out a cackle, one that makes the groups of people around them at the bar turn to look towards them. Though Detox doesn’t seem to care, instead reaching her hand out to high five Vanessa, who returns it without hesitation. Their twin guffaws make Brooke crack up with them, despite how loud they’re being and how much of a scene they’re making. 

It makes Brooke happy, the fact that Vanessa’s charisma is so effortless that she’s won Detox over immediately. Brooke has no doubt, really, that she’ll be the same way with Nina. And Courtney. And Steve. And every other friend of Brooke’s that she’ll meet. 

Because Vanessa seems the type to be able to charm them all. 

* * *

“I gotta go to the bathroom. Come with me?” Vanessa tugs on Brooke’s hand and she gets up to follow her through the crowds of people, watching as Vanessa’s ponytail swishes as she walks. 

Vanessa turns to face Brooke when the crowds lessen, thinning out the farther and farther that they get from the bar. “I like your work friends. They real sweet.” 

“They seemed to like you just as much. That bear hug from Nina is pretty standard, but I think she hugged you just a little tighter than anyone else.” Nina indeed had been delighted by Vanessa, laughing at all her jokes and even taking the time to exchange Instagrams with her. 

Nina had turned to her when Vanessa wasn’t looking, squeezing her arm and giving a thumbs up. A Nina stamp of approval. Not hard to get, because Nina’s kind and understanding and easy to win over, but it makes Brooke happy nonetheless, that her friends seem to support what’s happening between her and Vanessa. Or at least, what they assume is happening.

“All of them seemed surprised that you’re dating someone. You really don’t do that shit much, huh?” Vanessa’s expression is curious, like she wants to press for more, like she’s been holding back and waiting for the right opportunity to ask. 

Brooke gets the curiosity, she does. But she also doesn’t feel like unpacking it on the way to the bathroom. 

Not that Brooke has to say anything to prolong the conversation to a further time, because Vanessa suddenly tenses beside her, grabbing her hand. Brooke looks up and follows her line of vision, only to see that they’re being approached by a blonde with the plainest man on her arm that Brooke’s ever seen. 

“Vanessa!” The blonde’s voice is sickly sweet, and Brooke has to stop herself from making a face in response. She’s never really been a fan of too much sugar. “Fancy seeing you here.”

“It’s a holiday party for the company we both work for. Ain’t that surprising.” Vanessa sniffs, narrowing her eyes and Brooke can’t help but look at her in curiosity. 

Because, well, who’s the blonde? A past friend? A scorned ex? A shitty manager? Though she definitely doesn’t look like she can be a manager, on account of looking around twelve years old. 

“Still. _So_ nice to see you after so long. You’ve met Grant, right? He works in IT, we just got close after he had to fix the computer at my desk. Funny how those things go, huh? A total romance novel.” The blonde squeezes the guy’s hand, grinning up at him, and Brooke has to press her lips together to hold in a laugh. Vanessa doesn’t look like she’s feeling the same way, though, from the way her eyes begin to narrow.

“You already introduced us in the cafeteria once. And then outside my cubicle. I can learn a damn name.” Vanessa rolls her eyes, taking a step back until she’s pressed against Brooke. 

The blonde pauses, as if she’s only just noticed Brooke’s presence. “Who’s this? You’re not going to introduce me to…?” 

Vanessa huffs, grabs Brooke’s hand tighter. Brooke squeezes back. “This is Brooke. One of those big architectural project managers.”

Brooke’s surprised that Vanessa seems to have remembered exactly what her role is. Though by the way that the blonde’s eyebrows raise, it makes sense - Vanessa’s trying to impress her. 

“Also my girlfriend.”

The blonde’s mouth parts slightly in surprise. Grant, bless him, seems clueless towards any undertones of the conversation, giving a small wave towards Brooke and Vanessa. 

Though Brooke’s beginning to clue in a little, because the only reason the blonde would react this way would be if-

“Babe, this is Aquaria, an admin assistant for corporate. We dated for a bit.” Vanessa’s voice is blasé, nonchalant, as if trying to minimize whatever had existed between them. 

Ah. Excellent. 

It’s more entertaining, if anything, especially when Aquaria seems to sputter, trying to compose herself. “I didn’t know you were already dating again.”

Vanessa flips her hair over her shoulder. “I’ve moved on, don’t you worry.” She shuffles closer to Brooke, tightening her arm around her waist as if staking her claim. 

Brooke’s not sure if it’s part of her duty as a fake girlfriend, but she’s absolutely going to try and play it up with Vanessa. More for Aquaria’s reactions than anything else. So she throws an arm over Vanessa’s shoulder, presses a kiss to her hair. Tries to hold in a laugh when Aquaria blanches a bit. 

“That she has. We have fun, don’t we babe?” Brooke laces her voice with sickly sweet undertones, similar to the ones Aquaria had used when first approaching them. 

“That we do.” Vanessa smiles up at her, leaning up to press a kiss to her lips. 

Grant looks thrilled. Aquaria looks nauseous. And Brooke’s never seen anything funnier in her life. 

“Anyway, we gotta get going. We were heading to the bathroom before running into you. On that note? See ya!” Vanessa doesn’t give Aquaria a chance to respond, tugging on Brooke’s hand and dragging her in the direction of the bathroom. 

“Bye!” Brooke tosses the word over her shoulder and waves, letting out a snort when Grant waves back. Aquaria’s mouth is still open, and Brooke manages to hold in her laughter until after they close the bathroom door behind them. 

“Holy. Shit.” Brooke gasps, watching as Vanessa collapses against the wall. “What was that?”

“I shoulda told you she also works here. Deadass, though? I kinda forgot.” Vanessa snickers. “Too distracted by thoughts of you, I guess.” 

“Shut up, you goof.” Though it’s good natured as she says it, because Vanessa fully moving on through fake dating someone somehow makes complete sense, for her. “But seriously. Who put Barbie McDollface’s panties in a twist?”

“Honestly, she deserves it.” Vanessa rolls her eyes. “She ditched me as soon as she got bored. Fuck that.” 

Brooke raises an eyebrow. “And now she’s supposedly more entertained by that guy in the polo shirt?”

“She’s getting the limp dick of her dreams.” 

“Gross!”

“Tell me I’m wrong, though.” Vanessa grins, and honestly? Brooke really can’t. 

She thinks back to Grant’s meticulously styled hair. The way his watch coordinated with his shirt. The way he seemed oblivious to any previous relationship drama between Vanessa and Aquaria. “I dunno. Grant looks kind of like a sweet puppy. Like he has absolutely no idea what’s going on, but is still happy to be here.” 

“Maybe he’ll be good for her.” Vanessa muses, as she taps her fingers on the bathroom counter. “She does need someone to balance out the crazy. I definitely didn’t do that for her.”

Brooke leans against the wall. “You need someone to balance out _your_ crazy. Is that where I come in?” 

“Bitch, you wish.” But Vanessa’s grinning too, not taking the words to heart. “Though glad I got you to hang around with, instead. You still a Barbie. Just taller.”

“Oh, is that why you chose me?” 

“You’ll never know. Now c’mon, I need another drink. Or maybe ten.”

* * *

“Dance with me.” Vanessa slurs, as she tugs on Brooke’s hand as she tries to pull her up from the table, largely unsuccessful in her attempts. It makes Brooke giggle. “It’s my song.”

“You said the last song was your song.” Okay, so maybe Brooke’s slurring a bit too. It’s not her fault that her medications make her a complete lightweight.

Maybe it had been a bad idea for Brooke to participate in the shot contest with Silky and Vanessa earlier in the night, but she’d wanted to win. And won she did, especially because now it’s been at last an hour and she hasn’t even gone to the bathroom to throw up yet.

“Pleaaaase?” The fake pout combined with the Oscar-worthy lip quiver on Vanessa’s face is enough for Brooke to hold her hands out, let Vanessa pull her up. Because there’s something about Vanessa that Brooke’s unable to deny at most times, but especially when she’s drunk.

“One dance. Only one dance.” Brooke tries to keep her voice stern though finds it difficult when Vanessa’s face breaks into beam, and she’s tugging Brooke past all the tables and onto the dance floor. 

Brooke normally finds holiday parties to be a great study of her coworkers. Everyone is just a little too smashed, a little too uninhibited in the moment to realize that they’ll be unable to look at each other in the eye come Monday morning. But today she feels like she’s joining them, because Vanessa’s singing her heart out to the song blaring over the speakers and Brooke can’t resist letting out a giggle, grabbing Vanessa’s hand to pull her closer, spin her around. The fringe on Vanessa’s dress flares out all around her, the sparkles lighting up the dance floor and the sight is almost as beautiful as the way Vanessa’s eyes are sparkling, too. 

Vanessa throws her arms around Brooke’s neck, standing on her tiptoes so that she can pull Brooke in close. Brooke can smell her perfume, the way the scent is intoxicating - or maybe that’s just all the alcohol flowing in her system. She tugs Vanessa even closer until they’re flush up against each other, until their lips are inches apart just because she can. Because Vanessa’s lips part slightly, her eyes taking on a mischievous gleam. 

“We’re such good actors.” She has to whisper the words right by Vanessa’s ear to be heard over the music, and it’s clear Vanessa hears them, by the way she nods, looks down at Brooke’s lips. 

“ _So_ good.” 

Kissing Vanessa is easy, something that Brooke wants to keep doing over and over again. She pulls back, lets out a little laugh because the alcohol is making her hazy but then Vanessa giggles too before pulling her back in. 

“Extremely convincing.”

“Mhm. Now come back down here.” 

* * *

_Instagram story posted by @mizakeriachanel. Tagged: @vanessavanjie, @bhytes. Description: Vanessa and Brooke making out on the dance floor, while Brooke’s hand is definitely grabbing Vanessa’s butt. Caption: ‘Now THAT’s classy’_

* * *

Brooke’s glad that she’s sleeping over at Vanessa’s, that she had already given her an overnight bag to take home earlier in the day. Because the thought of going to her own apartment all the way up in midtown feels too far, too difficult to get to on her own. At least now she’s let Vanessa take the lead and take them both to her apartment, without having to worry too much about where they are. 

Vanessa had leaned against Brooke the entire Uber ride home, pressing little kisses to her neck, to her shoulder - light enough to feel barely there. Brooke had turned towards her, nuzzled her face in her hair and she’s still thinking about the little content noise that Vanessa had let out in response. 

Vanessa tugs her into the elevator once they reach her apartment building, backing her up against the mirrored wall. Her makeup is smudged around her eyes and her ponytail has several strands escaping from it but she looks happy, very happy. 

“Hi.” Vanessa rises on her tiptoes, putting her hands on the wall on either side of Brooke. 

“Hi to you, too.” Brooke smiles, reaching up to boop Vanessa’s nose, a smile that grows when Vanessa’s expression turns into a scowl. “Aww, don’t pout. Let me kiss it better.”

Vanessa grins again at that, reaching her arms around Brooke’s neck before-

“Wait. We ain’t in front of anyone anymore. We don’t gotta act.”

“True.” Brooke pauses, because Vanessa’s not wrong - they don’t have to pretend to be dating, they don’t have to fool anyone when they’re on their own. 

It’s a strange feeling. 

“One more kiss, though.” And just like that, giggly Vanessa is back, reaching up to press a kiss to her lips and Brooke almost wants to hold her to keep her in place because she fits there so perfectly. 

Vanessa only pulls back when the elevator _dings_ and the doors open to her floor. She takes a step back, and then another, before interlacing her fingers together. “C’mon. Let me show you my place.”


	6. chapter six

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Yeah.” Vanessa shrugs. “You can just tell when things aren’t gonna work, y’know? We didn’t gel the best.”
> 
> “What was the final straw?”
> 
> “Probably something stupid. We were bickering way too much. It just didn’t feel the way it should.” 
> 
> Vanessa thinks back to it - the way every little thing that Aquaria would do had started to annoy her, the same things that at the start of their relationship had been nothing but endearing. How she hadn’t wanted to stay in something that wasn’t the way it was supposed to be. 
> 
> Brooke, though, looks lost. “What didn’t feel the way it should?” 
> 
> “Y’know. Relationships. It wasn’t...it.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for all the sweet feedback and love for this fic! It truly brightens up my day every time there's a new review or a new tumblr message and I can't thank you all enough for taking the time to read this fic, you're all the best 💖 Enjoy chapter six!

Vanessa can’t help but feel a little self conscious letting Brooke into her apartment as they start to sober up, watching as she takes a look around. They’ve only hung out at Brooke’s place so far, a place that is far bigger and more spacious than Vanessa’s and is also not shared with a roommate, and feels overall more impressive. Vanessa has Kahanna for a roommate, who’s just a _little_ too noisy when she has her boyfriend over and sings way too loud in the shower. Though the apartment is in a great location, at least, which is one of the reasons why Vanessa hasn’t started looking for other places just yet. That, and the fact that her building is rent-controlled. She can put up with Kahanna’s terrible singing for a little while longer. Except Kahanna doesn’t seem to be anywhere in sight tonight, a fact that Vanessa is grateful for, because it means that they don’t have to worry about disturbing her. 

“Riley!” 

Brooke lets out a squeal of delight when Riley comes bounding out of Vanessa’s room, crouching on her knees so that she can properly pet him. Vanessa has to hold in an _aw_ \- Brooke hasn’t met her dog before tonight, only seen him in the various pictures that Vanessa likes to pull out. Despite that, it’s clear Brooke is an animal person, along with someone that Riley is beginning to like already. 

Her dog is a good judge of character, one she trusts - any ex girlfriends that Riley hasn’t liked always turned out to be shitty. But he’s a fan of Brooke, from the way he’s trying to climb onto her lap, licking her face. Brooke, for her part, is grinning ear to ear, cooing as she pets him. It’s a contrast from her sleek jumpsuit, her bold makeup, her long waves tosses over her shoulder. Vanessa’s never seen her more beautiful. 

“C’mon.” Vanessa taps Brooke’s shoulder, gestures towards her room. “Let’s get this makeup off, get changed. This dress is too damn tight. Riley’s gonna follow us.”

Brooke traces her fingers along the frames up on the walls once they enter Vanessa’s room. There’s pictures of her and A’keria and Silky, some of her with her mom, others from past travels and even some from her college days.

Brooke pauses at one of a preteen Vanessa holding Riley as a puppy. “Jesus, how long have you had him?”

“Since he was a baby. He’s old as shit now. Got doggy arthritis and everything.”

“Poor baby.” Brooke couches down, pats the top of Riley’s head for good measure. She pulls her pyjamas out of her overnight bag, pauses as Vanessa grabs some of her own from her dresser. “Can I change in here? Or would you rather I change in the bathroom? I don’t mind either way, but…”

Oh. Right. 

They’re not actually together, and they haven’t exactly reached that couple level of comfort. But then again, Vanessa changes in front of Silky and A’keria all the time without giving it a second thought, when they’re about to go out for the night. This really isn’t any different from that. 

So, Vanessa just shrugs. “However you feel more comfortable. I don’t mind either way. I know you already stare at my ass even when it’s clothed.” 

Brooke gasps. “Hey! I do _not-”_

Vanessa ducks out of the way before Brooke throws her rolled up pyjamas at her, letting out a snicker. But it helps to break the slight tension that had started to build up, makes things more comfortable. 

Vanessa tosses Brooke’s pyjamas back at her. “Change here. Promise not to peek at your boobs.” 

“Too late. I know you already do.”

They camp out on the couch once they’ve changed and are bare faced, piling blankets from Vanessa’s bed on top of themselves. It’s late but Vanessa’s not tired, not really. Maybe it’s the adrenaline from dancing all night, the fact that neither of them are that tipsy anymore. Vanessa pulls the blankets up to her chin, looks up at Brooke. She’s content and doesn’t hesitate in smiling back down at Vanessa, a soft smile that reaches her eyes and one that Vanessa’s not sure she would have seen months ago, before they started all of this. 

“Tonight was fun.” 

“Yeah.” Vanessa grins, leaning her head back against the couch. “I’m glad we did that together.”

“Me too.” Brooke nods, pulling the covers up over herself, too. “I think my favourite part had to be Aquaria, though. Never seen anyone look that shocked in their lives.”

Vanessa lets out a snicker. “Honestly, I feel kinda bad now. Our breakup wasn’t even that shitty, it was mutual.” 

“Yeah?” Brooke shifts so that she’s resting on her side, facing Vanessa. 

“Yeah.” Vanessa shrugs. “You can just tell when things aren’t gonna work, y’know? We didn’t gel the best.”

“What was the final straw?”

“Probably something stupid. We were bickering way too much. It just didn’t feel the way it should.” 

Vanessa thinks back to it - the way every little thing that Aquaria would do had started to annoy her, the same things that at the start of their relationship had been nothing but endearing. How she hadn’t wanted to stay in something that wasn’t the way it was supposed to be. 

Brooke, though, looks lost. “What didn’t feel the way it should?” 

“Y’know. Relationships. It wasn’t... _it.”_ Vanessa pulls her feet up onto the couch, snuggles herself in some more as she tries to come up with the words to explain. “I don’t want something that doesn’t feel the way happy couples say that it does. All those butterflies, all the love that’s supposed to fill up your heart and make you wanna burst and all that shit.”

Sue her, she wants it. She wants that fairytale romance, she wants a soulmate the way Pam on _The Office_ had said Jim was hers. She wants her person, a ride or die who makes her heart flip flop no matter how long they’re together for.

Brooke, though, doesn’t look convinced. “I think you’re watching too many rom coms. Does that even happen?”

Vanessa scoffs, because of _course_ it does. “Uh, yeah. If you play your cards right, if you find the right person.”

She thinks of her friend Alexis, the way her and her boyfriend had gotten engaged in a year because they just _knew._ The way they’re still head over heels for one another, years later, because they’re each other’s person.

Vanessa wants that immediate spark, that fire burning bright, because her own past relationships had been more of a withering candle reaching the end of its life. 

“Those are high expectations to put on a potential partner.” Brooke raises an eyebrow. “What if someone doesn’t meet that?”

“Then I ain’t staying with their ass.” Vanessa shrugs. “Simple as that.” 

Vanessa’s not going to waste her time if it doesn’t feel right because there’s no point, not if it won’t lead to what she ultimately wants. It’s not fair to partners, either, if she knows it’s not gonna work. 

“Damn, you’re harsh.” Brooke lets out a little laugh. “Hope you won’t kick my butt to the curb like that.”

“You’re a different case, blondie. I’m keeping you around for a little while longer.” Vanessa leans her head on Brooke’s shoulder to illustrate her point, snuggles in closer when Brooke wraps an arm around her. 

Life really would be easier if she could just date Brooke. If their relationship could be real. Because Brooke is comfortable, Brooke gets her already. Vanessa doesn’t have to worry about appearing a certain way to Brooke because their relationship is fake, and it takes a bit of the pressure off. A catch 22, she supposes. The benefits of faking a relationship that they’ll never be able to actually have in the first place. 

Vanessa’s sure that that things wouldn’t go as smoothly if her and Brooke were dating for real. That there would be too much pressure, that they’d both find things to get irritated over. That dating wouldn’t even happen in the first place, because they’re from completely different departments and out of each other’s circles. Or at least, _were_ out of each other’s circles. Not anymore. 

Though it’s safe to say that she’d never even have Brooke’s friendship if it weren’t for this fake dating business. And that, in itself, is something she’s grateful to have now. 

“What about you? You’re chronically single like I am.” Vanessa shifts a little so that she can look up at Brooke. “What’s your reason?” 

Brooke shrugs, fiddling a bit with the hem of her sweater. “I dunno.”

“Yeah, you do.”

“I just…” 

Brooke pauses, looking down at Vanessa, and Vanessa can see the indecision in her eyes, as if she’s deciding to tell her. She reaches out, squeezes Brooke’s arm to show that she’s listening, but also because she really wants to know. 

“I just don’t see the point. Like, happily ever after isn’t a thing. It doesn’t work out. People in a relationship are either going to break up or get married and become unhappy and hate their lives for it. It’s always miserable.” Brooke lets out a breath, runs a hand through her hair. 

Vanessa has to fight to keep her face from betraying any emotion, because it’s a different way of thinking from how she sees the world herself. Does Brooke really think that relationships always end up miserable? 

“Don’t look at me like that.” Brooke mutters, and Vanessa flashes a sheepish smile, because she’s clearly not as good as hiding her emotions as she thinks. 

“I’m not. Wanna talk about it, though? I’m here to listen.” 

Brooke looks like she absolutely does _not_ want to talk about it, though takes a deep breath nonetheless. “I dunno. My parents were the type to stay together...even when they shouldn’t have. All about keeping up appearances, y’know? Because they couldn’t get divorced, no way, because what would people even say at church and how would they explain it to the kids?” She lets out a bitter laugh. “It would have been better, though. Not having the constant fighting and being stuck in the middle and us kids feeling like we had to be the grownups.” 

Vanessa reaches out, squeezes Brooke’s hand. She doesn’t push, waits for Brooke to continue. She can tell there’s more by the way that Brooke fiddles with the blanket. 

“They finally separated once us kids were in our mid twenties, already moved out and living our own lives. And it was like a switch flipped for my mom. She became so much happier, she started doing the things that _she_ wanted to do that my father wouldn’t let her. She could finally live for herself. She stopped thinking so narrowly, too, only came around to accepting me once my dad was gone and they stopped feeding off of each other.” 

Brooke pulls out her phone, flips through her camera roll. The picture Brooke stops at is of her and her mom, who is at least two heads shorter but is hugging her with both arms, the love clear in her face. 

“You guys look real close.” Vanessa looks at the woman’s curls, the way they’re the same as Brooke’s hair when she doesn’t style it. “I love it.”

Brooke has a small smile playing on her face. “We are now. But only after she started to become her own person again, not tied down to anyone.”

“What about friends? Other people you know in relationships? Aren’t they a little bit more happy than your parents were?” Because parents aren’t the only people that act as relationship models. Vanessa knows - hers were never together in front of her, either. 

Brooke, though, shrugs. “Most of them have found long term partners by now, settling into domesticity and all that. But it still feels so convoluted, like they’re always complaining and always have a bone to pick about their boyfriend or girlfriend or fiancé or whomever, because there’s always trouble in paradise. Always. It’s never paradise. Why not just be by yourself and do things the way you want, without anyone else ruining it?”

Vanessa can kinda see the point. Brooke’s fiercely independent, living on her own and following her own rules and feeling comfortable with it. Throwing someone else into the mix means that Brooke would have to compromise - something that Vanessa is willing to do in relationships, but that Brooke clearly isn’t. 

At least Brooke knows it from the get go, and is saving potential girlfriends from heartbreak by never putting herself out there in the first place. 

Vanessa can’t help but think that it’s a little sad, though. “You focus only on the downsides of relationships, the parts that actually require work. But there’s positive shit, shit that makes you happy and makes you feel so comfortable. Things that you can get from someone else that you don’t get from being alone.”

Brooke raises an eyebrow, clearly not convinced. “Oh yeah? Like what?”

“Like coming home to someone who’s cooking dinner and joining in with them, catching up on your day. Or snuggling into someone’s side before falling asleep, the way you did the night before and the night before that, too, because their presence is comforting and makes the bed so much warmer.” Vanessa can’t help the wistful tone in her voice. It’s what she misses, about being in a relationship. The comfort. The closeness. She wants it again. 

“I got my cats for cuddling.” But even Brooke’s a little hesitant as she says it, and makes a face when Vanessa cracks up. “Stop laughing! I’m not that pathetic, I swear.”

“I ain’t saying that.” Vanessa snuggles up against Brooke a little bit more. “I’m just saying your priorities are different. And that’s fine.”

Brooke’s hold around her tightens, her free hand drawing patterns on Vanessa’s shoulder. Vanessa looks up at her, at the set of her jaw and the way her eyes are so certain in their ways of thinking. “That being said? I got a feeling that eventually someone’s gonna come sweep you off your feet and end that cat lady nonsense. And lord help you when it does, cause you’ll be a goner.”

Vanessa can almost picture Brooke’s panic at falling head over heels for somebody, someone who makes her question her entire way of thinking. She kind of wants to be there with her phone out to film the ridiculousness. 

Brooke snorts. “Please. That’ll never happen. Though I’m gonna have fun watching you have your Notebook fantasy with some chick, when you finally find the _one_.” 

Vanessa huffs. “First of all, how’d you know The Notebook is my shit? Second of all, I’m gonna find her, I’m telling you. And I’ll know when she’s the right one ‘cause she’ll just fit.” 

Brooke reaches out to ruffle her hair. “What, like a puzzle piece or something?”

“Something like that.” 

For now, though, having Brooke around is a great substitute. Low pressure and expectations, but someone who Vanessa can spend time with, someone who enjoys her company, too. Someone who’s willing to open up to her and talk about things and overall? It’s nice. Vanessa likes it. 

She’ll take it until she gets her Notebook fantasy. 

* * *

Brooke’s morning alarm is akin to a nuclear reactor warning signal. 

“The fuck?” 

Vanessa had been having a great dream about becoming the captain of a cruise ship, spinning the giant steering wheel and all, before being rudely interrupted by the incessant beeping. She opens her eyes blearily, reaching a hand out towards the coffee table by the couch to press snooze on Brooke’s phone. The movement proves difficult, though, because a pair of arms around her waist and a face nuzzling into her neck keep her from being able to reach it. 

“Brooke?”

“Five more minutes, g’night.” And just like that, Brooke is back to snoring like a moose, tightening her grip around Vanessa’s waist in the process. 

Vanessa has to hold in a laugh. Who knew that Brooke’s a heavier sleeper than an elephant? She tries to shuffle in Brooke’s hold, running her fingers through Brooke’s hair when she lets out little mumbles of protest. She swipes for the phone and catches it before it falls off the coffee table, turning off the alarm. 

The time on the screen reads 6:30 am, and Vanessa groans. Jesus. 

They could both use a little bit more sleep, considering that they’d stayed up until 2:00 am just talking and talking and talking. Vanessa feels like she never runs out of things to tell Brooke, because Brooke always listens, never judges her. Asks her questions and makes her think even more. 

Vanessa loves listening to Brooke, too, watching the way she’s opening up more and more, so different from the way Brooke normally presents herself, because she trusts her. Vanessa doesn’t want to take the feeling for granted, because she knows that Brooke isn’t like this with everyone, even her friends whom she’s known forever. It’s something Vanessa’s glad to experience, glad to listen to do that she can know Brooke even better. 

But it does mean that sleep is tugging her back down, pulling her back towards more dreams with promises of high seas and spaceships and aliens. Vanessa, for one, is ready to go back to dreamland. And so she puts the phone down on the coffee table again, shuffles in Brooke’s grip until she’s lying down and snuggled up, and lets her brain run away back to sleep. 

* * *

The clock on the wall reads 9:00 am when Vanessa wakes up a second time. She finds that she’s not as restricted anymore, and so she wiggles her arms and twists around to face Brooke, who’s sitting crossed legged on the couch with a sheepish look on her face. 

“Hey, sleepyhead. Someone’s up and not snoring anymore.” Vanessa grins when she sees Brooke’s bedhead, the way her t shirt is falling off of one of her shoulders. “You’re like the world’s comfiest Snuggie when you sleep, y’know that?” 

“Sorry. I like burrowing when I sleep, apparently.” Brooke’s cheeks are pink as she tucks a lock of hair behind her ear, pulling her legs in closer towards her. 

“I ain’t complaining. It honestly was cute as hell.” Vanessa’s smile grows when Brooke blushes even more. “Is that how you sleep with your cats at home?” 

“Henry, yes. Apollo sometimes, because he’s moody. He likes the edge of the bed more.” 

The way that Brooke’s face slowly begins to light up as she talks about her cats makes Vanessa want to melt, because it’s so fucking cute. The softer, more rumpled sides of Brooke are ones that Vanessa’s starting to see more and more the longer that she knows her, and she hopes that it never changes. Because sure, while at work, Brooke looks like a corporate dreamboat - all pantsuits and clacking heels and meticulously styled hair. But this Brooke - the one with a loose topknot, the one who’s still rubbing sleep from her eyes with a soft smile on her face? She’s Vanessa’s new favourite. 

“Speaking of the cats, I gotta go home, check up on them eventually. I can’t leave them for more than a night.” Brooke’s voice is laced with regret, as if she doesn’t want to leave, and Vanessa notes that she doesn’t make any motions to get up. 

It makes Vanessa want to melt even more. She gets it, though, because she’s the same way with Riley. It’s another reason she doesn’t mind Kahanna as a roommate - she‘s always willing to take care of him, too.

She nudges Brooke. “Go check on your babies. They’re probably beside themselves that they haven’t seen you.” 

“Y’know, I- I haven’t slept over, like actually slept over at someone else’s place in ages. It really has been awhile.” Brooke’s cheeks are pink as she makes the admission. 

Vanessa can feel her own mouth open, because it’s not what she’s expected at all. “What, no one night stands for you?”

“Nah, I’ll usually just have people come to my place.” Brooke shrugs, and ah. Makes more sense. Of course Brooke is the type to keep an eye on her cats while getting a good lay at the same time. 

It makes Vanessa wonder what things would be like, if they’d met at a club. If they went home with each other. How their perceptions of each other would probably be so drastically different from how they are now. 

“Oh, so she's a homebody, huh?” Honestly, Vanessa would probably be the same way if she had a place like Brooke’s to come home to. She wouldn’t want to ever leave, either. 

Brooke rolls her eyes, but smiles nonetheless. “I like your place, though. Haven’t had a sleep that comfortable in awhile.”

“Yeah, ‘cause I was your personal teddy bear.” Vanessa can feel herself flushing, though she’d liked it last night, and definitely had slept as well as Brooke. 

“Didn’t see you complaining about it.” 

“Who’s complaining? I loved it.” Vanessa’s not gonna be one to lie to save any pride, not when she can have more nights snuggling with a human blanket. “This is what cavemen and shit used to do, to keep warm. Sleeping in packs.”

“Oh, so we’re cavemen now?” 

“If we snuggle hard enough.” 

Vanessa feels an arm sneak around her waist again, lets out a little shriek when Brooke pulls her back down to lie on the couch. “You’re ridiculous.”

Brooke’s hair is spread on the pillow around her like a blonde halo, as if she’s Rapunzel waiting for her sweet prince. Or princess. Vanessa reaches out, gently tugs on a lock, and goddamn. Because Brooke’s hair is of course as soft as it looks. 

“And yet, you’re the one KO-ing me onto the couch for more snuggles.” Not that Vanessa’s ever going to protest, not when Brooke is burying her face into Vanessa’s neck. 

“Shh, later. First, time for another nap before I leave.”


	7. chapter seven

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Did you eat half of this already?” Brooke holds back a laugh when she takes her first spoonful, looking down at the already picked-over bowl.
> 
> “Hey, I was hungry.” Vanessa shrugs. “Plus, this is the start of the free food A’keria is giving me for the bet. Figured I’d share it with my partner in crime.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter seven! Life is pretty hectic right now, and usually I have a few chapters in the bank ready to post. Currently I only have two - hopefully I'll have some time to write so that the chapters can keep coming out weekly. Thank you so, so much for all the support and love you guys have shown this fic. Every single comment makes me so happy, the fact that you're actually taking time out of your day to pay it some attention. I love it so, so much, and appreciate every single message. So, thank you <3 As usual, Writ continues to be the best beta and friend one could ask for.

“Here.” A’keria slams the burrito bowl down in front of Vanessa, and she can’t help but let out a delighted squeak. 

“God, I could get used to not having to pack my lunch. This month is gonna be lit.”

“Don’t get too used to it.” A’keria snorts as she mixes up her own bowl. “It’s only for a month, as the bet specified.” 

“Hey, I don’t care.” Vanessa’s voice is muffled as she tries to talk with a spoonful of the sweet, sweet rice, salsa, beans, chicken and vegetables in her mouth, but it’s hard. “Imma enjoy it.”

“Good, cause you earned it. Top ten things in my life that I didn’t need to see - you and Brooke practically fucking on the dance floor. Nasty hoes.” A’keria makes a face, and Vanessa grins right back at her while Silky snickers. 

“You just jealous you ain’t got a blonde skyscraper on your arm.” Part of Vanessa still can’t believe it, really. That Brooke’s willing to do this with her. Not that she’s complaining in the least. 

A’keria flips her hair over her shoulder. “I got my man, that’s all I need.” 

“He’d rock a blond look though, I ain’t gonna lie.” Silky’s statement makes Vanessa pause, try to picture it. 

“You’re right Silk, he totally would.” 

“Enough about my non blond man.” A’keria takes another bite of her own burrito bowl before handing it to Silky to share. “What do you want for tomorrow’s lunch?”

Vanessa has to stop herself from practically rubbing her hands together with glee. “Lord almighty, I did _not_ realize how great having my food brought to me would be. Pizza? Poutine? Gimme that unhealthy shit.”

Silky lets out a whistle. “Damn Vanj, you ain’t gonna try and look good for your girl?” 

“It’s called happy relationship weight. Imma get it, cause I’m happy. And in a relationship, and she thinks I look good anyway.” As if Vanessa actually is in one. But hey, why not? She’s allowed to enjoy poutine. 

“Brooke looks like she can lift you up with one hand, anyway.” A’keria’s tone is almost envious. Which is understandably, really, because her boyfriend is on the scrawny side. 

“Damn, I should get her to try that. Do you think she would?” Vanessa remembers when she’d been dating Kameron, who’d brought her to the gym often. Kameron had picked her up once and done squats at the same time, and Vanessa would be lying if she said it hadn’t been fucking hot. 

“You know her better than we do, Vanj. If she’d let you be a human barbell, go for it.” Silky shrugs. “I ain’t getting anyone to lift me anytime soon.”

“Imma go find her. Share some of this burrito bowl, ‘cause it’s technically her victory, too. Not that she knows about the bet.” Vanessa stands up, packing the burrito bowl up once more. It’s a bold faced lie, because Brooke _does_ know, though Silky and A’keria don’t need to know that. 

Brooke’s on the phone in her office when Vanessa pops by, the fingers of one of her hands pressing against her temple. She looks up, gives a small smile before turning back to the papers on her desk and ripping the person on the other end of the line a new one. 

“No, we can’t use the support beams from the other manufacturer. I don’t care if it’s going to lower costs - it’s not going to matter if the structures collapse in five years because of faulty material and we’re the ones who get sued. So, save it.” 

Vanessa plops down in the seat across from Brooke’s desk as quietly as she can, her eyes transfixed on Brooke. It’s kinda hot - Brooke yelling at someone on the other end of the line while completely maintaining composure. Not that Vanessa would ever admit it to her. 

“You need to liaise with the first company again, because they’re the ones that have been working well this whole time. I need the estimate from them by tomorrow.” With that, Brooke slams the phone down, letting out a sigh. She shoots a small smile towards Vanessa. “Hey.” 

Vanessa holds up the bowl. “Brought you some lunch, ‘cause I know your overworked ass ain’t eating.”

“I had a protein bar-”

“Rabbit food doesn’t count.” Vanessa pulls out the extra set of cutlery, lays it out for Brooke. She’s already had enough of the bowl, and Brooke looks tired enough that she needs as much as she can get. 

Brooke raises an eyebrow. “Isn’t rabbit food supposed to be what people call vegetables?” 

“You telling me any sane human is gonna eat a protein bar for sustenance?” Vanessa can’t even picture having them on the regular, so tasteless and quite unlike the chewy bars of her childhood. 

“Are you calling me nuts?” Brooke’s finally smiling, and it makes Vanessa’s heart grow when she sees it. She hates seeing how tired Brooke’s job makes her. 

“Remember, you took us to a spin class for a date.” Of course, Vanessa had enjoyed the shit out of it, but she’s not gonna mention that to Brooke. 

“I distinctly remember you having a great time.” 

“Maybe.”

“Did you eat half of this already?” Brooke holds back a laugh when she takes her first spoonful, looking down at the already picked-over bowl.

“Hey, I was hungry.” Vanessa shrugs. “Plus, this is the start of the free food A’keria is giving me for the bet. Figured I’d share it with my partner in crime.” 

“Well, that was very sweet of you.” Brooke’s voice is muffled by her bite, and the contrast is adorable from her blazer and the smell of her expensive perfume. 

Brooke’s an enigma, a person with so many facets that Vanessa is relishing in the chance to discover. The fact that Brooke’s willing to open up to her more and more is Vanessa’s favourite part of the bet, mostly because she’s an open book herself. Because what people see with her is what they get. 

“Gotta make sure you don’t waste away on me while yelling at your minions.” Vanessa snickers when Brooke makes a face at her. 

“They’re not minions. Just people who should know how to do their jobs.” Brooke sighs, gathering the papers on her desk and pushing them to the side. “Don’t go into management. The title isn’t worth it.”

“Can you imagine me trying to get people to do shit? It would be a whole lotta yelling.” Vanessa tries to picture herself at a desk like Brooke’s, having to spearhead projects and be responsible for them. At least she’d get to wear a power suit. 

“You’d be good at it, though. You have charisma, the kind that most people don’t and the kind that can’t be bought.” Brooke takes another bite of the bowl. “Dang, this is good.”

Vanessa raises a skeptical brow. “What do you mean, charisma?” She’s just her natural dumbass self, which pays off sometimes. 

“I mean, you convinced me to fake date you thirty or so seconds after introducing yourself. I’d say that’s pretty impressive.”

Vanessa snickers as she leans back in her seat, resisting the urge to lift her feet up onto the chair. “True.” 

It’s funny to think back to that day months ago, when Vanessa had barged into Brooke’s office, convinced she’d be able to get her to agree with no evidence to back her up aside from sheer dumb confidence. Though it had worked by some miracle, something that still surprises Vanessa every now and then - and she’s sure that it’s the same for Brooke, too. 

Brooke lets out a contented sigh when she finishes the bowl, pushing it away from her on the desk. “So, are you going to share all of your lunches with me from now on?” 

Vanessa doesn’t miss a beat. “Why, Miss Hytes, are you asking me to lunch for the next twenty nine days?”

Brooke rolls her eyes, but grins nonetheless. “Only if the food is good.”

“You can bet on that.” 

* * *

Brooke really, really doesn’t want to go out. 

It’s a Friday, she’s had a long week. Really, all she wants to do is curl up on the couch with her cats. 

But Nina’s birthday only comes once a year, and she’s a good friend, and so she has to choose a dress from her closet even though pyjamas sound like an infinitely comfier option right now. 

The buzzing from her phone on her bed distracts her from her closet dilemma, and so she hangs the dresses in her arms back up in favour of checking her texts. 

_VVM: Kahanna is singing along to the radio_

_VVM: AND RILEY IS DUETING WITH HER_

_VVM: we bout to get complaints from the neighbours at any moment but this shit is hilarious_

_BLH: Omg. Send me a video_

The resulting video from Vanessa makes Brooke crack up, because Riley’s spinning around and howling in the same key as Kahanna is singing. The best part of the video though, is the shaky quality of it, because Vanessa seems to be giggling too hard while filming to hold the camera straight. 

_BLH: These two need Grammys_

_VVM: RIGHT! IM SAYIN_

_VVM: I wanna join in but I’m afraid of ruining it_

_VVM: anyways how’s your evening going, blondie?_

_BLH: Trying to choose an outfit. Nina’s birthday and she wants to go clubbing, as if we’re not too old._

_VVM: speak for yourself, grandma, some of us are still young_

_VVM: that being said, you’re not too old for clubbing at all_

_VVM: show me some of those outfits_

_BLH: Like, take pictures of them?_

_VVM: yeah_

_VVM: better yet, facetime me_

It seems like as good of an option as any. Maybe Vanessa can help her decide. 

Vanessa picks up the call on the first ring, Riley’s singing reverberating loud and clear in the background. _“Hold up, lemme go to my room and close the door. These opera singers be too fucking loud.”_

Brooke watches as Vanessa falls back onto her bed, her hair fanning out all around her. _“There. Much more comfy. Now, show me some outfit options.”_

“Let me prop my phone up on my dresser, hold on.” Brooke leans it carefully so that she can get a clear, hands free shot of herself, and gives a little wave to the camera. 

Vanessa giggles on the other end of the line. _“Hi to you too, you dork.”_

“Okay, help me decide, I’m stuck. Mostly ‘cause I don’t wanna go.” Brooke pulls out a couple dresses and lays them on her bed. “I guess I’ll just hold them up one at a time, or something?”

 _“Nuh uh. You gotta try them on, give me the full fantasy.”_ Vanessa snuggles further into her pillows on screen, and it makes Brooke raise an eyebrow. 

“Really?”

“ _Mhmm_.”

“Fine.” Maybe it’ll be fun, help Brooke decide a little better. 

She pulls out a blazer dress, steps out of the frame to try it on. When she comes back, Vanessa is nodding appreciatively. 

“ _Okay, I could get into this. Suits you.”_

“Yeah?” Brooke faces the screen, turns a little so she can see her back. “I dunno if I wanna wear long sleeves tonight, though.” 

“ _Clubs do get warm._ ” Vanessa shrugs. _“What other options you got?”_

“How about this?” Brooke steps back in front of the screen after shimmying into her knee length, floral form fitting dress, one which she doesn’t pull out often because of how long it takes to take off when she has to pee. But it feels like a good option. 

“ _Woah_.” Brooke’s almost not sure if she hears the words or not, but Vanessa’s eyes are wide as she shuffles closer to the screen, and Brooke has to bite back a smirk. 

“Yeah?” Brooke puts her hands on her waist, turns slightly so that Vanessa can see what it looks like from the back. She knows what she’s doing. 

It works, from the way Vanessa gulps. 

Brooke knows that the two of them have chemistry. She hasn’t forgotten the holiday party, hasn’t forgotten the way it felt to have Vanessa gasping into her mouth. The way Vanessa had pulled her closer, the way Brooke hadn’t stopped wanting to kiss her, either. 

Well. They’re not actually together. But it’s nice to know she has chemistry with her fake girlfriend, at least. Sells the fantasy. 

Because that’s what this is about - being believable. 

That’s it. 

Right?

* * *

The club is a lot more boring to Brooke when she doesn’t feel like dancing with anyone. 

It’s too sweaty, that’s why. The club feels like it’s a million degrees, and adding dancing to the mix will only make it worse. Heck, Brooke’s sitting at the bar in front of a fan that is directly blowing cool air at her, and she’s still sweating like crazy. 

That’s why she doesn’t want to dance. 

All of Brooke’s friends are on the dance floor with their respective partners - save for Courtney, who’s found a girl for herself to make out with in the corner of the club. Brooke can’t help but feel...bored. Why dance anyway, when it’s too warm and sweaty and crowded? Why talk up a girl when-

When she has Vanessa? 

Technically, Brooke doesn’t have Vanessa. They’re not dating. She has to remember that. 

But they did sign a contract together, saying that they won’t mess around with others while doing this. Yes, that’s why Brooke is staying away from chatting up nearby girls. Because she has a commitment to keep. Not that she really wants to talk to other girls in the first place. But her gin and tonic is nearly done and she needs another if she’s going to be at this bar for any longer, so she signals to the bartender and opens up her phone while she waits. 

_BLH: Help, the club is boring_

_BLH: I’m wasting away at the bar_

_VVM: omg_

_VVM: go dance, you’re at a club_

_BLH: I don’t wanna_

_BLH: Stinky guys_

_VVM: stinky, huh?_

_BLH: You need to spray your perfume on them. You smell so much better_

_VVM: weird compliment, but I’ll take it_

_VVM: we should go out dancing. I’d give you such a better time_

_BLH: Would you, now?_

_VVM: you know it, blondie_

_VVM: let's do that for another date_

Brooke is reminded of the holiday party, of how they’d danced pressed up against one another and how it was fucking hot. The chance to do something like that again with Vanessa? She’ll take it. 

_BLH: You wouldn’t be able to keep your hands off of me_

_VVM: you say that as if you’d be able to keep yours off of me_

_VVM: I know how much you love grabbing my ass_

_VVM: not that I’m complaining about it_

Brooke smirks at her phone screen. She remembers how Vanessa had keened into her touch, spurred her on to keep going with little gasps into the crook of her neck. Dating or not dating, Brooke loves how easy Vanessa has been to take apart. She wants to do it again. 

_BLH: Interesting. Noted._

It’s funny. When she and Vanessa had signed their list, they had agreed on light PDA only. But there’s a part of Brooke that wants more more more, that wants Vanessa on her arm and wants everyone to know it. That Vanessa’s hers, that she’s the one who gets to take Vanessa home every night. 

Brooke almost wishes that those things were actually true.

* * *

“C’mon, Nina. There you go, come on out of the Uber. Small steps, don’t slip on the ice.” Brooke wraps one of her arms around Nina’s waist, holds her up as they head to Nina’s apartment. 

“Ugh. It’s too cold.” Nina leans her head on Brooke’s shoulder, and Brooke reaches out to pat her hair. 

“Almost inside. You got your keys?”

Nina fiddles in her pockets for a good thirty seconds before pulling them out, holding them towards Brooke. “Please?”

“I got you.” 

Brooke is usually the supportive friend in situations like these for Detox, helping her get home in one piece after she’s had too much to drink. Nina’s not usually the one to need it, but Brooke had found her in the club bathroom leaning against the mirror and sniffling about her fiancé. Considering the fact that they’d gone out for Nina’s birthday in the first place? Brooke had felt her duty calling. 

“I don’t feel so well. That car ride was fast.” Nina rubs at her eyes as Brooke tries to get her coat off, pushing it off her shoulders and hanging it on the coat rack. 

“Bathroom first, then.” 

Nina sighs, resting her head against the lid of the toilet after sitting down on the ground. The scene feels reminiscent of Brooke’s undergraduate days, when she’d partied too much and absolutely did some damage to her poor liver. She pulls Nina’s hair back, has to keep her nose from wrinkling when Nina lets out a retch. 

“Thanks, B.” Nina sighs when she lifts her head up, only to turn back towards the toilet to throw up again. 

Brooke’s definitely been there before. 

“No worries. It’ll feel better when it’s out of your system, anyway.” Brooke rubs her back, trying to keep her voice as quiet as possible because she knows Nina’s probably got a pounding headache, too. “Now, tell me. What made you drink so much today and end up crying by yourself on your birthday?” 

Brooke’s surprised by it, really. Nina’s usually the one who takes care of everyone else like its second nature, because she has a high tolerance herself. Which means that to reach this current point tonight, she’s probably had a _lot_ to drink. Which also means that something has to have really rattled her to get her here, bent over the toilet and looking slightly green. 

“It doesn’t matter.” Nina mumbles the words, looking down, and Brooke puts a hand on her shoulder, gives her a little squeeze. 

“Course it does. You can talk to me.”

Nina finally, finally looks at her, and Brooke can see the dimmed sparkle in her eyes, the sadness along her features. No, not sadness - more defeat. 

“Am I making a mistake, Brooke? Marrying Ben?” 

Booke pulls back in surprise. “What? What do you mean?”

Brooke has multiple friends that are in long term relationships and Nina’s, by far, always has looked the steadiest. The most wholesome. Nina never shuts up about her fiancé, telling Brooke all the time about the picnics he takes her on or the gifts he gets her or how they’re _absolutely_ soulmates. Nina’s always looked happy, truly happy with her man, something that Brooke has loved to see, because Nina’s the kind of person who believes in true love. In a happily ever after. And, up until this moment, Brooke has believed that Nina’s been living exactly how she’s always dreamed of. 

But what if she hasn’t?

“It’s just-it’s good. But it’s also _just_ good, y’know? He brings me flowers and always opens doors for me and snuggles me at night but…” Nina lifts her head, looks at Brooke, and her face is more lost than Brooke has ever seen it. “I don’t feel anything else with him. Like, it’s happy, it’s good, _he’s_ good, but-”

Nina cuts herself off, takes a deep breath as she lifts her left hand up, holds it out in front of them. The sparkling bling on her ring finger reflects sparkles along the bathroom tiles and walls, ones that make Nina wince when they shine on her face. 

“I just don’t know. I’m not feeling what I’m supposed to feel, y’know?” Nina sits back, scooches away from the toilet to lean against the wall. 

Brooke joins her because really, does she have anywhere else to be? She doesn’t know what to do though, not when Nina’s looking so forlorn and lost and all Brooke wants is be there for her, somehow, even though she’s never felt the way Nina is feeling right now. 

So Brooke leans her head on Nina’s shoulder, feeling the comforting warmth of Nina leaning her head against hers, too. “I dunno, babe. I wish I could tell you I had the answer, or how to make things magical, but I have none of those answers. All I know is that you deserve to be happy. You deserve the ending that you’ve always wanted. I think you need to first figure out exactly what that is.”

Nina sighs, twisting her ring on her finger. “I have no idea what that is.”

“No need to decide on your birthday with a tipsy brain. It can wait.” Brooke unfolds herself from the ground, gets herself up before holding her hands out to Nina so that she can help her up, too. 

“C’mon. Let’s get you into bed.”

The conversation replays in her mind, though, as she Ubers home from Nina’s. It makes no sense - how has Nina lost that spark with her fiancé, when they’ve always looked so stable? Did Nina ever really have it in the first place? Or did she just think she did? Was the way Nina had felt in the bathroom just cold feet, or was it something bigger?

And then there’s that spark Nina had talked about in the first place. Brooke tries to picture what it would feel like, what the concept of sparks flying actually even means. Fireworks and butterflies and falling head over heels? Hell, Brooke feels fireworks when she kisses Vanessa, but it’s only because she’s kissing a pretty girl after ages and ages and fully enjoying it. The concept of sparks flying feels elusive, something that could be searched for forever and ever without ever truly being found. It feels similar to the way that Vanessa’s looking for her true love and Princess Charming, and how she’s absolutely convinced that she’ll _know_ when she finds her. 

It feels like everyone has a radar for knowing these kinds of things except for Brooke. Not that Brooke minds, not really. Being in search of something that’ll never be in reach seems fruitless. Unnecessary. Especially when she has other things she’d rather be spending her time on. 

Quite frankly? Brooke’s good with just her cats and friendship - especially Vanessa’s.


	8. chapter eight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I had that afternoon meeting that ran way too long. It was boring as hell, B.” Vanessa lets out a dramatic sigh as she massages her quads to loosen them up. “I gotta squirm after. Let out all that extra energy that builds up like lava or some shit.”
> 
> “You are absolutely a volcano, I agree with that.” Brooke can’t help her snicker when Vanessa’s features are lit up in mock offense. 
> 
> “Bitch-”
> 
> “See? So adorably explosive.”
> 
> “Don’t make me burn you with my lava.” Vanessa sticks her tongue out and Brooke winks right back, just because she loves the way it always makes Vanessa’s breath catch in her throat.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all SO much for all the sweet reviews and tumblr messages - it truly makes me so so happy to read and reply to every single one. I love you all so much <3\. Here's your weekly chapter! Things...start to happen. Enjoy? Also Writ continues to be the best beta ever.

“Why we at another workout class? This your way of telling me I gotta exercise more?” Vanessa’s expression is skeptical, her eyes darting around the room as she watches the rest of the attendees warming up, already beginning to contort their bodies into various poses to stretch and warm up. 

“You’re the one who couldn’t sit still in my office before we left this afternoon.” Brooke lets out a snort as she folds over in her split, feeling the deep tug in her muscles that is always oh-so-satisfying. 

It takes her back to early morning ballet classes and leotards and repeating steps over and over again until they’ve become ingrained in her bones, a simpler time that had been cut short by injuries way too soon. A career in ballet hadn’t been in her cards, but the occasional dance class here and there works as an adequate substitute. 

“I had that afternoon meeting that ran way too long. It was boring as hell, B.” Vanessa lets out a dramatic sigh as she massages her quads to loosen them up. “I gotta squirm after. Let out all that extra energy that builds up like lava or some shit.”

“You are absolutely a volcano, I agree with that.” Brooke can’t help her snicker when Vanessa’s features are lit up in mock offense. 

_“Bitch-”_

“See? So adorably explosive.”

“Don’t make me burn you with my lava.” Vanessa sticks her tongue out and Brooke winks right back, just because she loves the way it always makes Vanessa’s breath catch in her throat.

But then the class teacher yells out a hello, and Brooke feels the excited tingling in her limbs, the way she’s already itching to stretch and move and dance. 

“I’m still nervous ‘bout this. What’d you say it was? Contemporary?” Vanessa’s eyes raise higher and higher on her forehead as the instructor demonstrates the combination that they’ll be working on, partnered with a fellow dancer.

“Yeah. Hey, you dance. You know how to take movements and make them your own. We’ll be great.” Brooke nudges Vanessa’s side, gives her an encouraging smile when Vanessa looks up at her with a slight panic in her eyes. “Besides, it looks like this choreography is learned as a pair. Which means we’re doing this together, partner.”

“Of course I got the partner who’s gone to fancy ballet school in the past and shit.” Vanessa lets out a little nervous chuckle. “My dancing is limited, y’know.”

“And yet, I have a feeling that you’ll somehow be better than most of the people here. No one’s as captivating as you are.” The words are so true, so natural coming from Brooke’s mouth that they don’t cause any disruption in the waves between the two of them.

Because Vanessa is, she’s someone Brooke can never take her eyes off of. 

“You’re just saying that because you gotta, as a fake girlfriend. That’s your job.” Vanessa winces when the class instructor lifts her own dance partner up in a gravity defying hold, as if she’s picturing how far the journey is to the ground.

“I don’t say anything I don’t mean. Now watch the combo. We’re going to be learning it in about thirty seconds.”

Dance, to Brooke, is as natural as breathing. Sure, the extension in her limbs and the spotting as she turns and the crispness in her movements aren’t as prominent as they used to be when Brooke was a teenager and in the studio every waking free hour she had, but the fluidity is. The way her muscles sing and strain and make her brain work double-time until the choreography becomes embedded in her bones and simply an extension of her. 

Vanessa’s looking at her when the last bit of the routine that they’re learning calls for them to face each other, close but not touching because the dance is portraying them as soulmates who are a smidge apart. So close and yet so far, separated by an invisible pane of glass. 

Brooke feels it, feels it in Vanessa too when the choreography seems to be pouring out of her soul, the emotion and movements that interlock so delicately between the both of them. It feels like Vanessa’s breathing out as she does, pulls in air in tandem with her and Brooke’s almost certain that their hearts are beating in sync, linked by the way their bodies seem to anticipate what the other is going to do.

It’s after their fifth runthrough of the entire routine towards the end of the class that the instructor calls for pairs to try and do it on their own, to let everyone else watch and learn. Maybe it’s the way hers and Vanessa’s hands are linked, the way that Brooke doesn’t want to let go of her or stop feeling her pulse beating against her palm, but the instructor stops in front of them. 

Gestures to the empty practice floor. 

“I saw how well you two were working together while I was teaching the piece. Go show us all what it’s supposed to look like, yeah?”

Brooke’s about to protest, say thanks, but no thanks, not today but Vanessa’s tugging on her hand, pulling her to the floor and it’s okay, it is, because she has Vanessa to focus on.

She can dance in front of everyone, pretend that no one else is here except for Vanessa.

Hell, Brooke used to dance in front of others all the time. Granted, the last time she’d done so had been as a teenager, but she can still do it now. Or at least try. Especially with Vanessa, whose feet are tapping and grip is tightening on Brooke’s hand because she’s a little nervous, too. 

* * *

_Instagram story posted by @bhytes. Brooke and Vanessa seemingly connected through the choreography, wrapped up in one another and almost anticipating each other’s movements, as if by magic. Song in the background: ‘What Now’ by Rihanna._

* * *

If Vanessa closes her eyes, she can still feel the ghost of Brooke’s touch around her waist. The way Brooke’s hands had held her, lifted her up, the way the strands of hair from Brooke’s ponytail had brushed against Vanessa’s face when she’d spun around. 

The way Brooke’s eyes had been endless, pulling her in and how tearing her eyes away had felt like physical pain. Vanessa’s peeking up at her as they walk, casting small glances because she’s absolutely going to get burned if she looks for too long. Brooke is the sun, and she’s drawing Vanessa in with light and promises and warmth, except Vanessa doesn’t know if they’re even meant for her.

She doesn’t know what to think.

Their dance and the holiday party and the way Brooke’s kisses make her feel more than any other past relationship ever has, even though they’re not actually dating and everything is fake and they’re just doing this for free food.

But there’s a part of Vanessa that’s enjoying it a little too much, that wants to keep this going on for longer and longer and longer because then she can keep holding Brooke’s hand. Feel her lips on hers.

She’s pathetic.

It had been the dance class. Somehow the determination, the rawness in Brooke’s eyes as they both moved all sweaty and out of breath had been the most beautiful sight to Vanessa, pushing her harder and harder. She’s never been so drained from a class before, and she’s never wished for a class not to end, either. Not if it means she never gets to see Brooke look at her like that again.

It’s as if the world has tilted on its axis. Sure, they’re just walking to the subway and away from the studio and it’s only been about an hour and a half since they’d walked in, but now everything feels clearer, sharper, yet somehow more shaky. More on edge. She can’t focus on anything else now, not the cracks in the sidewalk or the way the cars are honking in the busy intersection, because nothing is important anymore except for Brooke. Brooke’s holding her transit pass with a delicate air, her fingers tapping a beat on the plastic. Her hair is falling in soft tendrils from her bun, and Vanessa wonders how she’s never seen the way it shines gold in the light before. 

Part of her wants to get away from Brooke. Stop everything, all of it before her brain takes things too far the way it always does. Maybe she still has time to run home before she starts thinking about futures and other timelines with Brooke where they’re not dating just to win a bet. Instead, where they’re actually together and Brooke’s kisses actually mean something and her grip around her waist is more than that of a friend. 

But it’s too late. Vanessa’s gone, fully gone, because Brooke turns back, grins at her before they descend the steps to the subway station, and Vanessa’s heart flips over in her chest.

She’s screwed. 

* * *

Brooke wants to dance again. 

The contemporary class feels like it’s infused her veins with more energy than she’s had in months, and she’s alive with it, with the way it’s flowing through her soul. She wants to dance with Vanessa forever, take every class they can now together because she’s never felt this before - so connected, so in tune with someone else. 

Maybe this fake dating really has been a great idea, after all. 

Brooke had promised earlier in the day to make them both dinner, because the dance studio is closer to her apartment than Vanessa’s and at least they’ll be able to eat faster. She’d whipped up a risotto and Vanessa’s still raving about her cooking as she always does, still coming back for seconds but Brooke can’t shake the feeling that something is-

Off. 

Maybe it’s that when they turn on the new season of _The Bachelor,_ Vanessa is uncharacteristically quiet and not letting out the cracks and snickers she usually does when they watch trash TV. Maybe it’s the way that Brooke swears she catches Vanessa’s gaze on her and it’s not content or happy the way it usually is, but shifty. Nervous. Tense. As if something is wrong. 

As if Brooke has done something wrong. 

Brooke puts her arm around Vanessa because they’re so used to intertwining themselves on the couch now, having reached a level of comfort that reflects how close they’ve become. She does it every time they watch something all curled up in front of the TV. Except today feels different, off, because Vanessa tenses underneath her. 

It’s barely noticeable, and if it had been someone other than Vanessa, Brooke may not have noticed. But Brooke knows Vanessa as well as she knows the back of her own hand, the freckles on her own arms and it’s clear enough.

Vanessa’s stiff and maybe it’s because she’s uncomfortable but Brooke can’t tell, and Vanessa’s eyes are still on the TV as her breath hitches in her throat. 

“Hey, you okay?” Despite the soft voice, Brooke doesn’t mean to ask, not really. She doesn’t want to pry, but she doesn’t want to make Vanessa uncomfortable, be the one responsible for making her feel anything less than content. 

Vanessa finally, finally looks over at her, and the sight is disconcerting because it’s the first time that Vanessa’s emotions aren’t written on her sleeve. Well, they are - but Brooke can’t decipher the swirls in her eyes the way that she usually can, the way she ordinarily knows Vanessa better than she knows anyone else. But right now, Brooke can’t tell. And the thought of that alone is terrifying. 

“Yeah, I’m all good.” The half smile on Vanessa’s face isn’t convincing, not when paired with how stiff Vanessa is, how she bites her own lip before turning back towards the television. 

“Okay.” Brooke lets out the words in a breath so soft that she’s not even sure if Vanessa hears them, but what else should she do?

Brooke wants to fret, fuss over Vanessa and make sure she’s okay, but what if she’s already overcrowding her? What if Brooke’s in Vanessa’s space way too much and making her uncomfortable and wanting to get away from Brooke for once?

It’s simple between them. Or, at least it’s supposed to be, just a fun arrangement that makes them fake being together for some excitement in their lives. Except the carelessness and fun of it suddenly feels like it’s shifted into something else, something that makes Brooke’s heart flip over uneasily in her chest because she doesn’t know how to fix it. 

So they stay on the couch, and Vanessa eventually leans her head on Brooke’s shoulder, but Brooke can swear that she can feel Vanessa's heart speeding up, too. 

It isn’t until the final rose is handed out and crying girls are sent home after not winning the bachelor’s heart that Vanessa turns towards her, tucks a lock of hair behind her own ear. Her eyes flit to the photographs on the wall to the kitchen counter to the floor, never quite focusing on Brooke. 

“I gotta go. Riley’s probably getting antsy.”

It’s not a fake excuse, Brooke knows that, and she of all people understands the need to run back home to the pets. But it’s different, not something Vanessa’s ever said before because Kahanna’s always there, and Vanessa had attested in the past that Riley was always fine with her. 

So what’s changed? 

Brooke has a feeling it has nothing to do with Vanessa’s dog.

All to do with her. 

She doesn’t know why Vanessa’s pulling away, what about the dance class has made Vanessa so shifty when it had the opposite effect on Brooke. She wants to protest, stop Vanessa from leaving with a hand on her shoulder because _why,_ what’s changed? What has Brooke done?

The words are in her throat as Vanessa’s pulling her jacket and beanie on, lacing up her winter boots. Vanessa leaves with a wave instead of a nudge, or a hug goodbye and Brooke’s definitely not imagining it, no matter how paranoid she knows she’s being. 

Something’s wrong, and it’s her fault. 

* * *

Vanessa doesn’t stop by Brooke’s office the next morning. 

She can’t do it - she feels too fucking guilty. How can she pretend to fake date Brooke when all she wants is the real thing, to have Brooke pull her in and kiss her and rest her head on her shoulder? It’s wrong, it’s so wrong and she’s exploiting Brooke, she knows she is if she does it any more without Brooke even being aware of it. 

She needs to get her feelings under control. 

Vanessa’s brain has always been a bit of a dumbass when it comes to dating. Falling hard and fast, getting hurt in the process or ending up disillusioned. She had thought it would be safe from Brooke when they first started this, she really had, because ending up with Brooke hadn’t been the purpose of the fake dating in the first place. It had been for some fun and some free food and she had ended up becoming great friends with Brooke in the process, and has found a level of comfort with her that she doesn’t come close to sharing with anyone else. 

Except now that all feels blackened, marred, because Vanessa’s staining it with the way her heart tugs for Brooke, and wants her not just as a fake girlfriend, but for something real. Something that neither of them ever agreed upon. 

Brooke’s going to hate her. Never want her to come near her again, not after trusting Vanessa and now look at how she’s gone and caught feelings? 

Vanessa needs to get over this, and fast. Because Brooke doesn’t deserve to be written off as just another person who Vanessa ruins by coming too close to them with her heart. 

She texts Brooke around lunchtime, because while cutting contact is safer it just feels cruel, and she doesn’t want Brooke to be hurt because of her. So she cops out, gives a measly excuse that would be ridiculous if it wasn’t for the way she already feels sick to her stomach. 

_VVM: gonna skip lunch with u today_

_VVM: think i ate something bad yesterday my tum hurts_

_VVM: gonna head home :((_

The ticking of the clock is torturously slow, minutes passing at what feels like a snail’s pace before Vanessa’s phone lights up with a reply.

_BLH: okay_

_BLH: hope you feel better_

Vanessa bites her lip when the three dots signalling that Brooke is still typing disappear from the chat, and maybe she’s fucked up, really fucked up. Maybe Brooke can already tell what Vanessa wants and hates her for it. Maybe Brooke wants Vanessa to leave her alone first-

But then Brooke sends a gif of two cats cuddling, their eyes closed and looking serene.

_BLH: hugs for your tum_

The tug in Vanessa’s heart knots itself just a little bit tighter, weaving fragments of Brooke throughout itself because there’s no way she’s ever going to be able to let Brooke go without her heart shattering itself into pieces in the process. 

“Vanj. Vanj!”

A’keria’s voice nearly knocks Vanessa off of her chair, pushes through the thoughts of Brooke that don’t seem to be able to leave her mind and Vanessa has to catch her breath before turning to face her. 

“What?”

“I asked you three times already. You ain’t listening.” A’keria pouts, points to her screen where a Buzzfeed quiz is open. “Now, choose a man. Michael B. Jordan or Maluma?” 

“Maluma.” Vanessa sighs as A’keria clicks his picture, leading her to her next quiz question. “Kiki?”

“Yeah?” 

“How does your ass stay so unmessy when it comes to relationships?”

A’keria’s dating history remains relatively tame, just guys who are sweet enough to have earned Silky and Vanessa’s approval in the past. Hell, Vanessa’s positive that she’s still friends with some of them, having formed strong enough bonds to not lose them in the process. 

A’keria’s never had the ridiculousness of Vanessa’s past relationships, filled with tearful breakups and too much yelling and jealousy and explosions that scratched Vanessa’s delicate surfaces a little more every time. She doesn’t want to ruin what she has with Brooke, she _can’t,_ because Brooke is too important and deserves the best, but-

How can Vanessa keep Brooke without Brooke hating her for wanting something more, when they’d implicitly agreed to never go there?

“It’s called being a mature adult who knows how to talk. Not just talking for the sake of talking, Vanj. _Communicating._ ” A’keria’s clicked on another quiz, one about cast members from _Jersey Shore_ and Vanessa knows that she’s only half listening.

“What’s the difference?”

A’keria sighs, pushes her chair away from her cubicle so that she can face Vanessa more easily. The look in her eyes is soft, sympathetic, the kind that A’kieria always takes on when it’s time for her to turn into the mom friend. “You keep shit inside that should be out in the open and it’s gonna fester and build up and turn into resentment. Relationships ain’t always magical. They need that strong foundation to build upon and get stronger with time. And you do that by being honest and communicate things that need to be shared.” 

“How’s it so easy for you to tell your man shit that could be taken badly?”

“Taken badly? What, you killed someone and want her to hide the body, Vanj?” A’keria reaches out, squeezes her hand. “Listen. You two been together for quite a few months now, and it’s sappy as fuck how quick her eyes light up when she’s around you. You’re good together. Whatever it is, it’s something that can be worked through with each other. I have faith in that.”

“That makes one of us.” Vanessa mumbles the words under her breath, because she can’t really go and tell A’keria the truth, the fact that they’re not even together. 

What’s Vanessa supposed to do? She doesn’t want Brooke to hate her, see her as predatory now that she has feelings towards her. Think that she’s just doing it for her own selfish reasons. Which Vanessa _is,_ technically, but for food, not for free kisses. 

What if Brooke won’t be as comfortable with her anymore? What if Brooke will think that Vanessa is taking advantage of her? 

Vanessa can’t tell Brooke, she can’t. But she can’t get too close to Brooke anymore, either, for her own sake. And she absolutely can’t follow A’keria’s advice and tell Brooke about her feelings, not when she’s probably going to be disgusted by them. 

Vanessa’s never really one to make smart decisions. Not that she really has a choice in the matter when alI of the options are shit.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry, you guys! This is a happy story, though, remember that. It'll end just fine.


	9. chapter nine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Spill, Vanj. Is it ‘cause Ariel took the last cinnamon bun during the breakfast meeting today? You do like those.” A’keria scoots closer on her other side, pats her shoulder. 
> 
> “Why do y’all think it’s food related?” Vanessa scowls, but pauses, because it kind of is. Brooke is a bit of a snack. 
> 
> One that she’ll probably never have again. 
> 
> “‘Cause it usually always is.” A’keria snickers, reaching for one of Vanessa’s uneaten sushi rolls. “You threw a fit yesterday after the bistro didn’t have your favourite grilled veggie sandwich.”
> 
> “And last week, you called me upset in the grocery store because you were unable to decide between two brands of hummus.” Silky grabs a roll, too, letting out a noise of content after popping it into her mouth. 
> 
> Vanessa huffs. “Not related to food. And stop eating my damn dinner.”
> 
> A’keria doesn’t miss a beat. “Eat it, then.” 
> 
> “No.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all so, so much for the continued sweet comments and support on this fic. it's so encouraging as a writer and never fails at making me happy, so thank you. <3 This one is a doozy, so...enjoy?

Brooke’s trying really, really hard to focus on the spreadsheets on her computer screen, with the cells and numbers that had begun to blur together hours ago. Because it’s fine, everything is fine, nothing is weird or off or wrong.

It isn’t.

Maybe there’s a logical explanation. There has to be - Brooke always starts to spiral, anyway, when there’s no need for it and she’s learned how to appraise situations over the years that could be confusing. She knows how to talk herself down.

Except that Brooke’s unable to think of anything that can explain the past week at all. Because everything had been normal a little over a week ago, her and Vanessa had been hanging out the way they always do, and then all of a sudden, things had changed. After they had taken the contemporary class, that fucking class which had been amazing and _Vanessa_ had been amazing and they had been so amazing together, so in sync. 

Brooke wants it back, that feeling of being in tune with someone, with Vanessa. Because they’ve been in tandem for months now, playing off of each other and having such a good time pulling off their scheme. Brooke’s never laughed as much as she has in the last few months with Vanessa or ever had so much fun, and has never opened up so much for someone else, either. 

Someone who Brooke feels like is pulling away. 

Brooke tries to rack her brain as the clock on the wall keeps ticking and bringing her closer to lunchtime. It can’t be anything that Brooke has said over text, because she’s pretty tame when it comes to messaging and lets Vanessa take the lead most of the time. It can’t be anything from work, because they’re in different departments and rarely cross paths in a professional way. So it has to be the contemporary class. Maybe taking Vanessa to the class had been a mistake. Because they’d done a paired dance and they’re not an item, and maybe it just made everything too real, too weird when they had to connect like that, dancing and working off of each other. 

Paired dancing doesn’t bother Brooke, because she’d done them in ballet school with classmates. But maybe Vanessa’s not used to it, maybe it had felt odd for her, a little too close for comfort. 

But just a dance class can’t be enough for Vanessa to pull away the way that she has. Was it instead something Brooke had said, maybe too many wine glasses in before Vanessa had decided enough was enough?

What if Vanessa regrets ever asking Brooke to be her fake girlfriend? What if Brooke’s somehow screwed it up enough that Vanessa hates her and doesn’t even want to interact with her anymore?

But she can’t have, because Vanessa’s not like that. Vanessa’s open and understanding, a good listener too if she can keep quiet for long enough. Vanessa isn’t one to just go and practically ghost someone for no reason. 

Maybe Brooke should text her, strike up a conversation using a neutral topic to get things back to the way they should be. Maybe it’ll fix this vibe between them. 

_BLH: The interns are discussing the last 90 Day Fiance episode by the photocopy machine_

_BLH: Part of me wants to join in_

It’s not that Brooke expects a text back right away, not really, or even an hour later at that. She puts her phone away and tries to bury herself in work and emails and conference calls, until it’s the end of the day and she’s pulling her phone out of her drawer again and…

Still no message from Vanessa.

Which doesn’t matter. It’s fine. Brooke isn’t clingy for someone who’s her fake girlfriend, she’s not. She has no reason to be.

It’s just that Vanessa usually texts her back and makes her laugh, by coming up with something silly. Usually, Brooke’s giggling down at her phone screen and not at all looking like the project manager that she’s supposed to be, except not today. Because the only text messages she has are from her group chat with Courtney and Steve. tentatively planning a group vacation for later in the year.

Brooke’s overreacting. She shouldn’t be unsettled by the change in Vanessa, because Vanessa doesn’t owe her anything, not in the least. There’s nowhere that states that they have to talk all the time, anyway. So why does it feel like so much more?

Brooke heads to her spin class before going home, cooks dinner while the cats sit on the kitchen counter and watch her pace as the stir fry on the stove begins to sizzle. Her screen is still empty of notifications as she does the dishes, tidies up her kitchen and living room a little. The spot on the couch where Vanessa likes to sit taunts her, reminding her of the fact that Vanessa isn’t there. That she probably doesn’t want to be anymore.

But why?

* * *

Brooke’s tired. 

She’s had three meetings, a rather lengthy phone call with a potential supplier, and now is only halfway done with wading through the mess that is her work inbox in the days leading up to a big deadline. She hates this part - when the pieces of the puzzle still need to come together, when she’s doing everything she can on her end but has to leave certain parts unfinished until other people do theirs. It’s the time when a project feels like it’s not going to be able to come together on time, when she’s going to have to take the fallout because she’s the manager. It always does get done, in the end. Brooke knows that. She just hates the waiting. 

She needs a cigarette. 

The balcony on the 9th floor had been an accidental yet pleasant discovery when Brooke had first started at her job years ago, and had gotten lost trying to find a meeting room. It’s been empty in the years since, somewhere she’s been coming to clear her head more and more often whenever she needs to. She had added a hanging plant to the railing a few summers ago, and the vines continue to spread out more and more every time she visits. 

It’s nice. It’s her space. Brooke’s never seen anyone here before, and she’d always thought that the unassuming door leads to others passing by and not stopping, but-

“ _Vanessa?_ ” 

Brooke feels rooted to her spot at the door, as if the vines from the railing have twisted up her ankles to keep her in place. Vanessa whirls around like she’s been caught, nearly jumping a foot in the air and from the wideness of her eyes and the way her lips are slightly parted, she doesn’t look like she’s been expecting Brooke, either. 

“What are you doing here?” Vanessa’s tone is slightly on edge, slightly panicked. As if she’s the one who’s been ignored for the past few days. 

“I could ask you the same thing.” Brooke doesn’t mean for her voice to come out cold and dismissive, but it keeps her hands from shaking as she lights her cigarette. “This is my spot.”

“Your spot? No it ain’t.” Vanessa crosses her arms, raises a brow when Brooke looks over at her, and she has to try hard to keep her heart from beating out of her chest and letting out words that absolutely don’t need to be spilled. 

“Yeah it is? Who do you think added the plant?” Brooke’s traitor plant, not telling her that Vanessa’s been coming here too without her knowing. The absolute betrayal. 

“And here I thought the janitors just wanted to make the balcony all pretty.” Vanessa's lips curve up in a slight smile and Brooke has to push down the way she naturally wants to reciprocate, because Vanessa always manages to pull her face into that expression. 

But she’s still annoyed. 

Brooke lets the silence hang and become denser and heavier between them, until the air becomes hard to pull into her lungs. She doesn’t break it, though, instead waits until Vanessa cracks first because she doesn’t have any explaining to do of her own. It’s not on her. 

Vanessa breaks the way that Brooke expects her to, tucking a lock of hair behind her ear as she tears her gaze from the traffic below and brings it up to Brooke, her eyes pleading with something that Brooke doesn’t understand. “Listen Brooke, I…” 

Brooke has to let out a laugh of disbelief when Vanessa trails off, and takes another drag from her cigarette because what else is she supposed to do, anyway? Spoonfeed Vanessa some excuse? “That the best you got?”

“It’s not that simple.” Vanessa’s fiddling with her hands the way Brooke knows she does when she’s on edge, and Brooke has to resist the urge to reach out and squeeze them.

“Pretty sure even I have enough brain cells to understand what’s going on. Pretty shitty, y’know, ghosting a fake girlfriend. The heartbreak almost feels real.”

Maybe it does feel real. Maybe the tug in her lungs when she breathes in the nicotine feels exactly the way her chest does when Vanessa avoids her. Maybe the way she’s been racking her brain, trying to figure out what she’s done wrong, is the closest she’ll ever get to understanding how her taken friends feel. 

Not that Brooke’s keen on ever experiencing it again. 

“I didn’t - I didn’t mean to push you away.” Vanessa mutters the words, as if saying them softly keeps them from being true. 

“Then what?” Brooke doesn’t mean to sound so biting, so desperate, but it makes no sense - none of it makes any sense. 

Not the way Vanessa’s avoiding eye contact with her and biting at her lower lip, her teeth nearly breaking the skin and making her bleed. Or the way that Brooke’s heart is attempting to rip free from her chest, escaping the vault that her ribs form around it.

Vanessa’s tapping an irregular beat on the railing, the unpredictability paralleling with the way that she herself always seems to change at a moment’s notice. “I can’t tell you.” 

Brooke lets out a frustrated breath, running a hand through her own hair that’s going to be impossible to salvage from the wind later on. “Why the fuck not? Why, you found a new person to fake date? Or what, you actually found a girl to give you that happily ever after you’ve always wanted? Pretty easy to ditch someone once you’ve gotten your fairy tale, huh?”

Vanessa’s eyes darken, storms in her pupils as she narrows them. “It ain’t like that. You don’t know shit.”

“Impeccable comeback. Especially since you’re not telling me anything in the first place. Very impressive.” Brooke spits out the words, as if the poison that leaks through them will cover up the desperation that threatens to bleed out from under her skin ( _what’s wrong, what did I do, why won’t you talk to me?)._

But Vanessa’s definitely not going to tell her anything now, from the way her face is hardening, her expression turning into a scowl that is so unlike the bright smile that Brooke knows well. “You think I’m gonna now? Not gonna happen. You don’t deserve to know.”

“So you’re just not going to talk to me from now on, after all of this? After all of our fake dates and hangouts which apparently don’t mean that much, if you’re ready to let them go just like that?” 

Brooke tries not to think about how Vanessa fits perfectly in her arms when they’re leaning against each other and watching TV, or how Vanessa makes her laugh more than anyone else she knows. Because it’s irrelevant right now, and the tugging in her heart is doing nothing to help her keep her composure. 

“It’s a fucking mess, okay? I need to figure this shit out and I can’t do it with you confusing me right now.” Vanessa holds out a hand as if Brooke is a nuisance, as if she’s bothering her and Brooke can’t take it anymore. Not when she doesn’t even know what puzzle Vanessa is trying to solve in the first place. 

“Really, huh?” Brooke lets out a bitter laugh, almost distracting enough from the way that her chest seems to clench at the words _(no, no, no)._ “Then fuck it. This, right here? It’s done.”

The words feel like the final bricks of the wall that has built up between them over the last week. Brooke hasn’t been the one to add much to it, but sealing it up now feels final. Lasting.

The lump in her throat has nothing to do with Vanessa or being upset. Brooke wants to pull out another cigarette, bring the burning sensation back to her lungs to drown everything else out, drown Vanessa out because she can’t do it anymore. 

But Vanessa’s face is faltering, and the step she takes forward mirrors Brooke’s step back towards the door. “Brooke-”

“We’re done.”

* * *

Brooke doesn’t answer her texts or calls. 

Vanessa supposes that she deserves it, really, after leaving Brooke high and dry for more than a week and then pushing her away when she’d tried to ask why. 

But what else was she supposed to do? 

Vanessa wants to throw her phone across her room, have it collide with the wall and maybe, if she’s lucky enough, shatter into a million pieces so that she doesn’t have to see how it’s so dreadfully empty. How Brooke’s ignoring her in the way she rightfully deserves. It’s a reminder of the fact that Vanessa’s fucked up, royally fucked up, because she can’t even keep a fake relationship intact. Because she ruins everything.

It makes sense, when Vanessa thinks about it. She’s the common denominator in all of her past relationships, all the past girlfriends and occasional boyfriends that she’s never worked it out with, because they had never fit just right. 

But maybe, Vanessa’s the one that doesn’t fit. She can’t gel with anyone, can’t complete anyone because she’s an anomaly that is too loud, too overbearing, and who would even want it? More than that, who would actually want to stick with it? With her?

It makes sense that Brooke’s letting her go. And Vanessa is the one responsible for it. 

Vanessa really should have just kept her fucking mouth shut. She should have gone about life like normal, ignored the way her heart still goes into overdrive whenever she sees Brooke, the way Brooke cures any bad mood she has and makes her believe that maybe, just maybe, everything will be okay. 

But Vanessa couldn’t deal, she couldn’t be a normal person around Brooke after she had realized that she cared, and cared so fucking much at that for Brooke. And wanted more. And maybe even loved-

No. 

Vanessa doesn’t. 

And now Brooke hates her because she couldn’t fucking explain herself at the time and instead had pushed Brooke away, widening the distance between them to clear her head. Except that now Brooke’s too far, practically unreachable and continuing to walk further and further away from her. 

Like everyone else has. Like everyone else will continue to do so, because Vanessa knows just how to ruin whatever good actually comes into her life. 

She’s so fucking stupid. 

Part of her wants to head up to Brooke’s office, plead her case, apologize - something, anything to break this silence between them, to shatter the walk that’s built up, but what can she even say? _Oh sorry Brooke, I’m actually super into you, I swear I’m not a creep even though I want it to be real and don’t want to fake it anymore?_

Vanessa can’t do that. She just can’t. 

Silky and A’keria notice that something is off when Vanessa sinks onto A’keria’s couch with a sigh as they unpack their delivered sushi, not bothering to reach for her own. Or maybe they’ve been noticing it all week, because the glances that the two of them exchange are familiar to Vanessa, as if they’re deciding whether to say something or not. 

Vanessa feels a hand on her shoulder when she rests her cheek on her hand, closes her eyes because she’s really not too hungry. Silly’s face is uncharacteristically soft, empathetic. “Wanna talk about it?”

“Nah. Ain’t a big deal.” She can’t tell Silky or A’keria, of all people. Not when they’re the two that she’s been hiding the fake dating from in the first place. 

Damn. Vanessa really knows how to get herself into some complicated shit that no one else is able to get her out of. It’s a talent, really. 

“Gotta be a big deal, ‘cause you’ve been pouting all week and weren’t even excited for Taco Tuesday, and you’re _always_ excited about Taco Tuesday.” Silky’s brows knit in concern, and Vanessa wonders if Silky truly is bothered by it - because, after all, Silky had been the one who had gotten her uneaten tacos that day. 

“Spill, Vanj. Is it ‘cause Ariel took the last cinnamon bun during the breakfast meeting today? You do like those.” A’keria scoots closer on her other side, pats her shoulder. 

“Why do y’all think it’s food related?” Vanessa scowls, but pauses, because it kind of is. Brooke _is_ a bit of a snack. 

One that she’ll probably never have again. 

“‘Cause it usually always is.” A’keria snickers, reaching for one of Vanessa’s uneaten sushi rolls. “You threw a fit yesterday after the bistro didn’t have your favourite grilled veggie sandwich.”

“And last week, you called me upset in the grocery store because you were unable to decide between two brands of hummus.” Silky grabs a roll, too, letting out a noise of content after popping it into her mouth. 

Vanessa huffs. “Not related to food. And stop eating my damn dinner.”

A’keria doesn’t miss a beat. “Eat it, then.” 

“No.” 

“C’mon, Vanj. Tell us. We’re here to listen and fight anyone on your behalf, and you know it.” A’keria squeezes her shoulder. “Is it your girl?”

Vanessa must flinch, because A’keria’s face morphs into an expression of sympathy. “Oh, baby. What happened?”

“Nothing.” Vanessa mumbles the words as quietly as she can, squeezes her eyes shut tighter, as if maybe it’ll make everything around her disappear.

“Did y’all fight? Is she treating you bad? What’s Blondie doing? Do _I_ gotta square up with her?” Silky’s voice reaches a higher and higher pitch as she looks over with concern. “Y’all gonna be okay?”

“I messed up, not her.” Vanessa mumbles, quietly enough that maybe, just maybe, Silky and A’keria don’t hear it. “Caught feelings.”

“Caught feelings? You in a relationship, dumbass.” Silky snorts, finishing off her dinner and dropping her chopsticks on the coffee table with a flourish. 

Well. Vanessa may as well, since her and Brooke are done. There’s no point anymore. 

“Yeah. About that…”

* * *

“We bought you _food_ -” 

“It was just supposed to be fun-”

“Pad thai. So much pad thai-”

“For shits and giggles-”

“An _entire damn pizza_ -”

“Just a nice good time, y’know? Acting a fool and pretending to date while having a blast.” 

Vanessa would feel bad, she would, except the sight of A’keria rubbing her temples as if she has the world’s worst migraine is kind of funny, even though she’s still feeling like shit. Silky’s grabbed the boxes of cookies they’d bought for dessert and is munching her way through them, eyes wide, as her and A’keria try to decipher Vanessa’s words. 

“So, let me get this straight. You convinced her to pretend to be your girlfriend, just so that my pockets could hurt?” A’keria takes a sip of her drink, a long, long sip. 

“And it was working, it really was! But now it’s all gone to shit and she fucking hates me.” Vanessa sinks down further and further into the couch, as if it can swallow her up whole if she wishes for it hard enough. 

“The hell did you do, Vanj?” A’keria’s voice isn’t angry anymore, like Vanessa expects her to be. It’s soft, and it’s almost worse because now Vanessa can feel the pity rolling off of her, and she hates it. 

“Nothing! Well, convinced her to pretend to date me. Hung out a bunch, watched trash tv. Spent time with our pets. Went to workout classes together.” The wistful sigh that leaves Vanessa would be cliche were it not for the way her heart feels like it’s sinking down to her stomach, the more that she remembers how Brooke’s hair glows golden under the light of her bedroom window. 

“Y’all actually hung out outside of what you posted on Instagram? Damn.” Silky looks surprised as she grabs for another roll, and Vanessa shrugs. 

“Yeah, I mean, we’re friends. She’s fun to do things with and talk to. Well…” Vanessa pauses, because the most recent developments between the two of them reiterate themselves in her head, reminding her of the fact that they’re not like that anymore. “We _were_ friends.” 

But now she’s gone and messed it all up. 

“So what happened? You told her you want the puss for real and she bolted?” Silky shrugs when A’keria makes a face at her. “What?” 

“Jesus, Silk.” A’keria shakes her head, reaches out to pat Vanessa’s shoulder. “She didn’t take it well?”

“No, I…” Vanessa pauses, looks down because she hates reliving it, seeing it unfold in her head again. “I didn’t tell her.”

“Then why the hell are you such a mess?”

“Hey! I’m not a mess.” Vanessa’s _not._ She’s not. 

“You ain’t brushed your hair in at least two days.” A’keria rubs her fingers through her locks, wrinkling her nose when they snag in the tangles. 

“So? Maybe it’s a good look.” Not that even Vanessa’s that delusional. 

“But something’s happened, Vanj, so if you didn’t tell her, then what?”

“I tried to stay away from her until I could get my feelings under control so that we could still _do_ this, but then she started thinking that I was ghosting her and just wanted to ditch her, and now she hates me.” Vanessa thinks back to the way Brooke’s face had gone from hurt to indifferent on the balcony, how Brooke had buried those feelings right in front of her eyes, put the armour back up. She wants to tear it down, get her Brooke back, but how can she?

A’keria doesn’t respond, for a few seconds. She lets out a sigh, a deep sigh, before grabbing her drink and draining the rest of the glass. “I love you, Vanessa, I really do. But this?”

“Yeah?” Vanessa squeaks out the words, partially afraid because A’keria never uses her full name, not ever. 

“The pinnacle of stupidity.” 

“I _know.”_ Vanessa groans, because she hates it, really hates it. 

“How did she take it? Like when you were leaving her on read and shit?” Silky leans back against the couch cushions once she’s done her sushi, makes herself comfortable. “Did she care or…?”

“Course she cares. Wouldn’t you care if one of us left you on read, Silk?” A’keria gives Silky a pointed look, and she shrugs. 

“Yeah, but like, how _much_ did she care? Was she a normal amount of upset or super upset?”

“What’s a normal amount of upset?” Vanessa doesn’t want to remember how lost Brooke had looked on the balcony, how she had just wanted an answer and Vanessa wants to tell her, she really does. But how can she? “She looked pretty hurt.”

“Cause you done went and ditched her after spending 24/7 with her and left her without so much as a kiss goodbye.” A’keria’s words make Vanessa want to shrink, disappear, because they’re true. 

Vanessa knows that if Brooke had done the same to her, she would have freaked out, started to second guess all of their interactions and would have tried to figure out where she went wrong. 

Is Brooke feeling the same?

Vanessa thinks back to the balcony, when Brooke’s eyes had been so wide and pleading as she had asked Vanessa over and over again to tell her what was wrong. 

But then Vanessa had refused one too many times, until the vulnerability on Brooke’s face was replaced with a smoothness. A hardness. Similar to the way she’d carried herself when they’d first spoken in the cafeteria. The way Brooke presents herself to anyone that she hasn’t let in yet.

And now, it feels like there’s no going back. Vanessa’s only going to get the wall, the barrier that keeps her from the softer, sweeter parts of Brooke that Vanessa had felt like she’d earned - only to go and throw them all away.

She’s messed up. Really messed up. 

Vanessa slouches further down on the couch, wrinkling her nose towards the sushi on the table, because how is she supposed to eat anything now? “The fuck do I do?” 

“Like I told you before. _Talk_ to her. You run your mouth too much but never at the right times. Now’s the time to apologize, even if it’s gonna hurt your ego and shit.” 

A’keria tugs on Vanessa’s arm until her head is resting on her shoulder, and Vanessa’s reminded of how lucky she is to have A’keria and Silky as her best friends. Having people to lean on is nice, even when she can’t lean on herself. 

“She’s gonna hate me.” Vanessa mumbles the words as if whispering them will make them less true, as if Brooke hadn’t looked at her with disdain and rightfully so when she’d proclaimed that they were done. 

And who’s to know what Brooke is going to say now, if Vanessa tells her the truth?

Silky raises an eyebrow before grabbing the tempura. “Let’s be real. Are you gonna be worse off than you are now? It’s only gonna go uphill from here, ‘cause this really is ridiculously rock bottom, y’know.” 

“Hey!”

“You know I’m right. Talking to her ain’t gonna start World War Three.” Silky snickers at the look of indignation that spreads over Vanessa’s features before she can reel it in. “At least let her know that it ain’t anything she’s done. It was your stupid ass running after realizing you wanna bone for real.”

“You really gotta phrase it that nasty?” Vanessa makes a face, but she knows that Silky is right. That A’keria is right. That letting Brooke believe she’s done something wrong is unfair, that shutting Brooke out had been a huge damn mistake.

But the other option is almost scarier. How is Vanessa supposed to tell Brooke that she wants more, that she’s into her? That she doesn’t want to ruin their existing connection but there’s no way she can’t, because she likes her too damn much? 

Especially when Brooke herself had told her about her own dislike for relationships. About how they fall apart around her, how they always end in heartbreak and how Brooke wants to save herself from it by just...not dating. Carrying along on her own, because she can. 

Except Brooke still experienced heartbreak, thanks to her. Their fake relationship feels like it’s ended in a breakup - there’s no way Brooke’s going to trust her, or want to be near her now. Not anymore. 

Would she give Vanessa a chance to bring down the armour that she’s wrapped around herself? Vanessa’s not sure if she wants to find out the answer to that. 

* * *

Vanessa’s phone is taunting her. The blank screen, the way it hasn’t lit up with any new notifications from Brooke. 

Not that Vanessa expects it to. She doesn’t. Because Brooke won’t say anything to her. 

Right?

Silky and A’keria’s words ring in Vanessa’s head, lectures about _communication_ and _reaching out_ and _being mature for once_ that she wants to argue against, except that they’re both completely right. 

Vanessa’s going to have to be the one to reach out to Brooke, not the other way around. She tries not to think about the way that Brooke had already tried to reach out, already tried to text her once to make conversation before they’d seen each other on the balcony. Because even Brooke apparently knows how to communicate like an adult. 

The last unanswered messages from Brooke taunt Vanessa when she opens their conversation and she’s hit with a pang of guilt, like a blanket across her chest that squeezes her just a little bit too tight. It’s a visualization of the way that she’s been unwittingly punishing Brooke by stepping away and trying to figure herself out. Vanessa’s known that she’s done as much, yes, from their conversation on the balcony, when Brooke had looked at her with hurt eyes and unsaid accusations that she didn’t want to let free. 

Seeing it in front of her, though, on her phone screen, almost makes everything worse. Why _would_ Brooke want to reconcile, anyway, after being on the receiving end of it? Who’s to say she’ll even respond to Vanessa if she sends something now?

But maybe Vanessa deserves it, anyway. A taste of her own medicine. 

So she has to try.

* * *

_VVM: Hey...I was wondering if you wanted to talk? Same place, balcony, tomorrow at lunch?_

_Read at 7:53 p.m._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's light at the end of the tunnel! I promise!


	10. chapter ten

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Somehow, this is a version of pin the tail on the donkey that I don’t care to miss.” Brooke really doesn’t understand straight women. She doesn’t. Pinning a paper dick on a poster of Nina’s fiancé on the wall isn’t exactly high on her to-do list.
> 
> “Just wait ‘til her bachelorette party. The amount of dicks that are going to be involved? Oh boy.” Detox snickers, tapping her fingernails on the counter. 
> 
> Brooke wrinkles her nose. “Are those really necessary?”
> 
> “As official bachelorette party planner, yes. All the dick decorations.” Detox wiggles her eyebrows. “Or should I say, dickorations-”
> 
> “Gross.” Brooke groans when Detox lets out a snicker. “If it’s on a dude, I don’t want it. Especially if that dude is Nina’s fiancé.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Already time for the penultimate chapter. Thank you all SO, so much for all the kind words, the sweet reviews, the tumblr asks, everything. I know this ship isn't in its heyday anymore due to the new season but the fact that you still care enough to read and show some appreciation is the nicest thing, and is so encouraging as a writer. So thank you for all that YOU guys do for me, too <3 Writ beta'd this, of course, and continues to be the best, of course.

Of all the places that Brooke has ever wanted to get blackout drunk, a wedding shower is the last place she’s expected from herself. 

It’s not that she wants to be messy, because she really doesn’t. She just wants the entire thing to be wiped from her brain in the near future, because so far, it’s absolutely nauseating. 

Everything is just so _fake._ The _'congratulations’_ banners that hang from every wall, the napkins and cupcakes and party favours and plates that are inscribed with _N_ and _B_ because Nina and her fiancé are somehow still together, somehow looking nauseatingly happy on the outside, even though Brooke knows the truth about how Nina’s been questioning her decisions. All of the fake happiness isn’t real, none of it is real when the two of them are probably going to break up a few years after getting married, when they’re not in the honeymoon phase anymore. It’s stupid. 

So maybe Brooke’s jaded. A little bitter. But she’s allowed to be. 

“You’re missing a riveting game of ‘pin the dick on the dude’, especially ‘cause someone just pinned one on his face.” Detox slides into the seat next to Brooke, a mimosa glass in each hand. 

“Somehow, this is a version of pin the tail on the donkey that I don’t care to miss.” Brooke really doesn’t understand straight women. She doesn’t. Pinning a paper dick on a poster of Nina’s fiancé on the wall isn’t exactly high on her to-do list.

“Just wait ‘til her bachelorette party. The amount of dicks that are going to be involved? Oh boy.” Detox snickers, tapping her fingernails on the counter. 

Brooke wrinkles her nose. “Are those really necessary?”

“As official bachelorette party planner, yes. _All_ the dick decorations.” Detox wiggles her eyebrows. “Or should I say, _dickorations_ -”

“Gross.” Brooke groans when Detox lets out a snicker. “If it’s on a dude, I don’t want it. Especially if that dude is Nina’s fiancé.” 

“Is that why you’re sitting here all grumpy?” Detox hands Brooke one of the mimosas, and she doesn’t hesitate in taking a sip from it. “‘Cause of pin the tail on Ben’s crotch?”

“Is this not just so...convoluted to you?” Brooke trails her eyes around the room as she tries to come up with words to explain. But it’s hard, especially because everyone seems to be having fun. But what’s the point?

“What, party games?”

“No, everything else. Like, celebrating two people about to get married. As if half of marriages don’t end in divorce, anyway.” 

Detox’s eyebrows raise to her hairline. “Woah there, wedding Scrooge. This is one of your best friends who’s about to get married, you know that, right?”

“Right,” Brooke sighs, “sorry.”

Detox shrugs. “Hey, don't apologize to me. As long as you don’t spill to Nina about how you don’t like her schlong-related party games, I think you’re safe.” 

“At least she’s happy.” Brooke looks over, sees the way Nina is giggling in delight while taking a sip of her drink. 

_Is_ Nina happy, though, when a couple of weeks ago she had been a mess over the same guy? 

Brooke figures she has a chance to find out when the wedding shower ends and the guests head home, as she sticks around to help Nina tidy up the mess. It’s nice, as they clean up in tandem, Nina babbling about her dress and her wedding photographer, both of which make Brooke’s eyebrows rise when Nina tells her the costs. 

“The venue is so nice, B, it’s gonna be by the lake and next to a winery, which means _so_ many pretty pictures! We’re going on another tour of it in a few weeks and I can’t wait to start thinking about decorations and colour schemes and the flowers, all of the flowers. Will flower crowns for the bridesmaids be too much, you think?” Nina lets it all out in one breath, twirling the garbage bag in her hand as they clear up all the empty plates and cups. 

“I bet it’ll be fine.” Brooke tries to be delicate with her words, not outright ask what she really wants to because maybe it’s a little bit rude, but-

She can’t help it.

“Nina?” 

“Hmm?” Nina, sweet Nina, looks over at her with her eyes alight, a smile on her face, as if her drunk breakdown in the bathroom a few weeks had never even happened. 

“So you guys are good, then?” Brooke supposes that they must be, for Nina to be back to her regular level of excitement about the wedding planning. Because what else could even explain it?

Nina tilts her head, her eyebrows in a gentle furrow. “What do you mean?” 

Christ. Brooke doesn’t want to have to spell it out. “It’s just...a little different from how you were feeling the night of Detox’s birthday, that’s all. When you were slightly panicking over whether this was the right choice.”

Brooke’s curious, that’s it. Because how could Nina have jumped from the two extremes so fast? It makes no sense. How do you decide on someone just like that, after being on the fence for so long?

Nina shrugs. “It’s not me settling, if that’s what you’re wondering. Sometimes you just gotta go with what you have, y’know? He’s good enough, and I’m happy.”

Is she?

“Are you? A few weeks ago you were crying in the bathroom into a toilet bowl.” Brooke doesn’t mean for it to come out so bluntly, but it’s true, especially when Nina had looked more lost than Brooke had ever seen her before.

“I was also drunk, B.” Nina gives Brooke a look as if she should know better, and it makes her want to scream. 

“But they always say that drunk words are sober thoughts.” Brooke knows she’s pushing into territory that she shouldn’t, that she should be happy that her friend is happy, but-

“Why do you care so much?” Nina turns towards her, leaning an arm against the counter and Brooke has to stop herself from shrinking under her gaze. “I was in my feelings. Relationships fluctuate, it’s normal to second guess decisions, even if they’re the right ones. I know you’re blissfully happy dating Vanessa, but not everyone is in a permanent honeymoon stage like you two.”

Brooke’s heart trips at the mention of Vanessa’s name. She’s been doing so well, trying not to think about her and pushing all feelings about her away. She’s been dealing, she has. 

Because she has to.

“I’m-” Brooke pauses, because the tightening in her chest is pulling just a little too hard, making her forget any words that she can use to explain because…

Vanessa. Her smile, the way her eyes flutter when she sleeps, the way she loves snuggling with Henry, the way she yells at the TV.

But Brooke needs to scrub her brain of the memories, because Vanessa isn’t hers and won’t ever _be_ hers, even though the entire world fucking thinks so because they had been such good actors.

Brooke’s always been good at nuking herself.

“You’re what?” Nina raises an eyebrow as she waits for her to continue, her face a little softer, less defensive. Brooke wants to laugh, she really does, at how Nina’s spun the focus onto her now. She’s good.

“There’s a lot you don’t know about Vanessa and I.” So what if Brooke scrubs at the counter a little too hard, trying to get rid of an imaginary stain that’s not even there in the first place?

Nina lets out a little laugh. “What, that you’re perfect with each other? The cutest couple? Yeah, we know.” 

Brooke lets out a huff, because Nina doesn’t get it, no one gets it. “It’s not like that, we’re-”

“Doing great? Just fine, so you’re trying to make me question my own relationship instead?” 

“We’re not together, okay?” Brooke’s voice breaks because of _course_ it does, and she forgets how to breathe for a second because not keeping it inside anymore somehow feels wrong, against the rules. 

Those arbitrary rules, the ones that left Brooke more of a mess than she wants to admit.

They’re not together. They’re not. Brooke’s always known that. So why is it suddenly hard to draw air into her own lungs?

“You guys broke up? When?” Nina’s face softens as she drops the garbage bag in her hands, her expression shifting to one of sympathy and Brooke hates it, she does, because she doesn’t need it. “Brooke, I’m so sorry-”

“We never were! This, all of this... It wasn’t real. None of it was fucking real.”

None of it was real. 

Not the kisses, not the cuddles, not the constant texting, none of it.

Brooke’s known it since the beginning, she had signed up for it willingly with Vanessa. She had been ready to fool everyone, they both had been.

So why does the reminder hurt so damn much?

“What?” Nina’s eyebrows are raising higher and higher, and Brooke can see the cogs slowly turning in her brain. “What do you mean? How? What?”

“Haven’t seen you look this lost since we went to that French restaurant and the menu wasn’t in English.” Brooke tries to offer a little smile, because maybe if she stops now, doesn’t think about it, she can still get through this unscathed. 

Though Nina has other plans.

“Stop deflecting, just...what? What do you mean it wasn’t real? The two of you being practically glued to each other, the way you looked at her like some light was shining out of her head...that wasn’t real?”

“I didn’t do that.” Brooke mutters it under her breath, because she didn’t. No way.

“Shit, Brooke. From the way you both looked at each other, I thought you were starting to like, fully fall in love. I’ve never seen you so smitten. Ever, actually. That had to be real.” Nina doesn’t believe it, Brooke can tell, from the disbelieving scoff in her voice. 

Brooke almost wants to share the same denial.

“She asked me to be her fake girlfriend so that she could win a bet. Literally all it was.” Brooke doesn’t mean for her voice to sound so hollow, because it’s true. 

That’s all it had been. All they both signed up for. Nothing more than that. 

Is that why Vanessa had pulled away? 

Brooke’s heart had started to take over by convincing her that maybe, maybe, there had been more between them. But there can’t be, not when the twisting in her chest feels way more painful than any scrape, any muscle soreness from a workout class. It’s too much, the fact that one person has the capacity to make Brooke feel like this, even when she’s not physically present and breathing in front of her. 

Brooke’s not sure when Vanessa had first twirled her way into her soul, pushing aside any doubts and fears in her mind without either of them even realizing that she’d done so. It’s disconcerting, to look back now and realize how much of an exception Vanessa had been to Brooke’s ironfast rules. She’d been someone that Brooke could talk to, tell anything to. Someone that Brooke had felt comfortable pulling in close to her, someone that Brooke had invited over - not for sex, but to meet her pets. Make dinner with her. Someone that Brooke had gotten closer to without even realizing, someone that Brooke still cares for so _damn much-_

But she can’t. It’s not worth it, not when Brooke feels like she can’t breathe anymore because she misses Vanessa so much. 

“No wonder you agreed in the first place.” Nina’s voice is soft as she reaches out, squeezes Brooke’s shoulder. “You never used to date.”

“Still don’t.” It’s a bitter laugh, the one that leaves Brooke’s mouth. Because she doesn’t. And won’t. 

No fake dating, either. Not when it ends like this.

“But are you telling me none of that was real? Wait, let me finish-” Nina holds up a hand when Brooke begins to protest, shushes her, and Brooke has to stop herself from letting out a huff. “You’d light up like a Christmas tree, telling me about your dates and little things about her because you liked talking about her so much. And at the holiday party you guys fit so well together, you looked at her even when she didn’t notice with this tiny little smile on your face and before you call me weird for remembering that, it’s ‘cause you’re my best friend and I’ve never seen you look smitten before. Like, ever.”

“I’m just a really good actor.” It’s fruitless, not when Brooke doesn’t believe it herself, not really. “But now that you say it, it’s weird you remembered that, Nina. Sure that’s not a bunch of bull?”

Nina gives her a look. “Please. I lie to you about how you look good in magenta, not about shit like this.”

“Wait, what is that about magenta-”

Nina waves a hand. “Point is? You had something, Brooke. Maybe you still have it, I don’t know. You gotta tell me more. But is it worth not going after just because it didn’t start out that way?”

“Maybe it isn’t. Maybe I don’t want it.” Brooke doesn’t. Not if it makes her feel this shit.

“I’m calling bullshit on that. Not when you look so happy with her.” Nina’s looking at her like it’s so easy, like being with Vanessa is something that can happen without any complications whatsoever. She doesn’t get it. 

Brooke sighs. “It’s not that easy.”

If only it could be. If only she had the option of just reuniting with Vanessa and smoothing everything over, having their previous expectations give into something else, something realer. But she doesn’t even know if Vanessa feels it either, if she’s on the same page.

Hell, Brooke doesn’t even know what page she’s on herself anymore. 

* * *

Vanessa shouldn’t do something as stupid as going and calling Brooke. 

She shouldn’t.

Who’s to say Brooke’s going to pick up, anyway? Not when Brooke had made it clear that they’re done, that _whatever_ existed between them was done. That she never wants to see Vanessa again. 

Quite frankly? Vanessa deserves it. 

Except that Vanessa misses Brooke so fucking much. 

She thinks back to her last breakup with Aquaria. It had been pretty amicable on both sides, the two of them letting each other go because they just knew that they weren’t a fit. That they’d be happier off separate from one another, and that constant irritations and bickering weren’t exactly an ideal setting to build a relationship upon.

Vanessa had healed from it. Sure, she’d allowed herself a little bit of shade, a little jealousy, but as far as breakups go, it hadn’t been devastating to the immediate world around her. She had been fine.

Brooke hadn’t even been Vanessa’s actual girlfriend, but this? This feels worse.

She can’t stop picturing Brooke on her couch, Brooke reaching for her hand without even realizing it. They way they have _(had)_ so much in common, talking about all their fears and hopes and dreams because it had felt safe. Right. 

And now that the friendship is gone-

 _Had_ it been a friendship? On paper, yes. They had been partners in crime who became fast friends. But then it had been more under the guise of _faking it_ and sure, they had been faking it in front of their friends and on social media, but then there had been so much that they hadn’t shown to others. That had just been for them.

That has to count for something, right?

Vanessa opens their text chain for the twentieth time that day, biting her lip because the unanswered message really hurts, even though she had done the same thing to Brooke a few days before that. But she has to try, she has to try and reach out to Brooke again because if she doesn’t, then she’s not going to be able to live with herself-

_Incoming call from Brooke Lynn Hytes, 8:12 p.m._

* * *

Brooke needs to hang up, she can’t do this, she shouldn’t do this, she-

_“Hello?”_

Breathe, she needs to breathe, maybe this was a bad idea, maybe she should hang up-

_“Brooke? Are you there?”_

God, she needs to say something before Vanessa thinks she’s a creep or something. She’s already written notes on what to say, for god’s sake, she just needs to get it out. Except that the words are trapped in her throat, wrapped up in layers of self doubt and second guessing and maybe this is a bad idea, going with her instincts and just _calling_ without psyching herself out of it.

She can’t. 

_“I can hear your loudass breathing. Imma talk, then.”_

Brooke’s not a loud breather. But maybe it’s better if Vanessa takes over, because she can’t talk, not right now.

_“I’m sorry I iced you out. I didn’t know what else to do because I liked it so damn much. Spending time with you and doing things and just being with you and telling you everything and I started fucking catching feelings for you and I know that’s bad, I’m sorry, ‘cause I know you’re not interested and not into that shit and it’s fine, I can tamper it down I promise even though the bet is kinda done, I just don’t wanna lose you because this last little while has been shit without you ‘cause you’re the first one I wanna tell everything and the only one I wanna turn to and it’s fucking hard-”_

“I love you.”

_“What?”_

Brooke doesn’t mean for it to come out, and shit shit shit, it’s too much and she needs to never open her mouth again because she’s gonna keep fucking up everything around her-

_“Brooke?”_

Brooke doesn’t know what dying feels like but maybe it’s akin to this, because her heart has never beat so fast and the living room around her is a little hazy, a little out of focus. The clock on her wall ticks loud enough to make her flinch, adding a slow drumroll to the way the blood is rushing in her veins. 

There’s no taking it back now. 

Maybe Vanessa will hate her. Maybe Vanessa won’t want to see her again. But she can’t keep living like this, not anymore. 

“I fucking love you, and I’m sorry.” Brooke’s sorry because it’s going to keep messing everything up, Vanessa just has a few feelings and now Brooke’s gone and said this, but she’s not taking it back, not now. She can’t. 

_“The hell are you sorry for? Saying that? ‘Cause I love you too, so fucking much that it hurts and I miss you so much, B.”_

The way that Vanessa’s voice breaks on the phone makes Brooke’s heart drop, because she doesn’t want her to be hurt anymore, to feel upset and Brooke can’t do this over the phone, she needs to be where Vanessa is in person because it’s too far, they’re too far. 

“I’m coming over.” 

* * *

Brooke is five subway stops too far from Vanessa. 

The pattern that her fingers tap out on her thigh is reminiscent of her workout playlist, too fast and frantic but she’s going to implode if she doesn’t have the chance to move at all. The subway ads are only interesting to read for so long, and the bored commuters on the train are a stark contrast from her, some with their eyes closed, some with their noises buried in books. 

Brooke wishes she could know the secret as to how they’re all capable of shutting off their minds just like that. 

Maybe it’s easier for everyone else on this train because none of them are going towards Vanessa, because no one else has so many unspoken things to let out for once and for all. Because no one else on this train knows what Brooke is feeling, the jolt that’s now been sent to her heart after realizing she’s been changed by another person and never wants to go back. 

Brooke wants Vanessa’s hand in hers, drawing soft circles while the warmness of her palm acts like an anchor, pulling the frantic beating of her heart back enough for her to breathe. 

The _ding_ and announcement of Vanessa’s stop is a relief, feeling like a weight lifted because now Brooke can _move_ again, up the station stairs and even though her muscles are straining and she’s out of breath it’s better, because at least she’s doing something, making some progress. It feels strange, walking - no, running - through these familiar streets knowing what’s coming, knowing how different everything is going to be. 

And Brooke wants it, welcomes it, for once in her life. 

Of course Vanessa lives on the top floor, of course Brooke has to watch the floors climb ever so slowly, people coming in and out of the elevator as if they don’t have any cares in the world, as if they don’t _get it,_ but it’s okay, it’s all okay when Brooke reaches the 20th floor and it’s Vanessa’s and she’s only one hallway away from her. 

One hallway that shrinks into a handful of steps, a catch of a breath, a quick fiddle with her hair before Brooke knocks. Because Vanessa’s on the other side with wide eyes that sparkle, tugging Brooke inside by her wrist and going on her tiptoes to press a kiss to her lips that Brooke immediately deepens, and it’s worth it. 

Because the kiss is real.


	11. chapter eleven

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> She’s never had this before, and it’s scary, feeling so much for someone. But at the same time, Brooke’s never felt so vibrant, so alive. There’s a vine in her chest that blooms more and more in Vanessa’s presence, growing when Vanessa smiles at her or squeezes her hand or gives her a look when she tells a joke. It’s as if Brooke’s broken through the glass that’s kept her from feeling this much for someone, except no - it had been broken months ago by Vanessa, but Brooke’s just now beginning to look past the broken pieces, appreciating the way they reflect in the light. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another story reaching its ending. Thank you all so, so much for the sweet support on this one. When this fic had started, I had no idea where it was going, but it's taken such a journey and wrapped itself up nicely. It wouldn't exist without all the support and sweet reviews and comments all of you have left on it, because it makes me so happy and motivates me to write even more. So, thank you so much.
> 
> Extra thank you to writ, my fave writing buddy and cheerleader and let me tell you, my stories would not be a fragment of what they are without them. They're the bestest ever.

It’s five a.m. and Vanessa is sleeping in Brooke’s arms. 

Brooke’s not sure how they ended up in bed, not really, not when the clock on Vanessa’s wall had creeped past two, three a.m. and they had still been on the couch, talking and talking, undoing the story they’d created, the situation they’d caught themselves in. Vanessa had told Brooke her side, about how things had clicked for her and how she didn’t want to be the one to ruin anything between them, and Brooke had told hers in return. How Vanessa’s taken her hard, steadfast rules and stomped on them, made them irrelevant because who needs to stay away from girls, from relationships when Vanessa’s there? When being with Vanessa makes Brooke happier than she ever thought she could be?

She’s never had this before, and it’s scary, feeling so much for someone. But at the same time, Brooke’s never felt so vibrant, so alive. There’s a vine in her chest that blooms more and more in Vanessa’s presence, growing when Vanessa smiles at her or squeezes her hand or gives her a look when she tells a joke. It’s as if Brooke’s broken through the glass that’s kept her from feeling this much for someone, except no - it had been broken months ago by Vanessa, but Brooke’s just now beginning to look past the broken pieces, appreciating the way they reflect in the light. 

Nothing’s different, not really. They’re wrapped up in each other, and Brooke’s watching the soft rise and fall of Vanessa’s chest. They’ve been in this position before. Physically, on paper, everything is the same. 

But Brooke also feels a difference. There’s no more bet, no more faking. No doing this for Instagram comments or likes or any free food. She’s here because she wants to be, and Vanessa’s here and asleep and clutching Brooke’s shirt while she dreams because she wants to be here, too. 

It doesn’t feel forced, or fake, not that it ever did. Now, it just feels right.

Vanessa begins to stir around seven, letting out a soft little sigh against Brooke’s neck. Brooke finds herself lost in the way Vanessa’s eyes blink awake, all sleepy and fluttering but looking...happy. 

Vanessa leans into Brooke’s touch as she runs her fingers through her locks, lets out a little hum with a smile growing on her face. The rays from the window make her look like sunlight itself, because she’s glowing and Brooke feels her own face pull into a smile, the way Vanessa always makes it do so.

“Hi.” 

“Hi.”

“You’re actually here.” Vanessa says it as if the idea itself is a marvel, that she still can’t quite believe it - and maybe she can’t, from the way that she’s reaching out for Brooke’s waist, pulling herself closer.

“I am.” Brooke’s here. She’s actually here, and not because they’re faking anything, not because they’re trying to fool their friends.

But because whatever exists between them is real.

There’s a tug in Brooke’s chest, grabbing her attention for just a second, but enough that the thought holds onto her - what _is_ it now, that they have?

It’s not their acting. It’s not just being friends, because Brooke doesn’t kiss a friend like that, nor does she care for a friend in the same way that she’s beginning to care for Vanessa. 

It’s-

Different.

Brooke knows what she wants. What her heart is hoping, wishing for, what she can picture with Vanessa. And Vanessa wants it too, because Vanessa had also said _I love you_ and it has to mean something, right, rather than something just said in the heat of the moment-

“Why does it look like your brain is speeding down a dirt road at a million miles an hour?”

Brooke has so many things that she wants to say, things that they both need to talk about except that it feels like all of her words are gone now, with Vanessa curled up against her side. But she tries, opens her mouth because they do need to communicate, to not keep things back anymore.

“Are we…?” 

Brooke trails off, because what is she supposed to end her question with, really? She _doesn’t_ know what they are. 

Vanessa raises a single eyebrow and there’s a smile playing on her face, one that does wonders to calm the beating in Brooke’s chest. Vanessa traces her fingers along Brooke’s collarbone, Brooke’s shoulder, before pressing a light kiss to her skin and Brooke can’t help the way that it makes her blush. 

“Are we what? Didn’t finish your question.” Vanessa’s looking like she’s enjoying Brooke’s internal struggle - Brooke’s glad at least one of them is. 

So Brooke replaces it with another question. “What are we going to do?” 

“What do you want to do?” The lightness in Vanessa’s voice has been replaced with an edge, a nervousness, and paired with the way Vanessa’s eyes are flitting across Brooke’s face it’s almost as if Vanessa is nervous for what she’s going to say.

As if Vanessa has anything to fear, on Brooke’s end.

So Brooke reaches out, tucks a lock of hair behind Vanessa’s ear. “I know what I want. And that happens to be you.”

Brooke knows it now. She’s known it for awhile, pushed it down because they had been co-conspirators and _just friends_ and because Brooke isn’t a relationship person.

Or at least, hadn’t been a relationship person.

“But all that stuff you said…” Vanessa trails off, tilts her head slightly, “about not wanting to date because it all ends bad and you’re happy being by yourself - what about that?”

“Apparently, avoiding relationships because of potential pain doesn’t work.” Brooke snorts, wraps an arm around Vanessa’s waist. “Got myself hung up over you and had my heart broken enough.”

“Sorry.” Vanessa blushes, buries her face in her hands and Brooke’s quick to pull them back, press a kiss to her palm.

“Not your fault. Not mine, either. It just feels like even if you think you’re not meant for something, the universe will somehow find a way to make it happen. And it made me realize that this is something that I want. That I don’t want to run from it.” 

And how can Brooke, when Vanessa is here and with her and it feels so natural, so right? When so much has changed between them but Vanessa is still Vanessa, still smiling the way she always does and resting her head on Brooke as if it’s the easiest thing to do?

“That’s poetic as fuck.” Vanessa mumbles the words and Brooke holds back a snort, because of all responses to expect, Vanessa’s is so quintessentially her. 

“I know I’m not that Notebook movie fantasy, that romantic kiss in the rain, though.” Brooke’s not. She knows it, even though it makes her heart sink, that she’s not exactly what Vanessa’s always wanted. Maybe not the right person for her. But she doesn’t want to dwell on it too hard, because maybe-

“You more than my Ryan Gosling. In fact, you’re a brand new movie genre, ‘cause you don’t fit into a sappy romance movie. You even better.” Vanessa pokes her shoulder, and maybe, just maybe, it makes the weight lift from Brooke’s shoulders a little. 

“So I’m not a leading lady that’s going to sweep you off of your feet, huh?” Brooke teases, as she twirls a lock of Vanessa’s hair around her finger. 

“I ain’t saying that.” Vanessa smiles, tilts her head slightly before leaning in to press a kiss to Brooke’s lips. “I’m saying you already did.”

It’s hard for Brooke not to deepen the kiss, to not open herself up to Vanessa because she wants it, god she does, but-

-they still have things to iron out between them. 

So Brooke pulls back, ignores every instinct in her that wants to flip Vanessa over on the mattress. Vanessa’s looking at her with slightly dazed eyes already, albeit a bit confused. 

“What?”

“What happens if we’re not on the same page again? If something happens and we misunderstand and end up fighting?” Brooke bites her lip, because she doesn’t like the thought. 

Brooke doesn’t _do_ this. Relationships. Compromise. Considering someone else. Before, she hadn’t wanted to. But now she wants to forge a new path with Vanessa, wants to discover things with her but she doesn’t know how. 

It’s stupid. She’s thirty-three years old and still doesn’t know how to function in a relationship. What if she’s the one to mess everything up between them, because she doesn’t do the right things?

But then Vanessa’s pressing a light kiss to her lips and it cuts through the worries that run rampant through her brain, quiets them down because it’s easier to focus on the softness of Vanessa’s hair when it brushes against her cheek. 

“A wise lady once told me that communication is key. We’re gonna talk so dang much that you’ll get tired of me-”

“I won’t get tired of you-”

“And we’re gonna talk through things as they come up. Like adults. Because we’re adults.”

Brooke raises an eyebrow. “You sound like you’re trying to convince yourself of that one.”

“Shush.” Vanessa swats at her arm, but smiles nonetheless. “Seriously, though. I ain’t good at relationships either, so it’s new to me, too. But we’re gonna get through things together by being honest and not holding back. I dunno how good I’ll be, or how good you’ll be, either. But I’m willing to try if you are.”

Vanessa’s eyes are tentative, and the hand Brooke reaches out to smooth the crease above her brows feels natural. 

Brooke smiles. “I’m ready to try, too. Maybe we both have something to learn.”

Vanessa nods, making a face. “Oh, B. I’d tell you all about my past relationships, but I think that would send you running for the hills. Because hurricane Vanjie inevitably comes to town.”

“Oh, really?” Brooke snorts. It’s somehow not hard to picture Vanessa easily getting into fights. 

“Promise to try and talk to you instead of immediately scrapping or running.” Vanessa’s smile is sheepish, and it makes Brooke interlace her fingers with hers.

“And I’ll try my best to talk about things and not pull away.” The words are easy to say, because Brooke believes them. 

There’s no guarantee for anything, ever. But it doesn’t mean that she can’t try, that the both of them can’t try together. Because it’s going to be worth it, something that Brooke is finally, finally beginning to believe.

* * *

_Instagram story posted by @vanessavanjie. Description: Brooke sitting at her kitchen table, her legs crossed as she sips from her coffee mug, Apollo sitting beside her. Caption: ‘my fave morning view.’_

_Reply from @silkyganache: NOOO WAYYYYY_

_Reply from @mizakeriachanel: did you talk to her? FINALLY! Also you owe me like 10 lunches now, get ready to pay up on monday ho!!_

* * *

_Instagram story posted by @bhytes. Description: Vanessa holding Henry in her arms and snuggling him, a wide smile on her face. Caption: several heart emoji faces._

_Reply from @theonlydetox: WAIT NINA TOLD ME YOU BROKE UP_

_Reply from @theonlydetox: OR WEREN’T ACTUALLY TOGETHER_

_Reply from @theonlydetox: WHAT’S GOING ON_

_Reply from @theonlydetox: answer my FaceTime call I need the juice!!!!_

* * *

“Got your coffee.” Brooke sets the cup down in front of Vanessa and sits down across from her in the plastic cafeteria chair, taking a sip of her own. 

“You remembered my order.” Vanessa can’t help but grin as she takes a sip from the cup, because it just feels so domestic. 

“I did, but so did the baristas. I started mentioning two creams, three sugars and an extra vanilla shot, and they began to write your name on the cup before even asking me who it was for.” Brooke raises an eyebrow. “How do you absolutely not lose your shit with the sugar high after drinking one of these?”

“It’s called having an immunity to sugar. I’m already batshit, so it just fuels me.” Vanessa sniffs, a faux air of superiority in her voice and it has the intended effect of making Brooke crack up.

“You’re so silly.”

“And you like it.”

“That I do.” Brooke’s eyes are warm, and it makes Vanessa’s heart feel like it’s flipping in her chest before-

“Hey! Fry stealer!”

Vanessa pouts when Brooke shoves a fry from Vanessa’s lunch into her mouth, reaching out to grab another for good measure before she winks. 

“Sharing is caring.” Brooke pushes her own salad bowl to the middle of their table, gestures for Vanessa to have a bite. 

Vanessa wrinkles her nose, because the salad looks a bit sad. “If you think I’m eating that, you are sorely mistaken. There’s no cheese or caramelized almonds, there’s only lettuce. Where’s the dressing? Where’s the flavour?”

Brooke snorts. “First of all, that's kale, not lettuce. Second, the dressing’s over here, on the side.” Brooke lifts up a tiny container, holds it out for Vanessa to pour over the salad. 

“Much better.” Vanessa grabs it, wastes no time in sprucing the sad looking leaves up a little bit. Not that it works much. “Though I can see why you still want to steal my fries over eating this.”

Brooke doesn’t have time to defend her food choices because the squeak of a chair makes the two of them jump in their seats, turning to see Detox pulling up a seat, resting her elbows on their table with her eyes gleaming. 

“ _You,”_ Detox starts, pointing at Brooke with an accusatory look, “have _not_ answered my messages. Were the two of you really that busy railing each other?”

Vanessa has to cover her mouth to avoid letting loose a snicker, but Brooke doesn’t even miss a beat, looking as if she’s used to Detox’s words. “We’re at work. Do you think I’d be having sex with Vanessa at work?”

Detox clicks her tongue. “I mean, you two did almost do the deed on the Christmas party dance floor.”

“You really love to bring that up, huh?” Brooke makes a face towards Detox, but winks at Vanessa and she can’t help herself from grinning back. 

“Doesn’t matter. Tell me.” Detox leans forward on her elbows, looking between the two of them. 

“Tell you what?” Vanessa can’t resist joining, either, because Detox is so fun to wind up. 

Detox groans, dropping her face onto the table. “Are you two a couple? Are you two not a couple? Has this just been a giant social experiment to torment my brain? I need answers, you assholes.”

Brooke pats Detox’s shoulder, looking over at Vanessa with a raised eyebrow, a wordless question on her features. 

Should they tell their friends?

Vanessa figures that they all deserve to know, at this point, after having to weather through the drama from both her and Brooke. So she gives a small nod and a smile to Brooke, who taps on Detox’s shoulder, gets her to raise her face from the table and sit up straight. 

“It started as a fake arrangement so that Vanessa could win a bet against her friends. And then we became friends-”

“- _way_ close friends-”

“-and both liked each other, had some miscommunications-”

“-a little bit pigheaded-”

“-but we figured it out.” Brooke’s smile is soft as she finishes their joint explanation. 

The fact that they’re playing off of each other so easily now, able to predict what the other is going to say feels so markedly different from how they’d been just a few days ago. When Vanessa had no idea how Brooke had felt, when she had wanted to get through to her but was just so _scared._

And now? She has nothing to hide or hold back in the least, and the feeling is freeing, as if the last vines tethering the two of them to uncertainty have finally been cut. 

Detox looks between the two of them, a faux pout on her face. “Jesus Christ. How disgustingly cute. But,” she pauses, her eyes taking on a gleam, “so did y’all...y’know...do the deed? Consummate this relationship and all that? Or were you already doing the dirty? Are you being the thots I know you two have the potential to be?”

“My god, Detox.” Brooke rolls her eyes and Vanessa can’t hold back a giggle behind her hand. “You’re so lewd.”

“Answer the question.” 

Brooke looks over, makes eye contact with Vanessa and the slight raise of her eyebrow makes the memories of the previous night burn bright in her brain. The way Brooke had eaten her out against the wall. The way Brooke had come with her name on her lips as her back arched against the mattress, loud and not holding back and definitely heard by the neighbours because neither of them could be quiet at that point. The way the sheets on Vanessa’s bed had ended up on the ground, still there in the morning when the two of them had woken up tangled in each other’s arms. The way Vanessa's still a little bit sore, but pleasantly so, and how she’d had to use some concealer along her neck and collarbone this morning because Brooke and her were like insatiable teenagers. 

But Detox doesn’t need to know all of those details. 

“You could say we did.” Brooke takes a delicate sip of her coffee as the words leave her mouth and Vanessa nods with approval, because it’s just enough. 

Detox whoops, letting out a cheer that makes the employees at the tables closest to them turn to look over, and Vanessa can’t even bother to feel embarrassed. Not when last night had been the best night she has had in weeks. 

“So proud of you sluts. You’re both doing amazing.” Detox lets out a faux happy sigh, a hand to her heart. 

“And _you’re_ ridiculous.” Brooke pats Detox’s shoulder, and Vanessa’s hit by how glad she is that Brooke’s friends like her.

Vanessa’s also happy by how comfortable her own friends are with Brooke. A little _too_ comfortable, actually, by the way that they slam their lunch trays on the table, pull up chairs of their own and introduce themselves to Detox before turning accusatory glares towards her and Brooke.

“How we know y’all ain't faking this again?” A’keria narrows her eyes, taking a noisy sip of her coffee, and it’s all Vanessa can do not to laugh.

“‘Cause we ain’t actively trying to get food from you? And cause last night Brooke did this thing with her tongue that-”

“ _Nasty-”_

“Don’t you dare complete that sentence-”

“Vanessa!”

Brooke squeaks out the last one, giggling and shoving her shoulder and Vanessa can’t help but join in, winking at her. “Sorry babe. Promise I wasn’t going to complete that sentence?”

“You better not.” Silky sniffs. “My ears are scarred enough already.”

“You say that as if you weren’t trying to make me go and talk to Brooke and work things out.” Vanessa’s glad for her friends, she really is, for how much they’re always on her side and wanting the best for her. Even if they do so while grumbling the whole time.

“Aw, you did?” Brooke’s face is soft as she looks between Silky and A’keria, her eyes wide.

“Mhm,” A’keria nods, “not that she listened. Chicken.”

“That’s only ‘cause Brooke beat me to it!” Vanessa’s protests are futile because the entire table is cracking up, and her huff and crossing of her arms don’t leave her pouting for long, not when Brooke places a kiss to her head. 

And it feels right. Not fake, not forced, but just how they are, and how they deserve to be. Surrounded by their friends, even as they’re laughing at her expense, Vanessa can’t remember a time where she’s smiled as much, feeling this content. Because everything feels like it’s falling into place. 

* * *

Vanessa opens Brooke’s office door as quietly as she can, because Brooke’s on a conference call and even though it’s supposed to end in five minutes, she doesn’t want to disturb her. Yet.

Even though what she’s found in her own desk drawer is definitely worth disrupting a conference call over.

So she sits in the chair across from Brooke and waits, her knees bouncing as she tries to keep her mouth shut and Brooke’s smile when she looks over along with the tilt of her head both make Vanessa’s cheeks feel warm.

Brooke signs off the call after what feels like hours but what the clock on the wall says is only ten minutes, and Vanessa lets out a whoop because, well, _finally._

“Hi.” Brooke’s eyes are filled with amusement, and Vanessa wants to hop off her chair, come around the side of Brooke’s desk and climb in her lap, cover her face in kisses. Which she’d do at the drop of a hat, except for the fact that Brooke’s office has windows that face the rest of the floor.

Not exactly a sight that their coworkers should see.

“Hi. Missed you. Also look what I went and found in my drawer, it’s a piece of history that needs to be saved forever, and also you need to see it because, _shit.”_

Vanessa fishes the sheet out of her blazer pocket, smoothing out the creases that have deepened on the paper with time. It’s hard to believe it’s been almost a year since they’d come up with the contents together, back when things had been so different from how they are now.

“What is it?” Brooke leans forward over the desk, turning her head to read the paper before Vanessa flips the paper for her, and her eyes widen in realization. “Is that…?”

“You bet it is.” Vanessa almost can’t contain her glee, not when Brooke’s reaction is perfect, the shock on her face matching Vanessa’s own expression when she’d pulled the sheet of paper out while cleaning her drawer. 

“Oh my god.” Brooke gasps, a grin growing on her face to match Vanessa’s as she points to the title. “Our rules!”

Their rules. Back when they had been faking a relationship, back when the most important thing to Vanessa had been winning a bet and some free food. Back when a Chipotle bowl would be a worthy prize, if she could be successful in getting the blonde project manager whom she always saw in the cafeteria to give her the time of day.

And Brooke has. They’ve both grown and changed so much over the last year, gone from faking it to denying their feelings to being together for the last nine months. Nine months of waking up to Brooke’s kisses and seeing Brooke all soft and rumpled outside of work and knowing the softer sides of her. Nine months of seeing the way Brooke lights up when she shows up, nine months at Brooke laughing at her stupid jokes because somehow she finds them the funniest of all.

Nine months that Vanessa wouldn’t trade for the world.

“Let’s see.” Brooke straightens out the paper underneath her fingers, points to the first line as she clears her throat. “Number one - no dating anyone else.”

Vanessa grins. “Now that one wasn’t hard at all. I was only into you, blondie.”

Brooke rolls her eyes, though the smile on her face tells Vanessa that she can’t contest it, either. “Number two - show up at events together. We did pretty well with that one back then, didn’t we? The holiday party?” 

“We certainly gave all the interns a show on the dance floor.” Vanessa still remembers the red jumpsuit Brooke had worn, how badly she had wanted to get Brooke out of it. Hey, maybe she can convince Brooke to wear it again sometime soon.

“Number three - light PDA only. Oops?” Brooke looks up at her with a sheepish expression and Vanessa can’t help but crack up.

“Lord, we weren’t even together then and we were swapping spit like it was no big. No self control whatsoever.” 

It’s funny to look back, now that they’ve been together for a while. How it had felt like they were walking such a fine line at the time, teetering on the edge and yet it had been so invigorating, so fun. Like they had been poking a timebomb that had been ready to explode - and explode it eventually did - but they’d done it anyway.

“Number four - interact on social media like a couple.” Brooke looks up at that one, holding up her phone which is open to her Instagram profile. Vanessa’s in all of the pictures along the top row, two couple pictures and one shot of Vanessa holding Apollo. “Looks like we still haven’t stopped that one.”

“And I hope we don’t, since we’re still together. Unless there’s something you wanna tell me?” Vanessa raises an eyebrow, and Brooke’s quick to clap a hand over her mouth.

“Noooo, not what I meant, and you know that.” Brooke’s pout is so cute that Vanessa can’t help but lean over the desk, press a kiss to her lips, even though the windows along Brooke’s wall don’t have any blinds. 

“I know. But it’s fun to wind you up.”

“Meanie.”

“You like it.”

Brooke huffs. “Number five - no falling in love.” Even Brooke cracks a smile at that one, and the way her eyes are sparkling make Vanessa wonder how she’d ever convinced herself that Brooke hadn’t liked her in the first place.

“So we definitely didn’t follow that rule, huh?” Vanessa reaches her hand across the desk, intertwines her fingers in Brooke’s. 

“Nope. We definitely let that one slide. Overall, I’d say we’ve failed our assignment. Except for the fact that we’ve both ended up with the best prize of all.” 

“And what’s that?” Vanessa has to hold in her laugh so that her joke lands, because she really does have a habit of ruining punchlines for herself. “Puss?”

“Ugh.” Brooke makes a face, groaning as she drops her head into her hands, and Vanessa can’t help but crack up. “Remind me why I’m with you again?”

“Puss?”

“ _Nessa.”_

Brooke’s whine is even funnier because she’s in her fancy desk chair, in her fancy office, and it contrasts in the best way. It’s the Brooke that Vanessa knows well, the Brooke that Vanessa gets to see all the time. The Brooke that she counts herself lucky to experience. 

“You love me. Remember when you said it first?” Vanessa flashes her an angelic smile, and Brooke’s nose crinkles.

“You love bringing that up, don’t you?” 

“Course I do. That was some romantic shit right there. At _least_ in the top ten moments of my life.” 

“Aww.” Brooke’s frown is gone from her face. “Even more than when we got the blooming onion at the fair that one time?”

“Well, when you mention that…ow! Fine, fine, yes, even above the blooming onion. Jesus.” Vanessa lets out a grumble when Brooke kicks at her feet under the table, mumbles under her breath because fair snacks really are her favourite.

But then again, so is Brooke. 

Vanessa had always been the type to wait for someone to sweep her off of her feet, thinking that she would be ready for it to happen, that she would be practically expecting the moment. Except it hasn’t been like that with Brooke, and it almost makes it better, when she looks back on things. Because, in a way, Vanessa _has_ been swept off her feet - falling for someone whom she hasn’t expected to, someone she may not have even talked to at the time were it not for the bet, and realizing that her person has been around without her even expecting it. 

It’s better than a fairytale, because it’s so perfectly them, and Vanessa never wants their story to ever end. 

“Hey, V?”

“Yeah?” Vanessa leans her head on her hand, wondering if Brooke is feeling as sentimental as she is after reading the list, seeing how far they’ve come, where they’ve ended up.

“You got mascara on your nose.”

Ah.

“Love you too.” Vanessa grumbles out, but it’s okay, really, when Brooke reaches over to wipe it herself, pressing a kiss to her cheek _(‘it’s liquid lipstick, there’s no lipstick mark, promise’)_ and squeezing her hand.

Because sometimes love is more than just declarations. It’s having someone to take care of you and catch things that you may miss, it’s someone to watch trash television with you and help you make dinner when you’re too tired to make a meal on your own. It’s familiarity and stupid jokes and memories that’ll never, ever stop being funny. It’s knowing what you want because everything else in comparison just feels dull. And sometimes, just sometimes, it’s a project manager at your firm who’s terrified of spooky movies and loves hummus way more than the average person ought to. 

And Vanessa’s still hit sometimes with how lucky she is, the fact that she’s found her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading <3 find me at @plastiquetiaras on tumblr!


End file.
